＃ ＃ ＃
Another normal day started today as well.
「What is it, Kouhai-chan?」
Please don’t ask me for something unreasonable, okay?
「Because senpai asked me a weird thing yesterday, I completely forgot about this.」
「You asked me why I know the exact number of the days that had passed since we first met yesterday.」
「Ah, and then, you actually wrote a diary. Did you also wrote what happened yesterday?」
「Yes, I did!」
Kouhai-chan seemed like she was about to bite my teasing back, but she immediately remembered what she wanted to say.
「Eh, but that’s not I want to talk about. It’s about that, you know. The one I said yesterday,『let’s go back to the standards』.」
「Ah, that’s right. You said that yesterday, huh. What does that even mean?」
「What do you even mean by that?」
「I don’t really know for sure, though.」
「It just feels like, well, don’t you feel like our『questions』have changed a lot recently from when we first started?」
It’s not like I don’t understand what she is saying.
But then, it’s difficult to put it into words.
It’s like even if I can verbalize it, I won’t be able to do it properly, like drops of water that flow from a gap.
「So you do understand, senpai?」
「I feel like I do…」
「Somewhat, it doesn’t feel like senpai is lying, but it also feels like senpai『doesn’t』understand…」
「I wonder why does it feel like that as well.」
What should I do in this kind of situation?
In a book I read a long time ago, I recall that the protagonist said that “every example is a test of understanding” and how to put them into actions.
＊ ＊ ＊
I wonder if what I am thinking has reached senpai as well.
「What kind of questions did we have at the beginning anyway?」
Somehow, I want to explain these feelings to him. I want to make them into words.
Thinking so, I become sure that senpai should be curious about it as well.
「It’s something about our favourite foods, favourite drinks, and blood type, right?」
「Yeah, it’s like making a profile card.」
Well, that’s certainly true.
After all, I want to know about senpai’s profile when we first know each other, that’s why I asked him a lot of questions.
「Then, how about our questions recently?」
「Yesterday, senpai asked me about the reason why I know the number of days, right? I never thought that a day where we would talk about my diary will come this soon.」
「Two days ago, it was also a reason. About why you wanted to ride bicycle.」
「Before that, I asked senpai the reason why… you like books, right?」
With this much sample, surely everyone has noticed.
「The questions are no longer ‘what’, but ‘why’.」
「Right, right. I thought that there were many times when our talk resulted in us gouging out each other recently. So that’s why.」
Well, I understand his nuance somehow.
「There were times when our talk became strangely deep, or even went in the direction where we damaged our own mentality, right?」
「They were also said with that kind of intention, though.」
＃ ＃ ＃
I think it’s not that bad having a deeper talk, or getting the insides of my heart gouged out.
Still, I wonder at what point did it turn out like this.
「What happened, senpai?」
Of course, when I thought about it, Kouhai-chan in front of me would ask me what happened.
「I think I’ll give this kind of questioning 50 points. It’s only a given that the story will become too deep when the question is not『what』, but『why』.」
Well, I had no choice but to answer her like this.
Kouhai-chan also pressed for me to continue my answer, still keeping her silence. She put her right hand on her chin, making a thinking pose.
「I don’t think it’s wrong to have a deeper talk. If I can know something I don’t know yet from Kouhai-chan, isn’t it fine? And also, I feel that the knowledge… but it doesn’t fit this context, so… news? and how deep or shallow our conversation doesn’t really have any connection.」
「Ah, I understand. I finally understand, senpai.」
Kouhai-chan who tilted her head to around thirty degrees while hearing my explanation since a while ago returned to vertical.
「Oh? Then tell me.」
I also still couldn’t put it into words, you know.
「Even though you already understand it, senpai?」
「Eh, I really don’t understand.」
「Eh? You’re lying, right?」
「No, I’m serious.」
Kouhai-chan’s face gets closer to mine, and she peers into my eyes. There are my glasses beyond, though.
Anyway, too close, oi. I can smell a soft and nice scent from her.
「It seems like you are telling the truth… Then, I’ll explain it to you. Why did our direction of conversation become like this?」
＊ ＊ ＊
「The reason is because our recent questions are probably too direct.」
「You don’t need to say it in English, senpai.」
I enter the main problem.
「The previous us were just reliefs.」
Reliefs. Bringing to the fore.
「After filling up each other with some questions, we draw out both of the information from the remaining unclear things we haven’t solved, or something like that.」
「Ah, I got it. Something like profiling, huh?」
「That might be the case.」
Senpai also seemed like he understood.
Taking over what I was going to say, he continued my words.
「On the other hand, the current us is…」
「…just shooting the questions immediately.」
At first, both of us would have been reluctant to ask random questions. Well, of course we were. We haven’t known anything about each other after all.
That’s why, we naturally asked those『shallow』questions.
Compared to that, we might have become a lot closer nowadays, or maybe even too close.
It is to the point when we could even ask directly about each other retort to an extent. It is surely convenient, but that kind of excitement and relief of carving a wooden board or filling the outer moat carefully seemed to have disappeared.
I feel somewhat happy, and also somewhat sad. I never thought I would say something like this.
「I become unsure if we even still need to especially 『return to the starting point』now.」
「Aren’t you the one who proposed it?」
「Then, we will return back today.」
「What do you mean with today…」
It has been three days since I asked him a question first. This is something I came up with when I had my dinner last night.
「Senpai, are you the type that puts lemon on your karaage?」
「I don’t. Why should I bother putting such sour things on anyway?」
It was an immediate answer. Well, I felt like senpai wouldn’t put it as well, though.
「How about Kouhai-chan, do you put lemon on it?『Today’s question.』」
「I’m the type that puts it on them. Isn’t it good for the nutrition value?」
By the way.
What kind of profile will I know with this kind of question anyway? The current me still couldn’t understand it at all.
The things I knew about my senpai 52
It seems like he is the type that doesn’t put lemon on karaage.