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V13 Story I – Part 07

I arrived at this possibility for a very simple reason. It came from a scene I saw while wandering the spirit world.

On the flesh wall of the spirit world, bubbles the size of human heads would periodically appear. The wall expelled fragments of memories from those it had swallowed in the form of bubbles. Each bubble showed different scenes: Asato’s mother running frantically, the fox-masked narrator with their arms outstretched, Jingu Yuri sipping tea in her quarters, and strangers talking. Occasionally, scenes from my own experiences in the spirit world also appeared. I recalled one of them.

It was from after I had fallen into the spirit world with the fox.

The fox and I faced each other in a crimson world. I was plopped down in front of Asato, who was bleeding from his shoulder.

A handgun lay on the ground between us. Nearby, the white child was restraining Uka. I called out to Mayuzumi, whom I believed to be dead. At that moment, a red goldfish leapt into the air, only to melt away and transform into Mayuzumi Azaka. She wore a vicious smile as she twirled her parasol.

“Oh, you still don’t get it, do you, brother? I am Mayuzumi Azaka, and Mayuzumi Azaka is a monster with access to the spirit world. This is my realm. You may be able to walk on its surface, but you’ve never sunk below, have you?”

As I wandered through the spirit world, I came across the scenes reflected in the bubbles over and over. And despite the mix of sounds from other bubbles, Mayuzumi’s words naturally stuck with me. After she vanished and I left the spirit world, I felt a lingering unease.

At that time, Mayuzumi Asato was accompanied by the white child. Even now, the child’s true nature remained a mystery to me. The creature, which emitted shapeshifting flesh, resembled the ‘god’ created by Minase Shiramine.

The fox could walk on the surface of the spirit world. Where did he get that child?

“Asato, what was that white child you brought with you? If I had to guess, it was related to the remains of the ‘god’ that sank into the spirit world, wasn’t it?”

“Ah, that thing. That takes me back. Well, there’s no need to hide it now. It was a fragment separated from Shiramine’s ‘god.’ I found it quite useful, and it served me well. A living demon without a master isn’t easy to come by, so I was fortunate. All creatures born from human emotions are demons. That child was flesh born from Shiramine’s feelings.”

I was right. I recalled the form of the ‘god’ that encompassed everything. Embracing the image of the woman he loved, Minase Shiramine also sank into the spirit world. While the remains of the ‘god’ disappeared into the spirit world, a part of it must have survived. And Asato picked it up. Later, he turned an abandoned building into a part of the spirit world, but that was after the Shiramine case. When he found the child, he didn’t have a space in contact with the spirit world yet.

In other words, Mayuzumi Asato must have visited the spirit world in some way to obtain the ‘god.’

“You picked that thing up on the surface of the spirit world. That means you can enter it. Am I wrong? Can you do so without using sacrifices or tilting the real world toward the spirit world?”

“Uh-huh. I can’t open a door to the spirit world like my sister could. But I can slip through cracks. No need for any grand methods either. I’d like to ask what this is all about, but I have a pretty good idea of what’s on your mind. Still as hypocritical as ever, I see. Your plan is pure madness. Mayuzumi Azaka’s story concluded beautifully, without any loose ends. No one else had to lose their lives. Is that not the ideal ending for you?”

Mayuzumi Asato wore an animalistic grin. He stroked the red parasol gently, like he was petting a cat, then suddenly lowered his head.

“And they lived happily ever after,” he said softly. “The story ends here. What did you think of it, dear reader?”

Asato shot me a provocative look, but I was unmoved. Mayuzumi Azaka’s death was indeed the ideal outcome for me. Even without her, I could live my life with no problems. It was the perfect ending. So perfect it made me sick. But for once, I wasn’t doing this because I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to live with myself.

This was different from hypocrisy. You could even call it self-serving. Right now, I was acting solely for my own sake.

“You’ve got it all wrong, Asato. I’m not trying to save her out of some misguided sense of righteousness.”

“Then what is it, Odagiri Tsutomu? Why are you so determined to help that horrible girl? What compels you to go back to the pits of hell you crawled out of?”

“I want to see Mayu-san again. I can’t give up on her. And besides…”

I stopped, clenching my right hand tight. The scar from the burn stung.

I had become aware of something while talking to Yusuke and Nanami. The feeling gnawing at my chest was growing stronger. I hadn’t realized it before, but that intense emotion had likely been simmering deep within me all along.

Ever since the moment I told myself I would not let it end like this…

“I’m pissed.”

“…What?”

“That’s right. I’m furious. Happily ever after, my ass. Fuck all this inevitable bullshit. No need for sorrow or regret? Everything returns to where it belongs? This is fate? Fuck all that!”

I stomped the floor hard, sending a nearby polka-dot, toy trumpet skidding away. I remembered Nanami throwing a tantrum, and now, I finally understood. When faced with overwhelming absurdity, people want to lash out like a child throwing a fit. I clenched my right hand even tighter, bones creaking under the strain.

Taking a deep breath, I shouted with all my might, “I fucking hated her smile!”

The windows rattled. Dust trickled down from the piles of junk. Asato’s face stiffened. Breathing hard, I thought about Mayuzumi. Yes, she mocked the dead, reveled in tragedies, and savored misfortune, yet there were moments when her eyes held an incredible clarity.

She would look at me with an expression no ordinary girl could muster, like when she spoke to me under the blooming cherry blossoms. I loathed that lovely smile of hers from the bottom of my heart.

“How could she just disappear with all smiles? Did she think those left behind would just accept that?”

“Odagiri, what you’re doing is nothing more than throwing a tantrum. You’re just upset over your own powerlessness.”

“Actually, I doubt she would’ve cared if I accepted it or not. It was a good life? Really? How could she just go like that?”

“How about you stop caring only about yourself and listen to what I’m saying?”

“Shut the fuck up, Asato! I heard you. So, what do you think?”

“What?”

“Was she being selfish? You think so, don’t you? How could she only care about herself?!”

I couldn’t accept it. Not a chance. And they all lived happily ever after? Yeah, well, I ain’t buying that fairy tale ending. I don’t care if she tied it all up in a perfect, beautiful finish where she’s the only one who gets screwed over. I wasn’t having it. Not in a million years.

I clenched my teeth so hard it hurt, my breath coming out in ragged gasps. Asato was silent, deep in thought. Finally, he shook his head.

“I see. How utterly stupid,” he muttered, as if to himself. “But it sounds like that’s what you really want.”

In the next moment, all emotions vanished from his face. The atmosphere around us shifted, and the space seemed to creak under the pressure.

Asato slowly raised his head, the familiar fox-like smile etched on his lips. But this time, there was something different about it. I recognized that cruel expression. It was the same smile he often wore before he was swallowed by the spirit world. He crossed his legs regally and propped his elbow on the armrest, chin in hand.

“Very well, Odagiri Tsutomu,” the fox said solemnly. “If you’re so set on not giving up, then go ahead, knock yourself out. You’re probably not going to get anywhere, but hey, if you want to flail around like a fish out of water and meet your end that way, be my guest. If that’s what you’d get out of your journey for personal gratification, that would be quite amusing. But tell me, what does that have to do with me?”

“You know the answer, Asato. I can’t get to the spirit world on my own. I can’t even pass through the cracks.”

“So what? Do you really think I’ll help you? That’s utterly insane. You know my history with my sister. How much I hated her. Do you think I felt anything other than relief when she died?” he spat coldly.