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Volume 1 Chapter 1 Part 6

Yoshiharu had found yet another thing which was horribly wrong with this world. Or two of them, to be exact.

First was the fact that her name was a bit different from what Yoshiharu remembered, and the second was the fact that despite having a quick temper and sounding like a selfish person, this world’s Oda Nobunaga was also a girl, as it was evident by her high-pitched voice, small waist and a chest which was slightly swelling from beneath her clothes.

If she didn’t have those eccentric, eye-catching clothes, she may have been, in a way, cute, but with a dirty appearance like this, Yoshiharu concluded that he couldn’t see even a single trace of the person she was supposed to be in her.

Her only redeeming quality may be her eyes, which looked so vibrant and filled with youthful energy that they might even be called beautiful.

「Oi, knave. What’s your name? 」

Oda Nobuna asked while forcefully shoving the muzzle of her arquebus into Yoshiharu’s mouth.

(Of shit! If I don’t answer her immediately, she’s going to pull the trigger on me for sure! )

H realized that in the blink of an eye. However, the muzzle of the arquebus was getting in his way, and he was unable to articulate his words properly.

「Sa ……ga ………fughaaa ……..ha………ru… 」

「Hmm, Saru, you say? Duly noted. Since your name is Saru, then from today onwards you will be known as Monkey! 」

「You’re wrong….fughaaa… , please, remove this thing…. 」

「Ugh, you’re so noisy! Shut up! 」

*THWACK!*
Yoshiharu was kicked once more.

「You’re wearing strange clothes that I have never seen before, and earlier, without even doing anything, you defeated the Imagawa clan’s soldiers just by waving your spear around. No matter how you look at it, that isn’t something a human could do, and that’s why you’re Monkey! 」

That was so absurd that Yoshiharu had to object.

「Don’t joke around like that! I am a human! No, rather, since I have come from the future, I’m maybe closer to God, you know? I saved your life, so be at least a bit more thankful to me! 」

「First. I can’t think of weird existences like you as a human like me. Second, I am a rationalist and don’t believe in gods, Buddhas, or other strange things. That’s why I hereby decree that you are an existence that’s below that of a human! 」

「That’s sophistry! 」

「Maybe… and looking at you more closely, your appearance does resemble that of human males, and you sure are spouting human-sounding words from your mouth. You’re a species between monkeys and humans, and that’s why you’re a Monkey! That is the only possibility for you. Fufun!」

While snorting through her dirtied nose because of the dust, Nobunaga….no, Nobuna thrusted her index finger on Yoshiharu’s forehead.

「That being said, you’re a monkey that managed to save my life, so at the very least you show some promise. As your reward, I’ll allow you to be kept as my pet. You may rejoice now. 」

She said while yet another kick was already coming towards his face, but this time, Yoshiharu avoided it nimbly. He was only hit by it earlier because it was so unexpected, so once he knew that a kick was coming towards his face, he was somehow able to dodge it.

Having her attack dodged, Nobuna got angry, because that was a turn of events that she was not expecting.

「Hey, why are you dodging?! Stay put and get kicked by me! Or are you really an animal? 」

「What’s wrong with you, woman!? I told you I am human, damn it! 」

「Wh….what an impertinent Monkey! Calling your master a woman?! 」

「My name is Sagara Yoshiharu! Who in their right mind would want to become your pet?! 」

「What was that?! Some kind of monkey language?! 」

「I am saying that I won’t become your domesticated monkey! Just employ me as your foot soldier! 」

The two came face to face, bellowing at each other at the top of their lungs.

「What an insolent bastard to be talking back to the princess! Let’s behead
Him! 」

The female commander suggested to Nobuna after descending from her horse.

「You think so, Riku? Indeed, it would be easy to behead him, but he may be a
rare monkey who descended from the heavens. At any rate, he can speak the
human language, so I have decided that I am going to domesticating him. 」

「And what if I refuse to be domesticated!? 」

Yoshiharu yelled.

「Princess, this man once again raised his voice at you! Let’s behead him after
all! 」

「It’s fine. We lost a lot of good people in this useless battle… and we can always use some male hands, right? 」

「……Yes, that’s true. Indeed, right now you need strong men to work for you, Princess. 」

「Precisely. So take this Monkey and depart immediately, Riku. 」

「As you wish! I, Shibata Katsuie, will continue to protect you, Princess! 」

(I see. So this girl with huge boobs is the fierce Shibata Katsuie who served Oda Nobunaga…indeed, in regards to athletic ability she does seem like she would be quite skilled at everything requiring physical strength.)

Yoshiharu thought.

It seems that Riku is the nickname of Shibata Katsuie in this world. However, they were talking about needing strong men to work for Nobuna… could it be that this work is to carry the seed of the Oda clan to the next generation, so he’s going to be the human equivalent of a breeding bull? That may be possible…but even if that was the case, he wouldn’t want to do it with that obnoxious woman!

While Yoshiharu was indulging himself in his perverted delusions, someone threw a rope around his neck. The end of the rope was given to Nobuna, who then mounted her favorite horse.

「Since you’re a monkey, you should be good at running, right? Go ahead then! 」

「Wait! Ughhhh! the rope is tightening! 」
「He really talks a lot, let’s behead him after all. 」

Shibata Katsuie proposed again.

「No, Riku. Since he’s my domesticated monkey, I’ll get angry if you behead him. 」

「You guys, don’t run on the horses! My neck, my neeeeeeeck! Uohhhh! 」

While running behind Nobuna and Shibata’s horses with all his might, Yoshiharu thought about getting revenge on this monkey-getup wearing woman, Planet of the Apes style. While running on the slope, while bound by the rope, he tried shouting for Goemon to help him, but Goemon didn’t show up at all.

She may not appear when Nobuna and the others are present.

「Because the Imagawa clan’s forces hindered us, we are completely late. Hey Monkey, go and bring us water from the pond! 」

「Huh?!」

Since his breathing had become faint, Yoshiharu laid down on the foot path of the pond in the mountain, but Nobuna, who had just descended from her horse gave him a swift kick in the ass.

「*Cough!* *Cough!* *Cough!* 」

Shibata Katsuie had arranged the foot soldiers surrounding the pond and seemed to have secured it so that the villagers who had gathered would not come near Nobuna.

Yoshiharu then asked Nobuna:

「Hey, why do you want me to scoop up water from the pond for you? Are you thirsty or something? 」

「You’re an idiot. You really are a monkey after all. Don’t I have a gourd on my waist so that I can drink water any time any place? Can’t you see it? 」

「I can see! What’s idiotic is that fashion sense of yours! 」

「So you’re once again using that monkey language to try and mock me. Take the gourd. It’s pretty heavy when it’s filled, so be careful while walking with it hanging on your waist. 」

「Alright. 」

*Smack x3!*

He was then hit by three gourds thrown at his face.

「If you lose even one of them, it’s off with your head. 」

(Woman, someday I will make you pay! Someday!)

Yoshiharu bared his fangs and barked at her in his mind.

「Hey start scooping out water immediately! 」

「Once I scoop the water for you, promise me that you’ll hire me. Not as a pet, but as a foot soldier. 」

「Yes, yes, fine. If you’re able to scoop it properly, that is. 」

So that talk about needing strong men referred to manual labor after all.

With his head hung, Yoshiharu stood up. Well, it’s better than being told 「Become my breeding bull! 」 by Nobuna in her filthy looking, monkey-like getup.

While scooping the water of the pond with a ladle, Yoshiharu inquired:

「So, how much water should I be scooping out? 」

「All of it. Keep scooping until the bottom of the pond will be visible. 」

Nobuna replied.

「Hold up! That’s impossible! Just how many buckets’ worth of water would that be? 」

「Huh? What’s a bucket? Do it like I said, and do it fast! 」

「I don’t get what you’re saying! You know, humans break when they’re forced to do manual labor without any meaning behind it! 」

「Hmm. You really must not be from this area then. 」

Nobuna remarked as she sat on her chair. As she brought her gourd to her lips, she explained in a blunt manner.

「In reality, it’s a really bothersome story. There’s a rumor that a Dragon God is dwelling in the Ojaga Pond. Because of this rumor, the villagers have been sinking maidens in the pond as sacrifices for the Dragon God. 」

「You serious? They really are superstitious. 」
「I am. There’s no way a god or Buddha is in there. These sort of things are only figments of the human imagination, or, to put in other words, illusions. 」

「As expected of a rationalist. 」

She really is the Oda Nobunaga in this world, Yoshiharu thought. However, the one before him was nothing like that. No matter how he looked at her, she’s a filthy, thin, small, delinquent monkey girl.

「Geez, with all the stupid people in this world, you’ll start hating it. See over there? There’s a thin girl standing beside Riku, right? She’s supposed to be this year’s human sacrifice for the Dragon God. 」

Indeed, there was a pale faced girl wearing Japanese clothes in the direction Nobuna pointed towards. Even from that distance, he could tell that she was quite a beauty. Her long hair was for some reason glossy and blue, and she looked like a picture perfect example of a heroine who had a sad fate.

「Y-You said that they’ll sink that girl in the pond? It’s a waste! 」

「That’s right. That’s why I will teach this village’s ignorant people a lesson that there’s no Dragon God or such living in the bottom of the pond. However, for that purpose, there’s a need to scoop out all the water from the pond, right? If those Imagawa mongrels didn’t interfere, I would have been able to use my soldiers to scoop out the water already. 」

Yoshiharu’s eyes started sparkling like a gem.

(Old man Tokichiro! The chance to fulfill our ambition has shown itself so soon, so please watch over me!)

「Alright, I got it! I will get the water out of the pond. In exchange, introduce that girl to me! 」

「……Huh? 」
「It’s a waste for her to be a sacrifice for a Dragon God. After we show the villagers the truth that the Dragon God or whatever is just a superstition, then I’ll have that girl become my girlfriend, got it? Yeah? Alright, that’s a promise! 」

「W-Wait a minute! 」

Yoshiharu was fired up more than ever before.

As for exactly how long it took, Goemon, who was bored at the time, did use an earth element technique and a water element technique to siphon off part of the pond’s water and move it into the river. However, Yoshiharu did half of the pond with just his own arms. The persistent tenacity of moving towards the goal to get the girl could only be realizedby him, the man who Tokichiro recognized as his brother, after all.

Finally, around the time when it became completely dark, not even a single drop was left in Ojaga pond.

「Amazing… such willpower, it’s not something an ordinary monkey would possess… 」

Nobuna said, awestruck.

His work was good enough for even Nobuna to admire him, because she liked hard working vassals more than anything.

With the water of the pond scooped out, the superstition of the Dragon God living there was also cleared up. There was nothing that existed on the exposed base of the pond other than a single large carp flopping around.

「Did everyone see? This carp is the real identity of the Dragon God you worshipped! Rituals such as human sacrifices are prohibited from now until the end of eternity! Those who disobey this order will get the death sentence! 」

The villagers were all murmuring in amazement, and then returned to their houses. And then, Yoshiharu, who had completed this ordeal splendidly with just his own tenacity and spirit said:

「Haaa… haaaa… haa… n-now, introduce that girl to me! 」

「Oh, her? She already went back to celebrate with her fiancé. 」

「Eh…..!? 」

「Rejoice. She said she was very grateful. Certainly, doing such a good deed has a way of lifting your spirit, fufufu! 」

*Thud!

Yoshiharu fell down on the spot. He just laid down in the pond, and cried without a sound.

「Hey, why did you fall? I’ll make you a foot soldier as the reward like you wanted!. It’s an exceptional thing to make a monkey into a foot soldier, so you should be grateful, you know?! Hey, you listening to me, Monkey?! 」

The back of his head was then stepped on. However, Yoshiharu, whose dejection was deeper than the sea itself, didn’t have any energy left to even comment on that in any way.

(……Haha…ahaha….. fiancé… you should have said so from the beginning, dammit!)

He screamed in his heart.