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Volume 4 Chapter 4 Part 4

(Sagara…. Yoshiharu… A dream, it can’t be anything else but a dream… but, but even if it’s a dream, an illusion… It’s okay if it’s fake…Even if I can’t wake up from it anymore, even if my body was destroyed… Even if that happens, all of it doesn’t matter. Even that would be a good thing as long as he is here!)

She almost couldn’t see through her tears. That is how much she wished to see that man again.

「…I, am still dreaming? Monkey should have died, and nothing can bring him back to life anymore… 」

「Oi, Nobuna? Why are your eyes so misty!? What is going on?! Hey, it’s me! Sagara Yoshiharu!? Hi, it’s me. ME! OI! 」

「….Dream? A dream again… Uhh, Uhh…. 」

「Anyway, Nobuna….? Really now, what is wrong with you? Why do you look so sad? Your appearance is weird!? Don’t tell me… don’t tell me you are regretting something again!? Or, or you are crying because you regret the decision to give me a kiss as a reward?! 」

Yoshiharu walked closer to Nobuna. One step, and then another step. Just like a real living Yoshiharu,

(If this is a dream, let me never wake up from it, forever….)

Nobuna prayed in her heart.

「Huh? Why are you closing your eyes now? Oi, Nobuna? Come on, open your eyes! 」

With a loud *SMACK!* sound, her face was slapped.

(Strange, this is a dream, and yet the pain I felt just now was very real…)

Nobuna felt strange about the thing that was unfolding in front of her right now.

「Yoshiharu-sama, Nobuna-sama drank too much of the drug that Matsunaga-sama prepared for her. She seems to not be able to distinguish her dreams from reality… But, I believe if it’s Yoshiharu-sama, you will definitely be able to bring Nobuna-sama back to the real world, *Sob*Sob*!!! 」

Hanbei informed Yoshiharu while sobbing loudly.

「Geez, I tried my best and finally returned here after all that trouble, but there’s no helping it! Ok, Nobuna! In the western fairytales, a sleeping beauty can only be woken up from her eternal slumber with a prince’s kiss! Well, in your eyes I’m a monkey prince from the Monkey Kingdom, but I should still qualify for the job nonetheless! 」

(Eh…? This is… Don’t tell me, he wants to kiss me right now? His lips are getting nearer…Wait, just wait a minute! There’s still so many people watching, and at such a place, ahhh….b-but because this is a dream, does it really matter? Even if I kiss Yoshiharu, no one will blame me, right? So… so I guess he can do anything he wants then….)

「….. 」

Nobuna did not resist. Closing her eyes, she waited for Yoshiharu’s lips to approach her.

「Go! Commander! Go! Commander! 」

Those companions from the back troops started cheering for Yoshiharu.

「Nobuna? Y-You’re not running away? Th…there’s no helping it then… If that’s the case… I’m taking the reward! 」

At that instant when their lips were about to touch…

「A… A…. A-CHOO!!!! 」
The overly anxious Yoshiharu did a big sneeze that ruined the moment.

(… Uwahh?! This… This stench is….? Takoyaki….!? Isn’t this… This isn’t the Monkey from my dream!? The Yoshiharu in my dreams would never have such a nauseating stench coming from his mouth just before kissing me! 」

In Nobuna’s vision, though she still wandered in a dark dream, a light appeared at the end of a long tunnel, taking the shape of a monkey with a breath that stank of Takoyaki.

(And to make matters worse, there is a peace of some vegetable stuck in between Monkey’s front teeth! That’s absolutely the worst!)

The emptiness inside Nobuna induced by Hisahide’s drug disappeared in an instant.

(So this isn’t a dream after all!? So…So as to say… This fellow is the real Monkey, and those 「Go! 」, 「Go for it! 」,「Kiss her! 」cheers from the soldiers around him are all… real! As well?!?)

Nobuna’s pale face flushed bright red immediately.

「Eh….EHHHHHH!? 」

*BLAM!*

Nobuna, who had regained her consciousness hurriedly gave Yoshiharu’s nose a headbutt.

「Ow…Ouchhhhh!? What the hell are you doing!? 」

Without any lapse, Yoshiharu’s nostrils were pierced with two of her fingers.

「GO AND DIEEEEEEE!!!!!!!! 」

And then…

「To try to steal my lips when I’m not conscious, you DESPICABLE ERO-MONKEEEEEEY!!!! If we did that now, we couldn’t be able to hide it from the retainers! 」

Nobuna fiercely released a combo technique towards Yoshiharu. First, she gave Yoshiharu’s right cheek a sharp slap, followed by a slap to the other cheek, and then an overhead punch to his head.

「Wait… It’s me, I’m just taking the reward as per our agreement earlier! 」

But, these words were totally useless in front of Nobuna’s ongoing combo.

「Sh…SHUT UP! In the teachings of Christianity, isn’t it said that if your right cheek is hit, then you present your left!? So, prepare yourself to be beaten up obediently! 」

Yoshiharu’s left cheek received another slap.

「Nobuna-sama? That isn’t what that means… V-Violence isn’t good. It is never the answer or a solution to any problem! 」

Frois ran over in a hurry and hugged Yoshiharu.

「Frois-chan! This violent woman is too much for me to handle! I just wanted the promised reward… Why did I have to go through such a thing!? Ahh, this world is dark and full of terrors! 」

「It’s alright now, Yoshiharu-san, it’s alright now. There, there. 」

Watching Yoshiharu use Frois’s well-endowed body to comfort himself, Nobuna believed it in an instant.

(This is it. This is without doubt, the real and only world. Because… In the dream, Monkey would only look at me and no one else. But the real Monkey is a hopeless fellow who is obsessed over Riku and Frois’ cow-like breasts, so there’s a need for me to discipline him!)
「You ero-monkey, hurry and get away from Frois! 」

「I don’t wanna! You will never understand me, who was cheated by you who went back on all your promises! As the replacement for your lips, I want to be nursed by Frois’s warm breasts, like a baby! 」

「Um, Yoshiharu-sama? Pl…Please don’t rub my breasts like this…. 」

「Uwahhh! What are you doing, traitor! Pervert! HURRY AND GET THE HELL AWAY FROM FROIS’S BREASTS NOWWWWWW! 」

Without thinking, Nobuna sent a kick to the twisting ass of Yoshiharu as she tried to suppress the urge to cry out.

(This isn’t a dream. This isn’t a dream! It’s real! The real Yoshiharu has returned!)

「You did it, commander! Right after getting beaten by Nobuna-sama, you dove straight into sister-sama’s breasts, what high standards you have! 」

「As expected from the world’s number 1 pervert! 」

「This is Sagara Yoshiharu we all know and love! 」

「You guys, control yourselves! We are still holding a military meeting here! 」

At this time…

「Wait a minute! The one who saved Gorilla-senpai and allowed him to scrape through is me, Akechi Juubei Mitsuhide! Everyone, why have you forgotten all about me!? 」

That wide forehead… the kumquat that had served as an accessory was missing, most likely eaten due to thirst during the journey, but she was also here! Akechi Juubei Mitsuhide kicked away the back troops soldiers as if she were walking through nothing and forcefully came in between Frois and Yoshiharu.

「….Juubei!? You’re still alive too!? 」

「What is with that ‘too’, Nobuna-sama! The useless Hattori Hanzo let Gorilla-senpai stay underground and retreated from Mizusaka Ridge! I, Mitsuhide, replaced him to help Gorilla-senpai out of his predicament! Without this genius Akechi Juubei Mitsuhide, senpai would already be a corpse buried in the ground! 」

Hanzo was taken aback.

「Don’t tell me, you survived after being dropped into such a huge crack… Even seasoned ninjas would most likely perish after experiencing such a situation… The tenacity of Akechi Mitsuhide is as terrifying as that of a roach. Maybe this girl had some strange destiny awaiting her!? 」

Hanzo mumbled with a rare frightened expression on his face.

「Well, those back troops soldiers that disguised themselves as escapee hunters did help me and senpai who were hiding in the cave, so I won’t pursue the matter of Hanzo and Matsudaira-dono abandoning Mitsuhide and running off by themselves any further. 」

Exactly, those escapee hunters who attacked Mitsuhide and Yoshiharu in the cave were actually those companions that had escaped back to Kyoto but headed back in, led by Hanzo and Matsudaira Motoyasu. Their speech had been covered with the Owari accent, but Mitsuhide and Yoshiharu had not noticed that at all, most likely due to the seriousness of the situation at the time.

The experts that were standing at the forefront of the group were ninjas from the Hattori squad.