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V6 Story III – Part 04

“I’ve been really unsure lately,” she finally said.

“About what?”

“Whether I had become truly human. I’m a monster. Even in this form, I think I’m still not human.”

My breath seized in my throat. I averted my gaze but quickly brought it back.

Unaware of my discomposure, Aya continued. “I’ve been living a normal life with Nanami-san, but lately I’ve just been confused. Changing my body as I pleased was great. Then it started bothering me… Are my organs really human? How human am I?” Her tone was indifferent. There was a hint of pure doubt in her voice.

Aya was genuinely asking this question from the bottom of her heart. But I couldn’t give her a good answer. In my eyes, Aya was a white mass. I didn’t know how much of her organs she was able to recreate.

“If my internal structure is different, then I guess I’m not human.” she said, stroking her belly. “It’s not really a problem if it’s different… I’m just pretending anyway. But I feel uneasy. If my organs are different, that means I’m a very unnatural being, right? Even though I don’t really need food, I feel hungry. I was curious, so I figured if I got a stomachache, I might learn something.”

“What?”

The conversation took an unexpected turn. The white mass nodded solemnly.

“I thought that if I ate something bad and got sick, it meant I was similar to humans in that sense. I’ve never caught a cold, and Nanami-san’s cooking is delicious.”

Her voice trailed off. She looked just as sad as in my dream.

It was probably Nanami’s presence that made her wonder if she had actually become human. A peaceful life could slowly and surely change people’s hearts.

The white lump shook its head slightly. “I know. It’s pathetic.”

Even though I couldn’t see her face, I knew she was on the verge of tears. After mulling over her words several times, I realized something. I moved my hand slowly and caressed my own stomach. The child inside wailed.

“Aya,” I said, clenching my fists. “Nanami-san’s cooking is delicious, isn’t it?”

“Huh? Oh, yeah, it’s really good,” Aya replied. “I think Nanami-san is a great cook.”

The white mass nodded repeatedly, and so did I.

Remembering something, I said, “I think so too. Shouldn’t that be enough?”

“What do you mean?” the white mass asked.

I went over the meaning of my words. I felt like I finally understood what Mukai said to me.

“We’re the same in that regard,” I added. “Isn’t that enough?”

Aya went silent. Without waiting for her response, I continued.

“If having a different belly makes one a monster, then I guess I’m one.” I rubbed my abdomen.

Aya gasped. The white lump stiffened for a moment before bouncing up and down.

“Oh, u-um, I’m sorry. That’s not what I meant.”

“It’s okay, I get it. Besides, I don’t really care whether I’m a monster or a human being. What distinguishes monsters from humans is their mind. As long as I believe I’m human, I am human. That’s all.”

Aya probably didn’t mean anything by it, but what she said also applied to me.

I saw people with supernatural abilities as monsters, but I myself might not seem human to ordinary people. As someone carrying a demon in his belly, I could be deemed as more abnormal than anyone else. Despite that, I wanted to believe that I was human.

In that case, wouldn’t they be human too if they believed themselves to be one?

I reached out a hand to the white mass. Aya shuddered.

Touching her cheek, I said, “And that’s fine. That’s not something you should be worried about. You don’t care if you’re a monster. But you’re taking on a human form. You think that being human is better.”

Aya was a being that killed Aya and obtained life. Those shackles would never be removed.

But she shouldn’t be worrying about her current situation.

“To me, you are human. Trust me,” I said firmly to the white blob, denying the information that my eyes picked up.

Suddenly, my vision returned. The white mass wobbled and returned to its human form.

Aya was crying in the darkness of the night. Big tears slid down her cheeks.

She rubbed her eyes with both hands several times.

“Haha… I-I’m… I’m sorry…”

Aya took a wet cloth from the floor and blew her nose loudly. She then squeezed it tightly and continued to cry. She tried to wipe her eyes, but I quickly stopped her. She sobbed a few more times.

“Nanami said the same thing,” she said with a laugh.

“She did?”

I couldn’t stop myself from asking what Nanami said.

Aya nodded. “Hmm… That reminds me, I told you back at the river back that I’d tell you about it later. When she gave me a lecture. When I was crumbling, I didn’t want to die, but I didn’t really understand how to live either. What you said was a little different, though.”

Aya suddenly closed her eyes and shut her mouth, trying to recall Nanami’s words.

“Stop whining. What’s wrong with not wanting to die? You should stop worrying about trivial matters,” Aya said smoothly, as though remembering Nanami’s exact same words. “You have no goals or purpose; you don’t even know who you are. You don’t know what to do. You don’t know how to live. In that case…” She took a deep breath. “I will put you to good use.”

My eyes widened. I wasn’t expecting those words.

Aya flashed a bright smile. “I’ll use you. We won’t get anywhere if you stay like that, so return to your human form for now. You can do it, right? I’ll decide how you should live. I will use you, and in return, I’ll take responsibility for you.”

Mimicking Nanami’s tone, Aya went on.

“Stop worrying and return to your original form. We’ll talk after that.”

Silence descended. Aya scratched her head, looking embarrassed. Then she held out her palm towards me. Her pale, human fingers moved. She carefully folded and unfolded them.

“Nanami-san’s choice of words is harsh, but she’s actually a kind-hearted girl. I was able to return from a lump of flesh to my human form because of her words. If she hadn’t said these things to me, I would have remained like that forever.”

I nodded. The words were cruel, but I understood their true meaning well. Nanami used words she wasn’t accustomed to using, trying to encourage Aya by any means necessary.

And Aya understood that. She smiled and nodded several times.

“She gave me a good talking-to again earlier. ‘You’re still hung up on that? Stop worrying about it already. How many times do I have to repeat myself?’ She beat me up real good.” She stuck her tongue out with a smile.

The dream I saw replayed in my head. A young girl was beating up the ghost to a pulp. But Nanami wouldn’t do that. “Beat up” was most likely a figure of speech.

“Now let’s get back to nursing you to health,” Aya said, tapping her cheeks. “Nanami-san told me to take responsibility for you.”

I lay down again. Moving around worsened the pain in my stomach. But if Aya’s worries were gone, that was all that mattered. She did something unforgivable, but I didn’t want her to suffer either.

Constant suffering is torment. The fox’s face flashed through my mind.

I recalled the girl who claimed to be a monster.

They could have chosen to become humans instead.

Was she happy now? Did she still have human emotions?

I pictured the cat that ran away.

“Um, Odagiri, are you okay?” Aya said worriedly. “Does your stomach hurt? I’m really sorry.”

“No, I’m okay.” I opened my eyes. “The pain is bearable.”

Aya’s expression softened. I couldn’t expect much from her, but since she was willing to help, I decided to let her help me out. I relaxed my body.

“That’s great news!” Aya said, holding a cloth. “You don’t have a fever, but we should cool your head anyway.”

“Please don’t put that on my forehead. It’s got your snot on it.”

Also, my head had nothing to do with my stomachache.

Aya blinked several times. Slowly, she tilted her head curiously.

I should tell her more about stomachaches.

Fortunately, it only took one day for me to recover completely from my stomachache.

The next day, a reformed Yusuke prostrated himself before me. Nanami was standing behind him with a bright smile. After watching Yusuke’s apology, I thanked her, and she nodded with a smile.

“I’m glad your stomach’s all right now,” she said. “And it’s good to see Aya-san back to her usual self. So thank you as well.”

She didn’t say anything about her cheering up Aya. She was that kind of girl.

After that, Aya started visiting my room frequently. Feeling responsible for my stomachache, she started helping with household chores. She would visit without warning, set the table, clean the bathroom, and then leave. I decided to just let her do what she wanted and focused solely on spending my days resting.

Over time, the frequency of my vision turning dark decreased.

One week later, my eyes were finally fixed.

It was growing dark outside. Aya, wearing an apron, was humming a tune while washing dishes. She came to help again after dinner. She had also been breaking fewer plates recently.

“Thanks for everything,” I said as I folded the low table. “My eyes are okay now, so you don’t have to come help me anymore.”

“Really? You don’t have to worry about it. I have nothing to do anyway.”

“I’m not worried. I’ve already recovered, so I can’t just keep counting on your help, you know.”

I heard the faucet closing. Aya turned to face me and furrowed her eyebrows. She examined my expression intently for a while. A few seconds later, she smiled and nodded.

“Looks like you’re really okay. Okay, then. I won’t be coming starting tomorrow. I don’t want my gratitude becoming a nuisance instead. Congratulations on your complete recovery!” She clapped her hands.

I scratched my head, feeling embarrassed. Aya was smiling happily. Suddenly, there was a knock at the door.

Thump, thump.

It sounded like someone was pounding their fists on the door.

“Coming!” Aya said. “Maybe it’s Nanami-san.”

Something was off. Why would Nanami knock on the door without saying anything?

Puzzled, I half-rose to my feet, but Aya dashed to the door before me. Opening the door had become a habit for her over the past week.

“Um… Who are you?” Aya asked.

There was no response, only the sound of a fan opening sharply.

Snap.

A brush darted rapidly, producing neatly-written characters.

“Is Mr. Odagiri Tsutomu home?”

I saw the words clearly through the gap in the door. But it didn’t make sense.

Why was she here?

Aya looked back, bewildered. I felt a pit in my stomach. I struggled to speak.

Aya turned her gaze back to the visitor. “Uh, he’s here. But who are you?”

Creak.

I thought I saw the grip of the fan bend. The fan opened and closed at tremendous speed.

Snap.

She ran a brush over the fan, writing her answer vigorously and boldly.

“His wife,” said Minase Shirayuki.