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Let’s Head to the Church – Part 01

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Translator: Kell

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A priest came to the village.

The shocking news spread to every corner of the small village, and villagers crowded into the brand new wooden church.

The blind priest assigned to the village was very well-liked for his willingness to listen to the villagers and provide sincere advice. When rumors began circulating that he was an incredibly good-looking man without his eye patch, countless women—and sometimes men—begged to see him for themselves.

“I know how they feel, but still…” Bear said, wearing a vexed look as he rested his chin in his hand. He rarely expressed any dissatisfaction, so I stopped my hands and looked at him.

“What, did that bastard cause a problem already?” I asked.

“Not really,” he mumbled. “He was a member of Dea Ignis, right? I saw him going wild in one of Wenias’ tunnels, so I don’t know what to feel about him. It happened before the tunnels collapsed. Wait, it was the day you stayed at the inn I was working at.”

“Ah, right. Yeah, I remember.”

The memory wrung a chuckle from me. It felt like a long time ago.

When we went to Moonsbow Forest, Zero’s hometown, we were force-summoned back to Wenias, where I killed a giant boar that attacked me, drenching myself in its blood.

The image of a bloody Beastfallen was too graphic that anyone who saw me would probably call the authorities. So the priest found me an inn to stay—the same inn where Bear worked.

As a former Beastfallen, his pay was low, but he lived each day grateful that he was even hired at all.

I remember the look on his face as he proudly told me he had a wife, and lamented the fact that he hadn’t been able to get rid of the habits he had when he was a Beastfallen and was constantly making mistakes.

What was bothering him right now was what happened after that.

When a group of anti-witches started wreaking havoc in and out of the tunnel, the priest did his best to suppress them—in a very aggressive manner. Bear saw it up close.

If you knew that the priest assigned to your village was a scythe-wielding, homicidal priest, you would definitely wonder if they were the right person to be in charge of the village’s religious faith.

“He’s an old friend of yours, isn’t he?” Bear asked.

“We’ve only known each other for a few years,” I replied. “No need to worry, though. True, he’s a homicidal priest, but he’s one of the trustworthy ones. He’s not gonna go on a killing spree out of nowhere.”

“Hmm.” Bear plopped down on the counter.

“I get it,” I said. “You can’t stomach a good-looking guy.”

Bear lifted his head. I meant it as a joke, but he wasn’t the least bit amused.

“Wait, don’t tell me you’re actually jealous of his looks?” I said.

“N-Not really…”

“Forget about it, man. That’s just dumb. Envying people blessed by the gods is not worth it.”

“Yeah, but that witch of yours doesn’t hang around the church like my wife, does she?”

I fell silent and regarded the dejected guy. “Isn’t it, uhm, natural for a devout believer to go to church?”

“Sure, if it’s just listening to a sermon with everyone else. But a couple of guys said they saw the priest and my wife talking alone. Like they were having a good time.”

Whoa, whoa. Hold up. Is he consulting me about his wife’s affair?

I frowned as I recalled the homicidal priest’s immaculate personality. Would he really lay a hand on someone else’s wife? I couldn’t imagine it. It was simply impossible.

“What’s with that look?!” he exclaimed.

“You can’t possibly read a Beastfallen’s expression.”

“I can kinda guess. I’m a former Beastfallen, you know.”

“That priest ain’t the kind of guy who’d mess with someone else’s wife.”

“But still…”

Hmm? Why can’t he just drop it?

Bear wrapped his head around his arms. “She’s actually not my wife yet,” he mumbled.

“I’m sorry, what? You introduced her as your wife. And she didn’t deny it, either.”

“We’re practically like a married couple! But we didn’t hold a ceremony.”

“Why not?”

“Well, right around the time we were planning to have the ceremony, the Knights Templar laid siege to Wenias. When the tunnels collapsed, we had nowhere to go. Then demons attacked right after that. We didn’t have time for a ceremony. So yeah, by the laws of the Church, we’re not married.”

“I see.”

For a moment, I almost said, “He might lay a hand on her if she’s single,” but I swallowed the words. Some things you can’t just joke about.

“Then why don’t you just get married?”

“I suspect my wife’s cheating on me with the priest, and you want me to ask the guy to officiate our wedding?!” He slammed his fist onto the counter. “I was thinking of having a proper ceremony once a priest arrived, but with the way my wife’s been acting, it’s kind of hard to ask her, you know. What if she says she doesn’t wanna get married? I don’t think I can take it.”

“I didn’t know you were such a coward.”

“I care about her, okay?! When I became human, my life was crap, but I managed to go on because of her. I want her to be happy. If he chooses the priest, I…”

Yup, this is beyond my control. Beastfallen were hopeless when it came to matters of the heart. That bittersweet feeling that normal humans experienced while they were young, a Beastfallen couldn’t experience until they were way older, which made things complicated.

Letting out a sigh, Bear stood up. “Don’t tell anyone about this, okay? I know it’s just sad.”

“H-Hey, wait!”

Bear ignored me and hurried out of the tavern. A small shadow entered the store just as he left.

The figure, no taller than an adult’s knee, trotted to the counter and nimbly climbed onto a chair.

“Father doesn’t steal other people’s wives,” she said.

It was Lily, a tiny rat Beastfallen that lived in the church. She might look like a child, but she was almost nineteen, a fact that only a few people knew.

It wasn’t often that Lily came into my tavern like this. She avoided people in general, as she was concerned about the fact that she carried plagues. She was probably just passing by the tavern, when she happened to hear slanderous remarks about the priest. She couldn’t resist expressing her opinion on the matter.

“So you heard,” I said.

“I have big ears.” Wearing a frown, she put her hands on her ears.

“I doubt he’s a sexual maniac, but I can understand why Bear’s worried.”

“Why?”

“Because the priest’s a handsome guy.”

Lily fell silent. I placed some washed apples in front of her. She began munching one in silence, and when she had eaten half of it, she looked up again and said, “I know.”

“Know what?”

“What Father and Bear’s wife are talking about.”

“Really, now? What were they talking about?”

“It’s a secret.”

Oh, come on.

“I can’t tell you, ’cause it’s a secret.”

“So it’s a private matter between them?”

“Yes.”

“I see… Interesting.”

Lily liked the priest. Not the kind of “like” that a young kid feels, but the kind that a nineteen-year-old woman felt for a good-looking guy. And while the priest was aware of her feelings, there was nothing between them.

They ran the church together, with the priest quietly going about his daily business and Lily assisting him with chores. Lily was content just to be with the priest. She wasn’t dissatisfied; in fact, she said she was happy. But if she learned that the priest was becoming intimate with another woman, she would be dejected. The fact that she looked calm as she mentioned the priest and Bear’s wife discussing private matters suggested that Bear was overthinking things.

“I’m guessing Bear can’t know what they’re talking about?”

Lily nodded.

“But she’s not cheating on him.”

She nodded again.

“But why can’t you tell me about it?”

“Father said you can’t be trusted. That you’ll blab about anything when you’re emotional.”

That asshole. He pissed me off even when he wasn’t around.

“I need this.” Lily held out a piece of paper to me.

Apparently, she didn’t just come here to voice her thoughts. She actually had business with me. I scowled as I skimmed over the items listed on the paper.

“Ingredients? That’s unusual. I thought the church had its own supplies.”

The church had its own livestock and garden, and received supplies from its headquarters. There were several reasons for this, such as donating to the village if crops failed, or surviving even if the villagers came to dislike the church. In any case, the church had its own financial situation, separate from the village’s.

“And a large pot, lots of plates and cups… Is he gonna open up a restaurant or something?”

“It’s a secret.”

“You’re really loyal to the priest, huh?” I narrowed my eyes.

Lily smiled proudly. It wasn’t a compliment.

“Well, whatever,” I said. “Deliver the goods in three days. Got it.”

“Father said to have lunch while I’m here. He has guests.”

“Bear’s wife?”

“Women, lots of them.”

Lily put her head on the counter and played with the core of the apple with her fingertips.

“What? You’re jealous too?” I asked.

“No.” She closed her eyes. “The women are so pretty. They’re so charming, elegant, and lovely. I just want to look at them. But when I’m around, they feel uncomfortable.”

“Did they tell you that?” I asked, frowning.

Lily kept her head on the counter and shook it. “But I can tell.”

I now understood why the priest told Lily to go eat at my place. Because she would be self-conscious, nervous, fidgety, and uncomfortable.

I had no idea what the women in the village actually thought of Lily, but I doubted any of them outwardly hated her. Regardless, anxiety still filled Lily. She was worried of being disliked or feared.

It would’ve been one thing if Lily blamed others, but she tended to blame herself for making others uncomfortable.

That’s why the priest sent her to me for the time being.

“Are you gonna stay at the witch’s place tonight?” I asked.

“No. They’ll go home tonight. Thank you.”

I made lunch for her—thinly-sliced bread moistened with eggs and milk, sweetened with honey, and baked to perfection, one of my best dishes.

Now that we had a stable food supply through the church, I could make sweet stuff more easily, but it was still a luxurious food nonetheless.

“Can I really have this?” Lily glanced back and forth between me and the plate, a twinkle in her eyes.

“Unfortunately, this is all I can make with the ingredients I have. I’ll send the bill to the priest.”

With a toothy grin, Lily happily grabbed her fork and began gobbling down the bread.

“It’s so sweet, soft, and yummy!”

“That’s good to hear.”

“This is my favorite!”

“More than your mother’s own tomato stew?”

“That’s my favorite too,” she said with a bright smile. As she filled her mouth with bread, she suddenly whispered, “For the delicious food, I’ll tell you about it a little.”

Oh, ready to tell me the secret, eh?

I bent down and put my ear close to her mouth.

“Well… Tell Mr. Bear to never, ever doubt his wife. He shouldn’t ask his wife if she likes the priest.”

“Why not?”

“He’ll ruin it.”

“Ruin what?”

“Everything.”

After that, Lily stopped talking.

I gave up trying to get any more information out of her and decided to move on.

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