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Volume 5 Trouble File First Second Half Part 11

While these two things might seem like they are generally similar on paper, there is one major distinction between them: that miniature gardens are not meant just for breeding, but their purpose is to instead create a miniature world where all of the elements needed for life to properly blossom have to be contained in one small space, which is usually a small box of some kind.

「Yes, if I were to be asked that question then I guess that would be the answer that I would pick as well. You see, while most of the facility was constructed in such a way to breed us and feed us in the same way you do livestock animals, there was also quite a large variety of churches, or at least something that was supposed to resemble them anyway. I guess you can say that down in that hellish place, the only kind of freedom that was supposed to be given to us was the freedom to pick our own religious beliefs. Many of us were born in closed, claustrophobically small chambers and even more of us died in such claustrophobically small chambers, therefore. . . . . . therefore you could say that for us, slaves who were never supposed to set even a single step outside of the facility, the huge iron door through which the supplies have been periodically carried in and out were 「The End of the World」 as we knew it, and it is not even a metaphor.」

It was an all too easy sight to imagine. Males and females of all ages and beliefs stared at the huge iron door, knowing that there is a world beyond them, but they will never be able to go through them to see what that world outside is like, which was driving them to despair. And even if the somehow managed to cross them, they instinctively knew that they could not do that, because all that awaited them at the other side of those door would be nothing but certain death.

The older test subjects probably still remembered what the world outside of the facility was like from the times before they were kidnapped and taken there, but all of the children who were born in that facility and grew up there only knew about this 「outside world」 from stories and hearsay, believing that what they had around the was their entire world, and yet, when the time for them to die was coming, they could not help it but to feel an overwhelming amount of sadness at not being able to see what that 「outside world」, the thing that those older and wiser than them spoke of with tears in their eyes, was like even once.

「To be perfectly honest with you, I was like that as well. No matter how long I longed for what was written in the books tha I read, no matter how strongly I fell in love with it, I was not allowed to cross that iron door. To all of us who were held there, that iron door was the symbol of ultimate despair and hopelessness, as well as 「The End of Our World」. . . but now that I think about it, they might have also been a symbol of hope for us, because in the end, someone tore that door down and came through them to save me, like a hero.」

「 . . .」

Those were not the words that Izayoi wanted to hear from her. He turned his eyes away from her, gritted his teeth and clenched his fists as hard as he could before shaking his head fiercely.

「Hero my ass. I could not even help you, so what kind of hero does that make me?」

「Yes, it is true that you could not help me. . . . but you did more than that. You saved me, and proved to me that the world is a truly endless place where nothing is impossible as long as you have the will and strength to pursue it. It is also thanks to you that I could see so many more new sights and sceneries that I could only dream about before. . .  and that is why it is fine. You have done enough, Izayoi.」

With a smile on her face, Ishi stood up from the water and went right past Izayoi’s side and went back towards the car without looking back. Feeling the need to stay at the beach for a while longer, Izayoi just stood there gazing at the heavens above and then he slowly closed his eyes. That was the first and the last time when he talked with Ishi about the subject of revenge.

Twelve days later her physical condition suddenly took a drastic turn for the worse, and Ishi died after falling into a coma. In the end she and Izayoi were separated quietly without being able to exchange any meaningful last words and without being able to change anything for the better.

「 . . . 」

Even now, there are times when he is still wondering if that was really for the best, or was there anything more that he could have done for her. However, if there was one thing that got firmly engraved onto his memory as well as his very being, it would have to be the words that Ishi spoke that day at that beach.

. . . That for her, 「The End of the World」was synonymous with a door that humans find impossible to cross through. An insurmountable wall that only those who have the strength and the will to do so can either scale. . . or break through it and tear it down.
From the bottom of her heart, Ishi believed that Izayoi, someone who managed to come save her by traversing 「The End of the World」did so by breaking through the limits of human possibilities.

. . . . There were many kinds of unforgettable pains in her heart. She could have chosen to live the remainder of her life by dedicating it towards revenge and holding a grudge against her wrongdoers, but she ended up burying those feelings deep inside of her, taking them along on her last journey without killing them, but at the same time not allowing them to ever resurface. She might not have truly lived for long, but nobody can deny that the life which she lived was a strong and pure one. The fact that someone like her, who was undoubtedly weaker than Izayoi lived her life more strongly than he could have ever hoped to live his own made him seriously reconsider the way in which he was living his life until now as well as his outlook on it in general.

Today, whenever he remembers Ishi, he sees only the girl who was standing in the rays of the sun, smiling from ear to ear. If that was what she was aiming for from the start, then Izayoi had to admit that she has defeated him completely and utterly, but just this once he did not have anything against admitting defeat, because in the grand scheme of things, it was a loss that felt as the greatest kind of victory at the same time.