Vol 05 Chapter 156: Paspa
「Why didn’t you kill her? If everyone had attacked at once, you could have killed her, right?」
I heard a voice.
Looking around, I found myself in a pink-hued space.
…A dream, huh?
Come to think of it, Merlin came today. Is that what this is about?
I’d like to ask the opposite: why should I kill Merlin?
「She will become an obstacle someday.」
She’s not an enemy right now. I don’t even know if she will actually become an obstacle. I don’t want to antagonize that woman.
Her magic abilities are a significant threat. If we became enemies, there would be many casualties. If we can establish a friendly relationship, that’s the best outcome.
Besides, there’s no way that woman would quietly accept death. Some of us would be counterattacked and killed.
There wasn’t a single person in that place I didn’t mind dying.
「Is that so? There were a few who seemed replaceable, though.」
Shut up. I don’t know who you’re talking about, but if you insult my retainers, I won’t forgive you.
「Don’t get so angry.」
Furthermore, from my perspective, I trust you all even less than Merlin.
「You’re terrible. I’ve been so cooperative with you. Specifically, what part of me do you find untrustworthy?」
Everything.
Merlin is a suspicious woman. But she undeniably has emotions and is human.
She gets angry when insulted, resents unfair conditions, and worries about her sisters’ safety.
Though she’s monstrous, she is definitely human. I can understand her.
But I don’t understand any of you at all. I can’t sense your emotions. I can’t feel any humanity in you. That’s why I can’t trust you.
「Terrible! I care so much about you. Boo hoo… so cruel…」
Are you pretending to be sad? Do you think I’ll be fooled by such a poor act?
「Sigh… I just don’t get it. I thought I mimicked it perfectly. What am I doing wrong?」
Everything.
「This is harsh. Well, fine. I don’t know if you’ll believe me, but I’m on your side. No matter what. And I’m an enemy of Merlin. Remember that.」
I’ll keep it in the back of my mind. So hurry up and leave.
「Yes, yes, the hated one will retreat.」
The world crumbled away.
◇
「Good morning, Almus.」
「Good morning. Could you get off me?」
I asked Tetra, who was straddling my waist.
By the way, on the Adernian Peninsula, sleepwear doesn’t exist. Therefore, people usually sleep naked.
However, recently it has become common to wear the bras and panties I popularized.
Regardless, I’m completely naked.
This situation is a bit risky. My important part is touching the fabric covering Tetra’s important part.
「It’s okay. Julia is still asleep.」
I glanced to my right. Julia was breathing softly in her sleep.
She was in deep sleep.
…Well, maybe a little.
◇
On the Adernian Peninsula, there is a dish called ‘paspa’.
In the Adernian language, it refers to any dough made from wheat.
In Japan, it would be equivalent to ramen, udon, or somen.
The difference is that it’s not limited to a long, thin shape. Whether it’s square or round, as long as it’s made from wheat dough, it’s called paspa.
It’s typically cooked with cheese or milk and eaten together.
Now, the reason I’m talking about this…
「Let’s make dried paspa.」
「Sigh…」
Julia looked at me with a strange expression. She probably thinks I’m starting to say something weird again.
「Dry paspa? Can you even eat that?」
「It might lose its chewy texture, but it will be crunchy and delicious.」
Personally, I prefer dried noodles over fresh ones.
However, it’s not just because I want to eat dried paspa that I’m suggesting making it. I am too busy to do this for such a reason.
「The advantage of dried paspa is its excellent preservation. It can be eaten even after many years. So, it can be stored for times of famine. And it can be taken to war.」
In war, it’s common for soldiers to carry wheat flour as rations. The flour is turned into bread at the camp.
The reason they don’t carry the finished product is because bread takes more space, and it spoils easily. However, wheat flour is heavy. And cooking on the battlefield is a hassle.
That’s where dried noodles come in. With dried noodles, you just boil them, and they’re ready to eat. Plus, since the moisture is removed, they’re light.
The issue is water, but the Adernian Peninsula isn’t a desert.
There’s a story (whether true or not, it’s funny) about the Italian army trying to cook pasta in the desert during World War II, but that’s not a problem here.
There are wells and rivers everywhere.
However… Eating only paspa would get boring, so I also plan to make biscuits and hardtack.
But the main focus is dried paspa.
I want to eat it too.
「So, how do we make it?」
Tetra tilted her head. The paspa she knew was freshly made hand-rolled noodles. She probably couldn’t picture them dried.
「That’s the problem.」
Translation: I have no idea.
Tetra squinted at me. Her expression clearly said, 「Is he an idiot?」
Well, it can’t be helped if I don’t know.
「Don’t worry. I have a secret plan.」
I’ll issue a decree throughout the country. Whoever successfully creates dried paspa will be awarded a prize!
Someone is bound to find out how to make it
「So, I’ll focus on making the sauce to go with the dried paspa once it’s ready!」
「Isn’t it pointless to bring sauce to the battlefield?」
「Well… eating at home and eating on the battlefield are different, right?」
On the battlefield, it would be eaten with sauces primarily made from cheese and olive oil. Cheese and olive oil are already essential food supplies taken to the battlefield.
For home consumption…
「Tomato sauce is the way to go.」
We finally found tomatoes. We have to make the most of them.
「Can you make that?」
「Leave it to me.」
I have experience making tomato sauce!
◇
And so, we headed to the kitchen.
My assistants are Tetra and Alice. Julia is in charge of taste testing.
Tetra has been helping me with cooking for a long time, so her skills are reliable. Alice is good with a knife, probably because she’s used to cutting people.
Julia’s cooking skills are unknown, but I have a bad feeling, so she’ll have to stick to taste testing. It would be fine if she just mixed up salt and sugar, but she’s the type to mistake cannabis for basil.
Not something to joke about.
「I’ll make up for my previous mistakes!」
Alice was full of enthusiasm. I hope she doesn’t overdo it.
「Alice, you chop the onions.」
「Understood!」
Alice rolled up her sleeves and plunged the knife into the onion.
「Die!!!」
With mechanical speed and precision, she minced the onion.
Is she picturing the onion as Aldo?
「What about the tomatoes?」
Tetra asked, her cheeks puffed out.
Stop snacking.
「Peel them, then boil them in water… no, it might be better to peel them after boiling.」
Damn, I’m already unsure. I usually used canned tomatoes… Calm down! It’s just like making jam. It shouldn’t be any different!
「Remove the skins and stems, then quarter them. Fill a pot halfway with water, then add the tomatoes. Add salt, adjusting to taste.」
The only difference from making jam is using salt instead of sugar. That’s it. Probably.
「Your Majesty! I’ve finished kill… chopping the onions!!」
It seems Alice has finished killing… I mean, chopping the onions. Tears well up in my eyes.
Poor onions… or rather, it’s probably just the onion fumes.
「Now chop the garlic. That’s the last step.」
Alright, now we just need to boil the tomatoes.
◇
About twenty minutes later, the tomatoes were successfully boiled.
I drizzled olive oil into a frying pan.
「Tetra, use your magicraft to adjust the heat.」
「Got it.」
Tetra waved her hand over the stove. Magicraft is more suited to manipulating fire than creating it.
I sautéed the garlic and added the tomatoes. After sautéing for a while, I seasoned it with salt, spices, and herbs.
「It’s done! Julia, give it a taste.」
「Okay, but… it looks like blood. It reminds me of the pig organs I used as a medium for magic yesterday.」
「Hey, don’t say that. You’ll kill my appetite.」
Julia scooped some tomato sauce with a wooden spoon.
「How is it?」
「Yeah, it’s tasty. But isn’t it a bit lacking? It would be better if there was something you could bite into in it. 」
「You can add them to the sauce once it’s done.」
The great thing about tomato sauce is its versatility. It tastes good no matter how you use it.
That’s why I deliberately didn’t add anything else.
「Alright then, let’s make tomato spaghetti with this and some fresh paspa.」
Now comes the real test.
◇
「This is… genuinely delicious.」
「Delicious.」
「This is my first time having something like this! As expected of Your Majesty!!」
From top to bottom, that was Julia, Tetra, and Alice. Alice’s reaction was overly enthusiastic because her diet had been rather poor.
Relatively speaking, my food must taste amazing to her.
Poor thing…
「I need you three to try something. Use this.」
I handed each of them a fork.
「What’s this?」
「A fork. You twirl the noodles around it to eat.」
I demonstrated in front of them, twirling the paspa around the fork and bringing it to my mouth.
The three of them expressed their amazement.
「Almus, you’re pretty skilled.」
「Seems troublesome.」
「Amazing! Amazing, Your Majesty!!」
From top to bottom, those were Julia, Tetra, and Alice. Alice’s reactions are always about fifty percent more enthusiastic than necessary. She always says ‘its amazing!’ at anything I do.
「Now, use it!」
I handed the forks to the three of them.
Julia struggled but tried her best to use the fork. Tetra gave up in ten seconds and resorted to eating with her hands. Alice, maybe because she’s half-spider, handled the fork better than me.
No, that’s unrelated.
「Yeah, this is troublesome.」
Julia abandoned the fork and started eating with her hands. Tetra, licking her fingers, said:
「I think tomato sauce will become popular. But forks? Definitely not.」
… It seems a significant effort will be required to introduce tableware culture to the Adernian Peninsula.
AN: Adernian Peninsula Tableware Customs
- Bowls: Primarily wooden. Wealthy people might use glass ones.
- Spoons: Necessary for eating hot foods, so they exist.
- Knives: Used for cutting meat.
- Forks: Nonexistent. People eat with their hands.
- Chopsticks: What are these difficult-to-use sticks?
Even when eating with hands, the etiquette is to use the index finger, thumb, and middle finger of the right hand to pick up food.
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There’s a reason silverware was popular among nobles, and not only because it’s shiny. Many poisonous substances will react with silver, changing the color. In a related matter, tomatoes weren’t popular for a time, because the acidity of tomatoes also causes this reaction.