Return of the Fallen Volume 8 Chapter 86
Asuna didn’t know why she was upset. So what if Kazuki teased her a little bit. This was how he always was, was it not. Maybe that was the reason. She had felt helpless for so long. People had denied her reality and claimed she was crazy for still believing that Kazuki was still alive. Because of this, she had pushed everyone away and in doing so she became isolated. Isolated from friends, isolated from those that cared for her and those she cared for.
To go so long without feeling comfort was something inhuman. The truth of the matter was that people needed people. In their lives, around them. To talk to them and be with them. Closing herself off for so long and then opening herself once again when Kazuki showed up, she was dealing with a lot of emotions she thought she had lost. She realized soon after going into the palace that she wasn’t really mad or anything like that, she was simply overwhelmed.
She had just sat down in a large cafeteria. After the palace fell from the sky, the remaining people of the palace were in a full-blown panic. Triska quickly took command of the palace and explained the situation. Afterward, when the servants, soldiers mages, etc learned of Garn’s death, a strange calm came over them. Afterward, as if a natural thing, most people had gathered in the large cafeteria.
The fires in the kitchen were lit and food was coming out at a constant rate. People sat down in groups and a low chatter enveloped them as they ate.
When Asuna came in, everyone grew nervous for a moment but to them, Asuna was the crimson hero. A warrior strong in her own right who wielded dual daggers and a golden hoop of power. She was a renowned figure. So when people saw that she seemed upset, none really knew how to approach her.
The moment a few had gathered courage to walk up and speak with her, a large figure entered te cafateria.
*Chhshhh*
The moment Kazuki entered the cafeteria, someone dropped a plate and it shattered.
Everyone could tell right away that Kazuki was strong and none dared approach him. Instead, something inside told them to back away. A few of them did just that while others simply froze in place.
These people did not recognize Kazuki and had no clue who he was but that didn’t stop Kazuki from walking straight up to Asuna and sitting down across from her.
No one knew what to say or do. Was he an enemy or was he friendly, they didn’t know. Even if he was an enemy, there was nothing they could do. Thankfully, the moment he sat down, Asuna’s words eased their minds.
“Kazuki…About earlier, I didn’t mean to storm off.”
As they heard this name, a few of them felt it was familiar but they weren’t for sure of anything. Everyone returned to their seats and pretended to eat and chat but in reality, all eyes and ears were focused on the pair.
Kazuki shrugged.
“Sometimes people storm off.”
“You’re not mad?”
“Why would I be mad? It was my fault, right? Shouldn’t it be you who’s angry with me?”
Asuna realized Kazuki had the wrong impression.
“No, I…I’m not mad or maybe a little, I don’t know.”
Kazuki thought about Kimi’s words from a moment ago.
“What are you thinking about?”
Asuna’s eyes began to fill with tears.
Kazuki didn’t know what he said to cause this and quickly tried to change the subject but before he could speak, Asuna grabbed him.
“I…I was so scared. I was so terrified that you were really gone and that everyone was right. Every day it felt like someone was ripping at my heart and there was nothing anyone could do or say to make it better…I just…I just felt so broken.”
Several people in the cafeteria began to feel awkward at this time and slowly they began to leave and leave the two some privacy.
Kazuki wrapped an arm around Asuna and held her as she cried. Stroking her firey red hair, he spoke softly.
“It’s okay. I’m here now aren’t I?”
Asuna shook her head.
“It’s not just that. The moment you showed up and I saw that it was really you, all of that crap, It didn’t matter anymore. Seeing you alive, touching you, and feeling your warmth I realized that was over and I felt so relieved but then after you said what you had gone through. After what you said happened in that deep dark place, I started feeling helpless once more. You were still alive that whole time and nobody helped you, nobody pulled you out of the darkness and you suffered so much. How can you forgive any of us for not trying? How can you forgive me?”
(Is this why she’s so upset.)
Kazuki didn’t expect this at all. He understood worrying about things that one could do but Asuna and the others had zero say in whether he made it out of the trench alive or not. They could do nothing and there was nothing that could be done to try and save him. Even Glacious, who Kazuki considers the strongest in this world could do nothing. The dark energy and aura from Zetrazz allowed nearly no magic down there. The Adrola apes were an exception due to their city and the god metal but other than that, magic was not something one could rely on. Even if Glaucous went down there, Zetrazz surely would have killed him in such an advantageous situation.
Kazuki began to wipe Asuna’s tears from her face.
“Don’t blame yourself! Down in the Abyssal Trench, it’s true, I suffered greatly but that’s not your fault. The only person I blame is Fera. It was her strike that caused me to fall, it was all her. After falling down there, there was no one in this world that could get me out of there besides me or Zetrazz. Glacious was still in a weakened state at that point and even if he wasn’t down there is Zetrazz’s domain. If Glacious or anyone else went down there and Zetrazz didn’t like it, they would simply have been killed. So don’t blame yourself, I don’t and I never would. I couldn’t!”
Even as he wiped her tears away, Asuna still cried as a strange weight began to lift from her shoulders.
“But…but.”
Kazuki quickly pressed his lips to hers, sealing her words away. Asuna felt a chill run down her spine and she naturally shut her eyes, allowing herself to fall deeper within Kauzki’s kiss.
Kazuki slowly took his lips away and watched Asuna’s face relax and couldn’t help but think she was cute.
Asuna’s eyelids fluttered as she opened them. Her gaze was lost in Kazuki’s and she slowly came back to reality.
“You may believe it Asuna but it’s because of both you and Nunully that I managed to survive the depths of that place.”
Asuna’s head tilted slightly in confusion.
“We did…how?”
“Hmm, should I tell you?”
Asuna started to pout like a puppy and Kazuki quickly waved his hands in a panic. He knew he should take this a little more seriously but seeing Asuna’s change in expression, it was difficult to not want to tease her.
“I’m kidding I’m kidding. I’ll speak.”
Kazuki recalled the trench. He remembered the absolute darkness that stole his vision. He recalled the grievous wounds he endured again and again and again. The great monster hunting in the dark, being eating, the starving, using Abura’s memories and power to escape. All of the suffering, all of the agonizing pain, he remembered it all with perfect clarity.
Kazuki held up his arm in front of Asuna and gripped his hand closed.
“While down there, at one point I was swallowed by a huge monster. In the process, I lost my entire arm. Stranded on a piece of hardened stone or rock, floating inside the monster’s stomach, I truly thought this was it. Even when I thought it was over, something from deep within kept calling at me. Do you know what that was?”
Asuna shook her head back and forth. Kazuki gently caressed Asuna’s face.
“It was this. Two faces appeared constantly. Even when I wanted to give in. Even when I wanted to just lie there and die and release myself from further agony, you and Nunully appeared in my mind, in my heart. For the longest time, I never really knew or understood what love was but at that moment, things clicked. Wanting to return to someone’s side no matter what. Through the fires and through the storms, below the freezing cold and over the top a mountain of blades. Maybe it sounds dramatic but these were the things I thought of. I realized I would do anything to return to you both. Even if it meant fighting suffering more, even if it took months or years, I would do all of it, endure all of it for the ones I love. Just to see them again in the flesh, just to hold them in my arms once more. This is what allowed me to go on this is the reason that I survived t this day.”
As Kazuki said this, he felt something sharp in his chest. Zetrazz’s dark energy pulsed and his voice entered Kazuki’s mind.
(For them is only a part of it right Kazuki? The other half is for your sister, for your mother. You would endure it all not just for those you love but also for those you loathe. DO not forget why I pulled you from my darkness. If you go soft on me now, you will regret it.)
After that small interruption in Kazuki’s head, the energy pulsing in his compass went silent once more.
Asuna was completely unaware of any of this and hugged Kazuki with everything she had. The knots in her heart, the anger, confusion, aching sadness. With Kazuki’s words, all of it faded and what replaced it was a strong warmth.
Kazuki on the other hand was doing his best not to show his rage. He knew Zetrazz and he knew himself. Of course, he was angry, of course, he could not forget and of course, he still had those he needed to kill. The scale in his heart and mind rose and fell back and forth. Nunully and Asuna on one side and his mother and sister on the other.
(Asshole!)
Whether he was calling himself this or he was speaking ill of Zetrazz, Kazuki himself was unsure at the moment.
Comment (0)