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Chapter 535: A Resourceful General’s Misconduct

 

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Translator: Nat

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Royal Capital Goldonia – Hardlett Residence.

「3……2……1……」

Expensive wine bottles pop open, and music and songs start playing.
At the same time, hired dancers with pretty faces and long limbs dance with nimble steps.

Irijina takes the plates from the hands of the kids serving her and urges them to go play instead of working while stuffing meat into her mouth.

Carla and Mireille begin a drinking contest, spurred on unnecessarily by the cheering of those around them.

Maria and Melissa are happily drinking together, but the atmosphere eventually becomes strange and the two start transferring wine to each other mouth-to-mouth, which later makes them feel guilty and apologize to me by dribbling wine from their mouths into my mouth.

The party began to unravel around the time Celia, who promised to drink only one cup, started to drink her third cup.
Carla and Mireille become naked, Pipi climbs onto the chandelier and starts fooling around, Yoguri strips, and Myla and Celia pile on top of each other.

Mel is red in the face and walking around unsteadily, Kuu is repeating obscene words to a boy who isn’t even ten years old, which troubles Ruu, Annette and Adela are regurgitating like fountains, and Gretel, the daughter of the prestigious Beltz family, is obeying orders to give her paw and to sit like a dog from a drunk Marta.

Ivanna, who was provoked by Sekrit and lost in a drinking contest for the first time, is hunched over the table, passed out and isn’t wearing any pants, leaving her precious place visible for children to inspect.

「Mother……you smell nice……」
「And you, Stephanie, smell as sweet as a flower. May I touch?」
「C-can I touch too? Open……your legs.」
「That’s not fair. Mother, touch me too……」

「H-how weird……the medicine is supposed to make it harder to get drunk.」

Next to the perplexed Natia are the Treian royal family, the mother Marceline, the eldest daughter Stephanie, the middle daughter Brigette, and the youngest daughter Felicie, all of whom are enveloped in a rosy atmosphere.

「Warm……but kind of cold……」

Celia is lying on Myla’s face and has peed herself, Myla is dead drunk and rubbing Celia’s wet ass.
When she wakes up, I bet she’s going to freak out.

The party at the mansion in the capital of Goldonia where Nonna would have screamed if she wasn’t drunk, was yesterday.

「So this the first sunrise of the new year?」

I push aside the futon and gaze at the first morning as a 26 year-old.
Of course, I don’t feel any different. I’m not a child who grows dramatically every year nor am I at an age where my strength deteriorates every year.

「It’s been eight years.」

They say dreams on the turn of the year have special significance.
This year, I had a rather wonderful and nostalgic dream.
It’s embarrassing to think back on it, so I won’t.

「Now get up. The new year’s going to be busy.」

I peel the quilt off the bed and expose the sleepyheads underneath to the cold morning air.

「「「Aauuu……」」」

Nonna is the first to crawl out.
She sluggishly rolls off the bed and groans about the chilliness.

Leah rubs her eyes and wakes up next, giving my lips and my crotch a kiss as she massages her hickey-riddled neck and ass reddened by harsh spanking.

「Uuu, the morning I turn 43 years old……」

Last to appear with a hint of bitterness in her voice is Mel.
She takes one look at Nonna and Leah, then vexingly wraps the blanket around herself.

「I don’t mind being fucked together with others, but I prefer it if I am with women who are over the age of 30 and closer in age to me, like Rita-san or Dorothea-san. Compared to Leah-chan and Nonna-san, their skin is tight……and shiny……」

「Hahaha, doing it with younger and older women at the same time is the best part. As proof, didn’t lots come out?」

Plenty of semen which I poured into them last night spills out of everyone’s groins as if answering me.

「You girls and the others lying upside down in the living room are awesome. That’s all that matters to me.」

I lift Mel in my arms as she smiles with a pout.

「U-uhm.」

One more person crawls out.
Uh oh, my memories are returning.

She is the sixth daughter of a household who was similarly having a party in the vicinity and came to greet me as a friendly neighbor.
We enjoyed each other’s company after chatting briefly, and along with a few drinks, ended up in bed together.

「Um……I haven’t used contraception……」

Semen also flows out from her crotch.
Not to mention there is a red stain on the sheets.

「I’ll take responsibility.」

I have to ask what her name is later.

There’s a reason why I held the new year party in the capital instead of in my territory.

「Two hours until the ceremony? Well, I should be fine.」

All nobles, including feudal lords, were summoned to the royal capital by the king to celebrate the new year.

I wipe off the marks of a love affair as I clothe myself.

「He normally does it with more leeway in the schedule. It is terribly rushed this time.」

Not only is it on short notice, but I was also asked to not come alone.
He asks that I come well-dressed as usual and also asks that I come immediately with a knight to protect me.

I’m accustomed to sudden departures because of my daily life, but I’m sure laid-back feudal lords in the remote regions are panicking.

「There are no more enemies anyways. There is no need to be overly concerned about the defense of the frontier or the loyalty of the feudal lords. The king can act as he pleases.」

It was Leopolt who put the cloak on me.
I thought it was Celia like always and let him do it, man that felt weird.

With that said, I have to bring him and Adolph with me today.

「Where are Celia and Myla?」

「They were yelling at each other in the bath earlier.」

Adolph pokes his head out and answers.

「Ah, figures.」

Last night Celia pissed her pants when her ass was on top of Myla’s face.
I decided to let them sleep peacefully on the final night of the year and not wake them, but it was a disaster in the morning.

While waiting for Celia and Myla, I try acting pretentious and say, “Today’s a very important new year ceremony. Don’t misbehave in front of everyone.”

「「Huh?」」

The ones who responded astoundedly were Adolph and Sekrit, who woke up aloofly and came to fix my collar.

What irked me the most though was Leopolt, who snickered silently.

「Enough. Let’s go!」

Celia and Myla turn their face away from each other and come along.
I exhale sharply and step out of the entrance first.

「Guoh!」

I proceed to trip on a puddle of water frozen by the cold and then retaliate by kissing Sekrit forcefully.

When we arrived at the palace, the scenery was as colorful as a field of flowers.

Nobles’ armor were sparkling, the attire of knight escorts glitter in primary colors, and even the carriages and horses had fluttery ribbons attached to them.

「Somehow it makes us look bad.」

「We’re geared for actual battle. It is essential to be combat ready at all times!!」

Comparatively, we are mostly wearing black-lacquered and steel-colored equipment.

「If only the Dual Crater was still pretty.」

（Happy New Year.）

「Quiet, you.」

The current form of the Dual Crater is beyond crude and feels almost wicked.
A hammer from a blacksmith’s forge would be more elegant.

「My my, if it isn’t Hardlett-dono.」

A chubby grinning old man approaches me.

「It’s Lord ――」

Myla whispers, but I don’t remember him.

「Oh no, you’re a general who saved this county. It is not appropriate for Hardlett-dono, the undefeated brave general, to be dressed like this in a new year celebration. You should appear more glamorous to also ease the hearts of the populace. Or do you perhaps think that such modest attire is sufficient for an invitation from His Majesty? I also noticed that your retainers look poor. My oh my……」

Leopolt and Adolph don’t seem intent on responding.
I can ignore him too, but he’s a little irritating.

「Wait. Lord――, right?」

I retrieve a worthless memory I stored in a corner of my mind.

As the old man continues to spout sarcastic remarks, I mutter under my breath.

「Do you have time to argue with me? I saw Lord Guomasuri chatting with the Government Affairs Commissioner.」

「What did you say!?」

The old man straightens himself and hastily runs over to Kenneth.

「What did you tell him just now?」

Leopolt asks.

「That man is aiming and competing for the 15th seat of the traditional nobles. I had a bit of information on him.」

I heard it from Mistry during pillow talk.
She barged into her brother’s room, sang him a lullaby, then after he fell into a deep sleep, brought me several documents.

To thank her, I licked her pussy for about an hour and whispered sweet words of love to her, and in response she told me, “I’ll definitely be back soon. I promise!” before returning to her home.

「Lord Hardlett, this may not be the best place to talk about it……」

I suppress the urge to retort, “then don’t talk” and turn around.
It is a new noble who addresses me this time, but I don’t recognize him.

「My name is―― it seems a member of my household has disrespected the Military Commissioner…… can I please ask Lord Hardlett to smooth things over?」

Wait, this name sounds familiar.

「No can do. Lord Radhalde desires a direct apology. Having a third party mediate will aggravate the problem. Asking for advice is also bad. In the first place, he gets annoyed if an apology is late so if you’re going to do it, today is probably your last chance.」

The man’s eyes widen and he quickly runs over to Erich.

「What was that just now?」

Adolph asks.

「I heard Erich was quite enraged in the shadows. I have my own information network.」

This is information from Martory.
When she got in the bath with her brother and struck up a conversation, he apparently didn’t mind babbling about a bunch of topics including those related to work.

To thank her, I fondled her persistently until her face melted like she was suffering a fever, and in response she told me, “I’ll bring you something again soon” before returning home.

「Both are information that I wasn’t able to obtain. I’m sure it is the same with Rebecca-dono.」

If I look closer, I can see Rebecca hiding between glamorous nobles and peeking at me with eyes widened in shock.

「You have a serious problem with information transmission though.」

I just have to not say anything unnecessary.

「Berecca doesn’t have to eavesdrop either, she can just talk to me.」

I smiled at her but she glared back and stomped on my foot.
I have no reason why.

The king appears before I have time to chase Rebecca.

The king speaks of the promise of prosperity for the kingdom, unity between the nobles and citizens, and perseverance in the face of war damage.
In return, he expects admiration to the kingdom and an oath of loyalty.

I endure the exchange of customary words by patting Myla’s butt.
She growls softly in anger and writhes as usual.

「Lately, it seems Myla-san likes being groped in crowds.」

Celia whispers.
Don’t say that here, even if you’re bad-mouthing her.
You’re going to cause my pants to tear.

Although I could care less about the congratulatory messages, there were a few things mixed in that I was curious about.

The first is the new system.

「It is the duty of each lord to govern the lands that I have given him. However, looking at the scars of the war, it would be somewhat heartless to force one lord to shoulder the responsibility of the reconstruction, and a delay in reconstruction would lead to a disturbance in the people’s minds.」

At the sound of potential aid, the poor feudal lords wait expectantly for the continuation.

「While the kingdom should make every effort to rebuild, excessive interference to bestowed land would be detrimental to the relationship between the king and the lords.」

Disappointment washes over the faces of the poor lords.

「The ideal is for each lord to support each other and be connected like a steel chain, without reliance on me and the kingdom. To do this, the nobles who serve the kingdom must share the burden……」

This is where faces turn pale.

「However, I am not the one who will organize this. All of you have roles to play according to your positions and titles. The one who will coordinate this will……」

Needless to say, it’s either Kenneth or Erich.

「A certain amount of money will be collected from each noble and the authority to use it will be given to two individuals. This is like a second tax. Those two holding the funds will obtain greater power and opportunistic nobles will have to decide where they stand. Conflict between factions will intensify. What does His Majesty want to achieve?」

Adolph comments with an astonished expression.

It is supposed to be Leopolt’s job to answer, but he doesn’t say anything.
Useless. I’ll have to answer.

「If there is conflict, men will die and women will grieve. The king will use his wealth and power to make those grieving women his, throw them in bed and……」

No one is listening to my deductions.

「Next we will hold the ceremony to confer peerage.」

This might be the main event for us.

「Don’t get too nervous and pee your pants.」

Leopolt and Adolph step forward as if driven away by my voice.

This is the reason why I had to bring them along this time.

Individuals from other places who were newly granted a title also step forward, but an especially long line forms around me.

「Leopolt-san is a viscount, Adolph is a baron, Tristan is a baronet, and Irijina-san, Luna-san and the stupid Yakov are knights…… what a reckless issuance of titles.」

Having five personnel promoted at the same time is so unusual that people start gossiping.
What’s so bad about it? I just used up the number of peerages the king allowed me to give.

I’d say I was pretty sloppy with the selection.

「……you could have also give me a viscount title.」

Myla sulks.
Sorry, Leopolt’s was given in the spur of the moment.

Tristan is not present in this ceremony.
That idiot insisted to the very end that he doesn’t want any titles. He didn’t want to appear in front of the king. He grumbled about not wanting to leave the house because it’s cold outside, so I said “suit yourself” and came to the capital without him.

Of course, a peerage will not be recognized if the person is absent from the ceremony, which is what Tristan is aiming for.
But I have an idea. I’ll teach him that skipping out will be costly.

Celia also told me she didn’t want a title because she doesn’t want to serve anybody other than myself, even if it is just on paper, which I approved.
She’s cute, so I don’t have a problem with her choice.

「Setting aside the man who came from the Federation, isn’t Irijina from Arkland……」

「Do you have a problem?」

After I glared at the man who whispered behind me to silence him, the ceremony began with the rest of the knights nominated by the other feudal lords.

「Pledge your life-long loyalty to the king and the kingdom――」

The vows continue without a hitch.
I’m impressed how they can remember the words so accurately.
How was it for me? Didn’t I make a mistake when I did it?

Leopolt and Adolph easily managed, and while Irijina fumbled, Luna and even Yakov spoke smoothly.

The thing is though, before the oath, the three of them glanced at me as they took a knee and waited until I nodded to continue.
All nobles are technically serving under the king, but maybe they wanted to say they are in actuality my subordinates.
Cuties, except for Yakov.

「It seems one person is not here.」

I respond firmly to the king.

「This man named Tristan is suffering from a sexual illness caused by his promiscuity. He tried to swallow an assortment of suspicious medicines to cure it and participate, but his penis swelled up to the size of a radish, preventing him from even walking, so he is staying home to recover while crying tears of regret!」

My voice resounds in the hall where the nobles from all over Goldonia are gathered.

Some cleared their throat to mask their laughter, others could not refrain from bursting out laughing.
The king also holds his head in his hand and smiles.

「If he is someone you appointed, I doubt he is a fool……but do tell him not to get carried away with his womanizing or his ignorance. In any case, it can’t be helped if he has an illness. Lord Hardlett, you will take responsibility and act as his substitute.」

「H-horrible.」

「He said it in front of all the nobles in the country.」

Celia and Myla pray for Tristan’s sake.

I smile, thinking that everything is over.

「Your Majesty.」

But then Leopolt, while still kneeling, slowly lifts his head.

「What is it, Viscount Fugenberg?」

The nominees, as well as Adolph and Yakov, are surprised.

Although it may be impolite for someone of viscount status to address the king, it is not completely out of the question.
However, it is unprecedented to call out to the king directly after the ceremony.

Even Kenneth and Erich can’t hide their shock.
And the guards waiting nearby visibly become nervous.

「I have a few words to add to my oath of loyalty. May I have your attention?」

Many sigh in relief, though some are slightly disappointed.
He is trying to win the king’s favor by supplementing the oath with flowery language. That’s how everyone must see it.

The king also thinks as much and reluctantly accepts with a look of annoyance.

「Speak.」

My nervousness heightens the most.
Leopolt is not someone who says flattering words after all.

「Goldonia has conquered the Central Plains. However, there are still places within the region that are not under Your Majesty’s control. I ask that you please allow me to lead the way in annexing those areas.」

「……are you referring to the group of city states?」

Leopolt nods, but the king shakes his head from side to side.

「I have no plan to do so in the slightest. Some are also allies who have fought with us in war. Those words of yours are rather thoughtless.」

The king’s reply is a natural one.
Even I would be troubled if he told me we will be fighting Aless tomorrow.
Gildress will be pleased to hear it, but that’s not the point.

「What a stupid thing to say. That thoughtless remark got himself scolded for being too proud of his bravery.」

「A blunder so quickly after receiving peerage? Let this be a lesson to those who want to stand out.」

Scornful laughter mixed with malicious gossip comes from here and there.
But Leopolt is not proud. He has no intention to stand out either.

「Then what about the Garland Empire to the south. A nation that has suffered a major defeat is like a tower mounted on sand. I have learned a respectable amount of military tactics, so if you entrust me with an army, I will carve out land several times the size of the Central Plains.」

The whole room goes silent.
Kenneth and Erich are frozen solid.

「――I know nothing of your prowess! I’m sure you know the extent of your capabilities seeing as you are recklessly talking about waging war against the Empire. But look at the map! Look at our national strength! You think you can win my heart by talking big when the kingdom should be striving to rebuild!?」

The king is genuinely angry.

「H-has he gone insane!? He provoked the king on the occasion of his promotion, which should be an honor of a lifetime!」

「He will never have a career or position again! Lord Hardlett, command your subordinate to stop at once! If this goes on, he will drag his descendants down with him!」

I have also stiffened up.
This is way too different to how he usually is.

「Then what about the Olga Federation?」

「The Federation is a friendly nation! How ignorant can you be if you don’t even know the blood ties the Goldonian royalty has with the Federation!!?」

Leopolt doesn’t falter.
He maintains the same mask-like expression.

「That is precisely why, 99% of the nation’s defenses are stationed on the west. Once we control the river――」

「Enough.」

I grab Leopolt from behind by the collar, and throw him over my shoulder.
He flies several meters high and travels in a parabola before falling and crashing into Myla and Celia.

「I apologize that the person I recommended was so rude.」

I kneel down and bow deeply.

The king attempts to steady his breathing as I continue on.

「That man, he is a hotspur at heart despite his dull face. In his excitement of this event, he blurted out things he shouldn’t have. A few blows to his head should put an end to it, please forgive him……」

The king breathes deeply and regains his composure.

「Since it is the new year and a ceremonious occasion, I will spare you from punishment. But tell that man to never show his face to me again.」

All the nobles let out a collective sigh.
Oh good job, you united the hearts of the new and traditional nobles.

「I was also a bit too passionate. My intention was not to disrupt the celebrations. There will be a brief interlude before the banquet, so you may all go and prepare.」

I grab Leopolt by the scruff of his neck and sling him over my shoulder, returning to the mansion as everyone whispers to themselves.
It’s like an example was set by him.

「I can’t forgive you for jeopardizing Aegir-sama’s position, even if it’s you, Leopolt-san. Take this, and that」

「Why did you pointlessly anger people? Not to mention, one of them is His Majesty. If not for Lord Hardlett stepping in to mediate, who knows what would have happened!」

Myla and Celia prod the dangling Leopolt with the scabbard of their ceremonial dagger.

After letting the two of them poke him, I send them back to the mansion and buy two dried up skewers from a food stall.

「What were you doing?」

「Are you angry?」

Not really.
I just don’t understand the purpose of doing that.

「You weren’t acting like your usual self. What were you trying to do?」

If he answers with, “that was the real me” I will develop a distrust of human beings.

「His Majesty has become the sole ruler of the Central Plains.」

「Well yes, I guess so.」

This skewer is really hard and tastes pretty bad.

「I needed to make sure of something.」

「And what is that?」

The middle isn’t cooked.
If this is a scam, I’m flipping over that stand.

「I wanted to see if His Majesty still had ambition.」

My hand stops moving and I throw the skewer to the ground.

「The result is as you witnessed. He has no desire to take the friendly land to the north, the land of a formidable enemy to the south, or even the land within his own nation.」

「That’s because you……proposing to wage war against an ally and an opponent we can’t win against is foolish.」

I hit Leopolt in the head once and tell him that we’re going back home.

「Obviously, I will not suggest fighting a battle we can’t win. But if Lord Hardlett was in His Majesty’s position, what would you do?」

There’s no point in attacking the Empire, and even though Aless is overly familiar, I wouldn’t want to fight them.
As for the Federation, regardless if they are defenseless in the east, we have no chance of winning if they turn their millions of soldiers on us.
Seizing control of the river like Leopolt said is not so easy.

But then what am I going to do about the promise to Nonna?
Not only did I turn the Dual Crater into something monstrous, if I don’t fulfill what I promised, I would look really uncool.

「I won’t wage a war we can’t win or a meaningless war. However. if the flames of your ambition have not disappeared, I will deliberate on it.」

Don’t inch close to me little by little like that.

「The king did not get angry because we have no chance of winning. He didn’t even consider the possibility. The king’s ambitions have come to an end.」

He changed the way he addresses the king.

「I don’t want to fight for a while too. I’m tired from the drawn-out battles.」

I turn my back on Leopolt, thinking our conversation is done.

Leopolt doesn’t chase after me.

「What if peace continues for eternity?」

He asks suddenly.

「Isn’t that fine?」

My status is margrave, the highest title for a noble.

I have the dwarven gold mine and an expanding amount of arable land.
My territory is bountiful year after year and I live without any inconveniences.

The wives and lovers I have, beginning with Nonna, are all wonderful, young or old.

I can party with good people, seduce new women, make love to them and impregnate them with my seed.

I don’t have anything to complain about.

The one thing I can’t do is meet Lucy.

My promise to Lucy is to become king.
The highest rank as a noble is not good enough.

That promise clashes with the smiles and happiness of all the other women.

「What are you thinking about?」

「Are you the devil?」

I shove the other skewer into the mouth of Leopolt, who approached me as I was lost in thought.
He did the same move as the devil in the play I watched with Nonna.

No, there is no devil that chokes on the juice of half-roasted meat.

「We’re really going back now. I’m going to lose my mind if I talk to you any further.」

「Yessir.」

This matter is on hold.
I can’t believe Leopolt got himself banned from seeing the king right after attaining peerage, but then again, he still has his title, so I guess it’s fine.

「Did you hear about the baronet under Hardlett-sama?」
「It swelled up like a radish!?」
「He was absent from the ceremony with that kind of illness…… how much of a playboy is he?」

Unlike the serious fiasco involving Leopolt, the hilarious rumor about Tristan is spreading rapidly among the citizens.

I have no problem with it, although I might have gone too far. Let me buy him some high quality tea and dirty books.

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Protagonist: Aegir Hardlett. 26 years old+. Winter.
Status: Goldonia Kingdom Margrave. Great Feudal Lord of Eastern Area. Mountain Legend.
Friend of the Dwarves. Friend of the King of Aless. Dragon Slayer Hero.
Elf Mediator. Sex King of White City. Mad Demon God. Poison Resistance (strong). Counselor (temporary).

Main characters in the present story:
Celia (quarrel) ⇔ Myla (quarrel)
Leopolt (viscount, banned from visiting), Adolph (baron, thin), Tristan (ham actor baronet)

Family:
Nonna (hangover), Carla (hangover), Mireille (hangover), Mel (concubine), Kuu (king of dirty jokes), Pipi (at peace)
Melissa (meet after a long time) ⇔ Maria (love), Miti (concubine), Sally (convalescent), Maruru (convalescent), Catherine (talking about the past), Gretel (dog concubine), Sofia (lover), Leah (lover), Ruu (lover), Mireille (lover), Casie (ghost), Rita (head maid), Yoguri (naked), Alice (lover)
Mother: Marceline (parent and child), Daughters: Eldest – Stephanie (the forbidden), Second – Bridget (lapse from virtue), Youngest – Felicie (lily garden), Claudia (new year mountain climbing), Clara (crying)
Adela (flowing out), Annette (fountain), Benel (slight reaction), Dorothea (side story)

Subordinates:
Irijina (knight), Sekrit (winner), Felteris (celebratory nudity),
Natia (mixing failure), Marta (going too far with spinning the dog), Baroness Rukino Escaote (governor), Rukue (her daughter), Seika (her son?), T-99 (house-sitting), Head-helmina (house-sitting)
Polte (staying at home for new year’s), Yularen (new year’s holiday), Ijaris (new year’s holiday), Luna (knight), Rafaella (lonely)
Altair (new year event), Remia (new year event), Guigue (new year drinking), Sebastian (butler), Kroll (new year woman)
Yakov (knight, laughing), Mack (knight escort), Christoph (eating mandarins in front of a fireplace), Zillia (eating mandarins in front of a fireplace)

Others:
Ivanna (revealing), Cedric (sisterly love), Martory (tribute), Mistry (tribute)
Piris (stable period), Busco (low-life), Gildress (new year man), Andrei (lolicon)
Celestina (has a request), Monica (messenger), Jim (determined participation), Dingus, Rinuga (direct appeal)

Non-humans:
Schwartz (free), Lammy (nothing), Mirumi (lots of eggs), Alraune (luxuriant growth), Brynhildr (going to the capital)
Smoothie (parenting), Pochi (giant lizard), Child lizard (meditation)

Territory Population
Total: 365 000
Rafen: 47 000, Lintbloom: 8 000
Richemott (former Libatis): 34 000, Zwei Elfie: 2900

Army
Personnel: Infantry: 1000, Cavalry: 500, Escort: 30
Armaments: Cannons: 30, Large Cannons: 15, Dwarven Cannons: 15, Field Artillery: 10, Chariots: 30

Assets: -240 500 gold (gold ore extra large +30 000), (ceremony attendance expense + party -500)
Sexual Partners: 818
Children who have been born: 71 + 567 (++)
Current Location: Capital

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