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Chapter 329

Chapter 329: Highschool girls in tulip hats and smocks are giving off a feeling of something illegal, so let’s hide those for now.

Day 78 – Nighttime, White Weirdo Inn

The girls, who ran out of money, the orphans, and in addition even Poster Girl and Stalker Girl, are all gathered together. The Geeks and Idiots are more or less present as well, but with the Girls being struck by some kind of sense of liberation after returning to the inn and going back to casual, or even way too casual clothing they ended up overwhelmed by the degree of skin exposure, actively blending into the walls and the air without making a sound. Even Elven Little Sister Girl is wearing denim shorts while playing with the orphans, so the Geeks and Idiots are on the verge of departing from this world without any regrets left. Were those guys actually just apparitions? Let’s scatter some salt, just in case.

「「「Onii-chan, we are hungry.」」」

The orphans seem to be hungry from running around the entire day, but half of the voices belong to highschool girls who fake being little girls, thinking all is good as long as they say onii-chan. And while I was working on the Frontier Version of orphan girls’ ultra protective equipment a.k.a randoseru, the girls came in and also started ordering randoseru for themselves! Just what are they trying to achieve by wearing randoseru as highschool girls? [1]

Well, for dinner we have a new dish. Moreover, I only have enough ingredients for one round, but even this little is a treasure that I barely managed to find in the Capital!

「It’s Pizza-san but since we don’t have enough cheese it’s limited to three pizzas per person, okay? We have plain pizza, Margherita, marinara, and then some cheese, ketchup, jerky, and dried mushrooms for toppings, plus some super mushroomy boscaiola, so pick any three~.」

「「「「Pi-pi-pizza! It’s Pizza-sama! Finally, even Pizza-sama is here!」」」」

Aah, it finally got quiet, how nice.

A quiet meal where nothing aside from sounds of chewing can be heard. Everyone is munching, stretching the cheese before sinking their teeth into it.

The orphans seem to like it too, and both Slime-san and Dancing Girl-san are about to start a happy dance.

Armored Pres-san seems to have taken a liking to it as well, munching on it with delight, but the way she picks up hanging cheese with her tongue is very lewd! Let’s make more pizza later.

Now then, back to side work, or rather, randoseru manufacture. This is actually an incredibly outstanding design that excels not only in storage and mobility but in functionality as well. First of all it prevents still growing children, who have heavy heads and weak necks, from hitting backs of their heads if they happen to fall, furthermore, they would also shield them during escape, truly an exceptional piece of gear. Perhaps it should be popularized among children here?

It also has the most optimal shape for when children would be trying to run away. Being originally introduced during the wave of western reforms in the military as the new way for soldiers to carry their luggage, with its design based on the Netherlands-style rucksack it naturally excels in portability.

For a while, certain TV programs were spreading nonsense like 『The hooks were meant for carrying grenades because the design of this backpack is based on military equipment』about the metal clips on the sides, trying to slander those backpacks, but fortunately, aside from the staff of these programs, there are no other living organisms on Earth capable of coming up with such brainless ideas like exposing weak to impact grenades in such a fashion, or even better, hanging them on hooks.

「It’s certainly functional, hardly going to become a hindrance in combat, and also can be used for protection? The issue is the existence of highschool girls wearing randoseru itself… And why the hell do the Geeks want them too?! Also, this world hasn’t invented beam sabers either [3] so they aren’t a part of any standard equipment! Scram and do geeky things somewhere else! Like, hang posters to the walls or something! By the way, I will add a jet propulsion system just like you wanted, but nozzles will be aimed towards the head, okay? Yeah, it will have zero propulsive power, but at least it will emit flame. I’ll even go out of my way to make it possible for constant use instead of just emergencies! 」

And the Idiots are just as much of idiots are always, asking.『Put a wolf mark on mine』, or『I want that handprint one. 』, or『Cockatrice!』, nothing changes…

「I told you that it’s a puma! It’s not even a cat anymore, wolves are a canine, that’s like a completely different category! Not even close! And if you want handprints go to Grauman’s Chinese Theatre! That’s trefoil, not a handprint! And don’t tell me you were keeping cockatrices in our world?! There was no such a thing! I told you it’s a rooster! Cockatrice-san is part a rooster, but it’s also part snake! How come you don’t know what a chicken is but remember cockatrice?!」

I hate this. Aside from the stuff I’m making for the orphans I’m also working on tulip hats and smocks for the smallest kids, but let’s keep that a secret. No matter how you put it, highschool girls in yellow tulip hats and blue smocks are giving off a feeling of something illegal? Yeah, it just smells like trouble!

I kind of ended up left out, being the only one with a V136 backpack, but I don’t particularly want to join the craze. I mean, a highschool boy wearing randoseru? Who’d want to see that? Yeah, not me for sure.

「I want pink, okay?」「Red is the default. The iron-clad standard!」 「White for me please.」「Yellow with red hearts!」「Orange, definitely orange.」「Decorate it, like, fancy?」「Are crazy colors okay?」「Request polka dots!」「Traditional japanese design might be fine too~.」「I want beige!」「I want natural leather.」「Give it argyle pattern please.」「Lavender with transparent butterfly marks, okay?」「Black and add studs!」「Floral in Nordic style.」…………

Why are they so obsessed with randoseru? What are you gonna do if this becomes fashionable in this world? In that case I’ll be the only one behind the trends!

From tomorrow on the orphans are going to be helping at the General Store and the Weapon Store during the day. They received training at the Souvenir Store, so they are perfectly ready. And once they become familiar with the town, they are planned to be moved to the orphanage. Certainly, it’s better if they go to school, and spending days doing nothing but work is also not good. The Frontier’s orphanage has a splendid building, good food, and with direct oversight from Murimuri-san there is no room for mistakes. Staying with us is going to erode their common sense of this world, and also puts them at risk of being targeted. All of this certainly does make sense, but is Vice Pres C-san alright? Rather, she might end up being given over along with the orphans!

That’s why we should let them have tons of fun, so the girls seem to be planning on babysitting them in turns. I’m going to be busy with leveling up Dancing Girl-san, and the girls said they will help with leveling Elven Little Sister Girl too. Not to mention that since dungeon stampede can be artificially triggered it’s better to destroy as many dungeon as possible. But I suspect that even the Church wouldn’t be able to pull that off now, having lost Dancing Girl and all. Perhaps, at the very least, they probably wouldn’t be able to direct a stampede? But as long as that possibility remains, I’d like to eliminate as many as possible. I need to upgrade my equipment anyway.

And eventually, I probably will have to go to the Theocracy, and there is no telling when I’ll be able to return.

They apparently were anxiously waiting while we were fighting the war and stampedes. That’s why making a place for the orphans in the Frontier is for the best. After all, no one knows for how long we will remain here. I mean, I can’t even go back to my sweet home of a forest cave in the forest? The lawn needs mowing!

The men’s bath in this building is small, so orphan boys were taken to the bath in the main building by Poster Girl’s parents. Orphan Girls are with the Girls.

「*Sigh*, I kind of missed the wooden bath of this inn? Well, although I was the one who made it, and there also was one at Murumuri Castle as well, but…」

(Jiggle-Jiggle)

The General Store’s shopkeeper, as usual, sent a thick stack of order forms, but I’ll be done with that in no time. With『Wisdom』’s high speed and precise control it shouldn’t take long. Everyone is starting from 1F tomorrow, so there is no particular urgency for gear either. Let’s take things easy today. Yes, slow, and easy? Carefully, slowly, without rushing, enjoying every bit?

But Girls-only Meeting is taking a while? I feel like they’ve gotten even longer since Dancing Girl-san joined in? The contents are a maidens’ secret, naturally.

「If only things could always be this peaceful, right? This continent should be fine as long as the Frontier’s situation is managed somehow, so why do they keep trying to stir up trouble here?」

(Bounce-Bounce)

Yes, this situation should be the most peaceful. Thinking about it in general terms, this should be it. But previously, it resulted in a war anyway. Well, I didn’t give them a chance for war at all, but they started it anyway, even though I thought it cannot happen.

Back that, the Librarian called it 『Stupidity』, no matter how hard one ponders and what countermeasures one takes, there is no stopping 『Stupidity』. But if so, what is going to follow? That being the case, the Confederation have split at companies level and are currently fighting among themselves, and with their funds stolen, and fleets destroyed, their military power has crumbled as well. Regardless if it’s stupidity or not, they can’t do anything at the moment.

The Theocracy lost its greatest trump card in 『Dancing Girl』, and no longer the means to control her.After all,『Collar of Subordination』that they used to control Dancing Girl is now in bag. Yeah, for some reason all of the scummy items keep coming my way, forcing my Affection Rating-san to flee?

And it’s only a guess, but I think that those artificial stampedes were triggered through Dancing Girl’s abilities. After all, I sensed in the mana something close to her『Return from the Dead』. If that is the case, then the Church lost their supply of magic stones, monopoly on processing technologies, their greatest combat asset of Dancing Girl-san, and the means to trigger artificial stampedes, their last resort measure. But is it possible that they won’t give up despite all of that? Perhaps they still have more cards up their sleeves.

And nothing suggests that there is no possibility of them still planning to take back Dancing Girl. The very idea of them capturing Dancing Girl that was once freed comes with tons of puzzling questions, but if 『Stupidity』is involved, they surely will try it anyway. Magic stones, me, with have the technology for their processing, Dancing Girl, and『Collar of Subordination』are all here. If they want to take everything back, then all of it is gathered at one place.

Even if considering the worst case scenario, and they still do have a Dancing Girl-class trump card left, if they are equal to Dancing Girl-san, they wouldn’t be able to achieve a decisive victory, rather, with Armored Pres-san and Slime-san around it can only end in a beating. The same goes for conventional military forces. They have no chances of success in this land, fighting against the Frontier Army and Pres and others. Plus the Kingdom won’t be affected by subterfuge anymore. Even if they are really dumb, would they really make a move despite all of this? Is it possible to be delusional enough to see a chance of victory here? Yeah, the only thing I can see is beating. If it was me I’d run away!

「In the end, all we can do is prepare. That is the most orthodox and failsafe approach. Even though we could happily live in peace if they wouldn’t do anything~.」

(Jiggle Jiggle)

Work is progressing nicely thanks to the high-speed conveyor assembly-line system operated by magic hands that is covering the entire room. It seems we were quite behind on custom orders that couldn’t be covered by workshops’ mass production. And by the time I was almost done, Armored Pres-san and Dancing Girl-san strolled into a room full of tentacles, wearing mini-skirt stewardess outfits, and were immediately caught by Magic Hands.

Trapped in a sea of tentacles and Magic Hands boosted by 『Lewd Arts』, 『Sex King』, and now also 『Sensitivity Boost』, they are sinking and drowning, yeah, that was a bad timing? If at the very least they wore mini-skirt sailor uniforms they might’ve been able to avoid sinking, but mini-skirt stewardesses are done for.

After the emergency take off stewardesses in minis continued the ascent until finally hitting seventh heaven.. And they are crashing? Or so it seemed as they returned to the same trajectory and then again began falling, and yet they still tried to scramble… Ah, got intercepted. Well, their poses seem kinda acrobatic? And here they are taking off again, so it’s fine, I guess? They do seem to be feeling mighty fine? In more ways than one? What do I do if they go through the stratosphere?