Chapter 381
Day 90 – Morning, White Weirdo Inn
And the name of the newly discovered power was 『Mutation』! Yup, let’s report it.
The power of『Aberrant Necklace – Mutation, Aberration, Mucus (All Resistances, All Status Ailment Infliction), +DEF』worked not only on the tentacles, but it also allowed to change and transform the body and flesh through magic power. Yeah, that was amazing!
Naturally, transformed Highschool Boy invaded the dungeons and went on a spectacular rampage in there, repeatedly performing resolute incursions and daring retreats, building and expanding on his story of isekai adventure, filled with thrill and suspense. Even the mucus played a great role in that tale, performing great many deeds. 『Aberrant Necklace』-san surely must feel accepted and relived, finally getting to play such a great part after being of no use for so long. Hardly enough can be said of the heroic escapades of the transformed Highschool Boy in the dungeons of soft and warm flesh, but I’m pretty sure I’d get myself killed if I squeak a word of it, being currently subjected to a super furious sermon and well, getting beaten.
「I would die, I would have died, I almost lost my life in that hell! …Losing conscious, over and over, I was close to death!」
「Mind, breaking on the verge of madness
My brain sapped of reason, gripped by insanity!
It’s a sin and a crime too heinous and wicked!」
New experiments are bound to go through inevitable accidents, and pursuits of truth sometimes produce earth shattering results… Or if put into simpler terms, it was too fun so I got a bit carried away? How should I put it, kind of a momentum sort of thing? I guess? Like, I mean, being surrounded for an entire day by 26 girls in bikinis and on top of that there were also two in semi bikinis. So, obviously, with Highschool Boy being in FULL CHARGE mode, I ended up working really hard? Kind of?
However, originally, earnestly exploring dungeons is to be expected of Highschool Boy summoned to another world, just single-mindedly giving his all in challenging dungeons and his own limits, sparing no effort in his valiant advance, and yet I’m getting scolded. Well, I can’t say that I didn’t think that this might be a little overboard, but in the end, this wonderful adventure of a hardworking Highschool Boy came to a heartwarming conclusion after 78 explorations. They are really pissed? Damn, this is scary?
「My mind and memories are in chaos
My head is splitting with madness and delight?
Were you trying to kill us?!」
「That is lethal, it could, shatter our minds! It can kill even an immortal! Dangerous!」
「No, even if you say kill, since immortals can’t die, isn’t that what makes them immortal? Or rather, I’ve been closely monitoring your vitals with 『Rajingan』so it’s alright? Yeah, I’ve been pushing it to the very limits, but I’m actually paying close attention to staying with them, so it’s totally safe and stuff?」
That’s right, this world has such a thing as HP! And both of them have Regeneration, moreover, they are ex-Dungeon Emperors with powerful undead attribute No Life King, trained every night to develop their high speed Regeneration. So it’s probably alright?
「「It wasn’t alright! We kept mentally dying! We were dying in a way that has nothing to do with HP! Nothing safe about it at all!」」
They are always getting angry about tentacles, so yesterday I held back and went with transformed Highschool Boy, using 『Mucus』ro raise sensitivity, but it’s still an issue? Going through much trial and research I used the shape and movements that I knew would’ve pleased the two the most, just what is the problem, I wonder? Is this a phase or something…? Is it actually a phase if they are forever seventeen?! How complicated.
Using all of 『Lewd Arts』that I so acquired though diligent and painstaking effort still got me scolded? By the way, when they are going all out on me, teaming up and violating with『Heights of Sexual Techniques』, they seem to see no issue there, calling it a service, just what is this injustice? I wonder if the issue would be fixed if I changed the branding from Highschool Boy Tentacle Service to Sex King Voluntary Labor of Love or something?
…Starting tonight, the Orphans will move to the orphanage. There’s a school there, lots of friends, Murimur-san, maids, and teachers too, it’s a comfortable environment for children. The little tanuki looks tearful since morning at the thought of being separated from the Orphans, but would it really be that bad if we put her into the orphanage as well? I mean, even if she got mixed in, probably no one would notice.
「「「「Itadakimaaaasu」」」」
We all eat together. But we go to dungeons, and the Orphans go off to work. This isn’t how it should be. They should be playing a lot, learning a ton, being spoiled plenty, and just helping out a tiny bit. Being with us makes them work… they feel like they have to work just as hard as we do. We don’t have enough time to let them play, nor do we have enough time to give them proper attention.
「Hey now, little tanuki, here’s a hot dog, so don’t cry. It’s okay, when you grow up, you’ll be able to leave the orphanage. And if you don’t grow up, you can always transfer to a flat world where being flat isn’t a problem, wait, hey, stop, (chomp) GYUUUAAAHH!」
「I’m not a tanuki, and I’m not flat or two-dimensional! I’m in a gentle, modest phase of growth, this is the ‘before’ stage! And I’m not crying either!」
As usual, I wring money out of the general store and weapon shop in the morning, then stop by the Adventurers’ Guild to look for worthwhile requests, only to get glared at. I mean, nothing changed at all! At this point the notice board is basically a monument to impermanence, permanent and eternal?
I dash forward with a single stroke of sword surging forth with a gust of wind, if I became a thousand winds,[1] that’d be an issue! Relaxing, slicing as if just brushing past with speed alone, carving a line straight through, it’s a sword technique balanced right at the edge of Kyojitsu. Maintaining perfect control with 99% Magic Wrap, if I added 1% more, it would become 100,000%. Somehow that math doesn’t feel quite right, but at 99%, my body’s fine. But it’s weak.
It must be geometric progression, not linear. If I truly went to 100%, I’d probably disappear. Even the boys, being over level 100, can’t last a second with this gear, and I have tons of such items on me. I’ve preset the death threshold at 100%, and I’m barely holding control right before that point… So if I try probing further for the limit, I’d self-destruct. Just a tiny increase in force, insignificant in scale, becomes a massive geometric spike, and that overwhelming power turns into recoil that breaks me. I can’t explain it in numbers, but that’s how it feels. In short, it hurts.
Two Walks, Four Step, Closed Promenade, Progressive Link, Open, Reverse Turn, Lady, Outside Closed Promenade, Back Corte, then from Two Walks to Open Reverse Turn, Lady, Outside into Lock Turn and Natural Twist Turn, wait, how does the Natural Promenade Turn go again? Use the feet to maneuver, make the body dance. I can see the opponent’s movements coming, and they can’t follow mine. I pick the most advantageous, optimal route, measure the distance, and sync the timing.
Spinning its long battle axe 「Axe Armor Lv80」raising clouds of dust. That massive, fast-spinning axe possesses terrifying destructive power, but once it passes through, it leaves a plain safe zone in its wake. In that instant before it completes a full turn and returns, I can dash in, strike, and immediately back off! Yes, battle is like a dance: the tempo of charging in and bailing out. Slip in, completely ignore what the enemy wants you to do, do only what you want, and then vanish. Mhm, not bad. I feel like I have a natural talent for this?
As the final axe swing came around, I pushed off the floor as if drawn into the spin, leaping in and bringing my blade down on the shoulder joint of its armor. Sliding across the hard plate, slashing through as I dashed past, spinning halfway, then, breath out.
To put it simply: if it doesn’t hit, I don’t die, if I hit them, they die. Same as always. Strength, toughness, level, none of that matters. Whoever kills first wins, it’s all about speed. As long as I stay faster and more skilled, and dodge completely and perfectly, I can keep fighting.
There’s no such thing as an overpowered, broken cheat ability. But if you go with the original meaning of 「cheat」, as in trickery or deception, then sure, I can cheat. After all, the essence of a cheat is 「someone who does something unfair」In a world this unfair, I’ve got zero interest in fighting fair. I mean, come on, monsters are cheats right from the start, aren’t they? Yeah, this isn’t my fault.
「Something like this? I mean, I just watched some dancing moves and merely copied them, I don’t really get it? Armored Pres-san’s sword is also impossible for me to recreate as is, so I just mixed stuff together and faked it and maybe cheated a little? Sort of?」
Yeah, it’s a trick.『Kyojitsu』itself is a no-motion, no-tempo strike. A rapid, instantaneous movement from stillness. I use the rhythm of dance to cover for that, mask my poor technique and lack of power with spinning motion. Based on past experience, when something’s impossible, if I just combine and blend what I’ve got, I can usually cheat my way through. Basically, if you can kill, the problem gets resolved one way or another.
「Horizontal movement was good.
But you’ll also need
Vertical motion and diagonal rotational axes.」
「You don’t need strength. Just rotation, speed is fine. Keep the blade aligned… stay aware of that.」
(Jiggle-Jiggle)
Ah, I see. Getting chewed on by the flat-world tanuki this morning must’ve locked me into horizontal movement only. Circles are fine, but I hadn’t gotten to spherical motion. Which means, the flat-world tanuki will never obtain two spherical objects. I mean, you’re sixteen and still in your growth phase, there has to be a limit? And even if by some miracle there is a bit of growth left, she’s already over Lv100, so the aging is super slow = the growth is super delayed. The theory checks out!
That’s what everyone’s worried about, but from another angle, it’s a death game, yeah, but if I turn it into a luck game, with LuK at LvMAX Limit Broken, there’s a chance that even hit reg might work in my favor, and as long as I don’t get hit, I’m fine. Sure, I’ve got paper-thin defense and I’m still the weakest character, but in a world full of hard restrictions, having ultra-fast reaction time and the most vicious gear makes me ultra efficient in a way?
Deflect, don’t resist, just redirect, don’t take the full hit, just flow with it. Always catch at just the right angle, interfere with the force vector, and divert it. If I can’t avoid it perfectly, then I just shift it off course. Seems like I’m good at that kind of shifting and cheating, the girls even said 「Haruka-kun, your way of life is so off it’s almost stylish」… Wait, that wasn’t praise! Hold on! They said it with a smile, so I thought it was a compliment, but now that I think about it, they were totally dissing me!
Parry it with the World Tree staff, shift it with the shoulder shield, deflect it with the gauntlet, or rather, the glove, and forcibly create an escape route. But with Lv82 PoW-focused enemies, even a glancing blow through a deflection still causes damage, eating into HP. Still, don’t underestimate my 『Regeneration』 LvMAX! Do you have any idea how much I boosted my『Regeneration』through the endless nightly trials? I’ve reached beyond the limit, broken past it, kept regenerating, kept pushing forward, and got yelled at and glared at. A scratch like this isn’t even close to outpacing my hard-working nightly『Regeneration』-san. No way I could defeat two Dungeon Emperors otherwise, that would be laughable! I have to finish them off, because if I don’t, the two of them will team up and unleash the most terrifyingly indecent counterattack the world has ever seen, and it’ll be a never-ending long-run!
Huh? They are looking at me with those Flat Gaze. Was I muttering out loud? Better wrap this up before I get scolded.
Whipping vines that are both long and flixble yet incredibly tough, 「Whip Grass Lv82」, unleash devastating lash attacks, but compared to Pres-sama’s scolding whip they’re worse than a jump rope! That thing is really scaryy! Cut, reap, and parry, then blend high-speed dance footwork with ultimate, stripped-down sword strokes to build a combat dance and leap in. The vines’ flexible nature makes their trajectories hard to read, so dodging is tricky, but I deflect, step inside, and slice them apart, without『Regeneration』 I’d be in trouble, yet with regen speed at MAX a light graze is nothing at all.
「Thanks. I mean, I’ve somehow tuned it, but whips have that irresistible allure overflowing with temptation? Even so, I don’t have a kink for being whipped, nor do I plan to awaken one, okay? Shouting, 「Awaken, O hidden fetish dwelling in my soul!」[2] isn’t happening, ever. I mean, it’s a whip, right? That hurts, you know?」
They must be gauging my limits. Don’t underestimate me, I’m great at faking and cheating! A limit can be easily faked by endlessly blurring it, at which point it become infinite, and if you hit your peak, just cheat it as well? As Marie might’ve said, or so I try to fake some plausible sounding quote. Yeah, she probably never said that.
Still, it seems they might not let me fight on the 90th floor. Or rather, they ran off because they couldn’t hold back anymore. Apparently they weren’t worried about my body but about the poor monsters (prey). The deeper we go, the more Slime-san wants to eat, and there’s no monster leftovers left behind anymore.
The girls probably told it to keep an eye on me… but after just three floors its patience hit its limit! It’s combat power is unlimited, but its stamina for waiting is non-existent!
[TL Note: [1] Reference to bereavement poem “Immortality” by Clare Harner, titled “Becoming a thousand winds” in japanese translation. Basically, he is saying that if he became a thousand winds he’d be dead.
[2] Is this a JoJo reference? <_< ]
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