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Chapter 401 part 2

Well, I came out here to gather mushrooms because I have no money, so I don’t have any coins anyway, maybe it’s not an issue. But then again, if I flicked a mushroom up with my finger and then launched it like a bullet, that seems like a different kind of problem. As I continue to ponder the philosophical dilemmas of another world, I continue picking mushrooms. It’s a complicated question though, would the name go the straightforward 『Super Electromagnetic Mushroom Cannon (RailShroom)』?

My item bag is still overflowing with mushrooms. I’ve got way more than enough stock, but they don’t sell. The really expensive mushrooms get rejected for buyback, so they can’t be converted into cash, meaning I have stuff but it can’t be sold. So I’m stuck gathering cheap mushrooms near the edges of the forest for general sale. What a hollow task, gathering cheap mushrooms, even though I want lots of money. And since we are just on the outskirts of the forest, it’s nothing but goblins out here. All weaklings under level 10, that can’t be used even for practice.

And while we were at it, we found a cave.

「It doesn’t look like a Dungeon, more like a regular cave, but I still don’t really know the difference, how do you even tell it apart from a burrow? Or rather, rocky caves are where it gets seriously dangerous, right? Revenge plots are just crazy? If it’s a Dungeon Master, you’re allowed to eat them, but if it’s the King of the Cavern, you just apologize and run, got it?」[TL Notes: another reminder that Count of The Count of Monte Cristo, was adapted as King of the Cavern in Japanese]

(Jiggle-Jiggle～)

Still, it’s a cave. If it’s a Cavern King, he probably won’t be that strong, and his revenge wouldn’t be anything to worry about. Such damp gloomy caves tend to have terrible air though. It’s a pretty suspicious-looking cave, but there’s nothing here. I’ve already scanned it with Space Perception and confirmed it’s empty. Well, since there’s a hole, might as well go in. I went all the way to its end and… then started digging even further. Conserving energy I held my hand up to the walls, using『Holding』 to suspend the soil and channeling Earth Magic to move the dirt aside in a tunnel shape, slowly advancing. It was becoming less of a cave and more like a mine. I used alchemy to 『Transmute』 and harden the walls, built supports as I went to reinforce the structure, and kept using 『Space Perception』 as I dug forward in search of mithril.

「Hm~, there is copper over there, but it’s not that much, so whatever, and over there seems like iron… Also not that much, and purity seems kind of low too, so gracefully ignore that as well… As expected, when you go out of your way to search for it intentionally, it’s not that easy to find, huh? (Jiggle-Jiggle) Huh? No, look, it’s see-though, you know? It’s basically a challenge and a provocation for a Highschool Boy, at which one can’t help but pounce and eat it whole without even reading the message, a scary lesson on the dangers of overeating straight out of fairytales? (Bounce-Bounce) Well, I also kind of thought that it’s sort of wasteful, but a Highschool Boy has Hopes and Dreams he can’t yield on! Like See-Through?」　　

In fact, mithril is a mythical metal that isn’t supposed to exist, so not being able to find any is actually normal. They do talk about weapons out of mithril existing in ancient times, but those are pretty much just legends that kinda border on fairy tales. But I know that it does exist, and I also was able to dig up some. I tried mining, leaving the result up to Epic Luck-san, but looks like I was too naive. I mean, a cave? At such a place? Anyone would think that it’s a flag? I almost shouted from excitement, but turns out that was premature.

While collecting only the nearby iron, I kept extending the tunnel deeper. The tunnel’s necessary anyway, and I’ve been told they’ll contract me officially for it once the budget is secured, but since Meripapa-san is broke, I couldn’t wait and just started digging myself. I tried to match the original planned route for the tunnel as much as possible, but it’s nothing but iron. Maybe I should just go on a Mithril Golem hunting spree and start diving into every Dungeon I find? If it comes to that, I might need to consider farming mithril through nonlethal Dungeon Master capture methods. Seriously, it’s all iron, some copper too, and occasionally silver or gold, but just barely.

「Looks like sticking to mushroom gathering would’ve been more productive~. But, the Demon Scythes are working hard, and me handling the mining helps divide the labor, so that is fine, but nothing’s turning up, huh~. And if we don’t find any, the gear is gonna be a huge problem. Armored Pres-san’s sword still hasn’t been mithrilized, and my 『Aberrant Necklace』is still… Well, turning into an aberration or a mutant right now would be a disaster, so let’s leave that be.」

(Jiggle-Jiggle)

Better not. It seems this wouldn’t end with just a scolding! I dug up a bit of mithril and a little black iron, but the amounts were pitiful. If I reduce the alloy ratio to stretch the material, the performance drops too, so I really need a lot, but I’m only finding scattered bits. There’s no solid vein. So the piles of iron, copper, silver, and gold just keep growing. I’m gathering loads of firm sediment that seems ideal for construction, but I still haven’t hit the jackpot with mithril, so I keep gathering it bit by bit while digging further. I’ve already mined more iron than I care to deal with, no clue how many thousands of tons. I haven’t bothered to refine it properly yet since it’s such a drag, so there is quite a load, but at the end quite a huge chunk of it would disappear in the process, so I’ve just been stockpiling it and ended up with quite a pile. I wonder if scattering all this from the sky would count as some kind of 『Meteor Rain (Illegal Rubble Dumping)』 skill?

Well, even so, at first, I couldn’t even mine 1,000 tons, but now my detection range expanded, so I keep finding stuff, and with the massive increase in MP battery capacity, I can dig and mine as much as I please. Above all, my magic control has improved, letting me dig faster while spending way less MP. Even with just over a month, I’ve come a long way. Still, I feel like I was mining iron back then too because I didn’t have any money? Why is it that only that part hasn’t improved at all? Truly baffling?

And so I continued digging and scanning, slowly collecting what I managed to find. The tunnel ended up much deeper than planned, but still no major reaction… Hm? It’s not mithril, and the amount is small, but the reaction is strong? It’s not black iron either. A strong response that doesn’t match any of the other unknown metals I’ve found so far.

「Why is there a treasure chest?! Like, an actual buried treasure chest?! Well, I call it a treasure chest, but it’s more like a stone coffin, but there’s a signal coming from it, so something’s inside? I mean, this isn’t even a Dungeon, I’m literally just making a tunnel, did I accidentally dig my way somewhere I wasn’t supposed to? Well, I found it, so I guess it came to me?」

After promptly digging it out I opened the chest. If there’s nothing valuable inside, this whole day might end up being a total waste of effort. Well, in terms of raw value, I did get a decent amount of gold and silver, and I dug up more iron and copper than I care to see again. Even the mithril, when you total it up, probably adds up to about as much as that big golem from the other day. But still, coming all the way out here to dig and not finding a single large vein feels like a defeat somehow? It’s like, there is no resolution, no satisfying conclusion? And a Highschool Boy is a creature that gets all anxious and bothered when there is no satisfying end!

When I opened it, inside was a snake. A hissing snake that began quickly growing in size. Yep, it’s definitely not a jackpot. This snake’s not something I could sell to the general store or the weapon shop, and it’s clearly not a piece of equipment. Sure, I’m not against the idea of a beautiful woman all elegantly entwined in some sultry and glossy snake gear, but this one is way closer not to equipping the snake as to being attacked by it? Yeah, I’m sure that’s what’s happening. Also, I’m pretty sure this treasure chest is also not a treasure chest, no idea if this this box was a trap or a sealing container or what, but there was a piece of paper stuck to it with the word 『Seal』 written on it? Come on, who wouldn’t open a box that says 『Seal』 on it? If you really don’t want people opening it, then don’t write that! It just makes one want to open it!

The large piercing round that I launched with a quickdraw Fire Bullet bounced off its scales. I’m trying to freeze it too, but that doesn’t seem to have any effect, and it clearly isn’t responding to my clever, witty otherworldly jokes either! Slime-san was jiggling and bouncing with laughter, but this snake’s got zero sense of humor.

The snake continues to grow, swelling as if to block the narrow tunnel, and ne, shrinking the tunnel in return. Yep, this was just a side branch I dug to pick up the treasure chest anyway, so it’s not like I need this part of the tunnel anyway? For a while, the snake was stuck, writhing in pain, then its growth halted, and it began to shrink back down. But I kept shrinking the tunnel too. Thus began our endless competition of miniaturization. Eventually, 『Hydra Level 100』shrank down to the size of a regular small snake, at which point I grabbed its heads and captured it. Turns out it’s pretty dumb, huh?

But as I was holding its head to keep it from biting me, another head sprouted and went to attack me! Panicking, I quickly grabbed that one with my other hand, and then, boop, another head, so I used tentacles to grab that one Fufufu, I don’t get bitten every day for nothing, you know? Wait, another one, the moment a new head appears, my magical hands are there to grab it. Trying to beat me in a tentacle battle? Oh, you sweet summer child, so sweet in fact, I’m almost tempted to bottle you with syrup and sell as 『Sweet Hydra』!

(Jiggle-Jiggle)

「Eh? Are you saying you are gonna eat Sweet Hydra-san? Wait, no? Ohhh, maybe you were like a co-worker from your Dungeon Master days? In that case, wouldn’t you have loads to talk about? Should I call your old bosses, the Dungeon Emperor-sans, for a reunion? Actually, how about a banquet? We could just go dive into whatever Dungeon your old colleagues are in and throw the party there?」

(Bounce-Bounce)

Even if you’re saying no, I have no idea which part you’re denying? Maybe not a colleague, but a junior? Looks like the Dungeon Master World has a pretty strict hierarchical culture, with some physical education involved. Do they rough up their juniors or something? Is this power harassment? If it was sexual harassment, then I’d willing to give joining a forthcoming consideration, but this isn’t even a cute Lamia girl, it’s just a plain snake (Hydra). Harassing that doesn’t sound fun at all? Just in case, I tried petting it, but yeah, not that fun.

That said, both Armored Pres-san and Dancing Girl-san are very familiar with the snake-type tentacle aberrations, writhing and arching their backs in absolute ecstasy. So I figured maybe it is secretly kind of fun? So I tried petting it some more, but no, not really?

But I was quite moved by the sight of that glistening, smooth, supple skin wrapped in the snake’s coils and the way it pressed and squeezed around the sensual flesh, so I decided to treat Snake-san gently. I also spotted quite a few individuals resembling Centipede-san, Slug-san, and Sea Anemone-san, but I’ll just pretend I didn’t see them. That said, they also had them writhing and trembling with shrieks of delight, so maybe I should treat them more nicely too? There are just too many kinds of aberrations, and dealing with all these monsters is starting to seem like a real social chore. Memorizing all their names alone feels like a nightmare?

Jiggle-Jiggling Slime-san extended a slime tentacle and touched the necklace on my neck. Aah,『Serpent Tamer’s Necklace – INT +40% Up, Snake Replication (x3, generated from own body via MP), Venom Creation, Scale Hardening, +DEF, 7 Slots』 , so it wants me to replicate it? It didn’t say anything back when with the Rock Snakes? So this Hydra Snake-san gets a recommendation?

The Rock Snake was, well, just rock. This snake (Hydra) has multiple heads and can change size? In terms of function, it’s closer to tentacles, but I can already sprout tentacles, am I to add snakes into the mix as well? Then again, both Armored Pres-san and Dancing Girl-san were extremely pleased with the reptilian-type aberrant tentacle-san variants, so if I add more, they’ll definitely be overjoyed.

「Ahhh, I see, Slime-san, you are a villain too~ Hah hah hah hah hah」 (Jiggle-Jiggle, Jiggle-Jiggle)

We laughed together for a moment. It’s tradition, after all.

So with that, I tried replicating it, but I didn’t actually know how, so I just focused on it mentally, and 『Hydra Lv 100』 vanished as if being absorbed and turned into a magic stone. Let’s see…『Hydra – ViT +30%, HP Boost, Scale Armor, Head-Multiplication, Gigantification, Extremely Lethal Poison, Deadly Venom, Instant Death, Inflicts Various Status Ailments, Auto-Recovery Healing, Regeneration, Automatic Attack & Defense, +ATT』, wait, it turned into equipment! This allows treating all three Hydras as equippable gear and grants me their effects. And since the base necklace already had『7 slots』 it became an even better deal with the three extra snake items added.

With the ViT and HP bonuses enhancing my body, and the Auto-Healing and Regeneration repairing it, this is perfect anti-self-destruction gear. This Snake-san was ideal for keeping my body from falling apart, that’s why Slime-san recommended it to me. And then there’s that fourth effect of 『Inflicts various status ailments』, and, damn, it’s is really getting out of hand. Stacking just three debuffs made them convulse and fly off just from light tickling, so the fourth… they’ll collapse just from some petting. I’ll have to hold back, or just stroking them might instantly end things. Actually, if they can’t even pass out, they might just keep endlessly climaxing forever? Wow, they sure are having it tough, huh?

「Uwoahhh, snakes coming out!!」

But this automatic control function is surprisingly useful? Since I don’t have to bother with managing each snake myself? I mean, I haven’t been able to use magic threads or magic hands properly while teleporting at high speed because I can’t control them, but if the snakes can move on their own, I can just leave them in autosnaking mode and keep doing my own stuff? Well, the snakes might freak out at first from sudden teleporting, but more attacks is a good thing. When going against raw numbers, you need more attacks per second. So I’m happy to borrow even a snake’s hand. Though if it’s feet, that’s 『snake legs』, which would be pointless? Well, putting aside any 『Wouldn’t that make it a lizard?』 retorts, it’s still appreciated? I guess?

「Thank you, Slime-san! Here, have an apple pie with a golden crust? I guess?」

(Jiggle-Jiggle～!)

Looks like it’s satisfied. Armored Pres-san and Dancing Girl-san will be thrilled too, so it’s a win-win all around. A bucket-sized trial version of apple pie is a small price to pay. I guess it really was obvious that I’ve been breaking bit by bit.