Chapter 491: Unclean Passage

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Translator: Nat


–Aegir POV–

Malt Capital – Biado.

The third attack commenced.

The commander――or more accurately speaking, the chief of a village somewhere――gives orders to the group.

「Her Majesty Celestina is watching! We’re going to recapture Biado in splendid fashion and receive words of praise! Those who contribute greatly may even get headpats!」

「「「Uoooooh!!」」」

The accompanying soldiers――or more accurately speaking, villagers wielding farm tools and wooden mallets――respond to the village chief’s call and rush towards Biado while letting out an energetic war cry.

「There they go.」

Christoph mutters.

「Third wave attack, archers step forward.」

「Third row volley. Loose at a one second interval!」

「Crossbows aim at your respective targets.」

Precise shooting from above the city walls greet the surging volunteer soldiers.

「「「Uwaaaaaaah!!」」」

The villagers immediately turn 180 degrees and run back to where they came.

「And here they come.」

Christoph mutters again.

I told them from the start not to go, but they kept insisting on wanting to show off their good sides to Celestina so I let them.

As predicted, they were only spirited until they were actually shot at.
It wasn’t a matter of military training or formation.
The volley did not defeat the commander or cause the collapse of the ranks.
The soldiers ran away just because arrows stabbed into their shields or fell nearby or another reason of their own creation, leading to the overall collapse.

「It’s a problem that existed before the fight. South Yuguria made the right choice not recruiting these guys.」

Fortunately, because the first attack scattered them, the actual damage done was pretty insignificant.
It’s also a good thing that the enemy can’t leave the city right now, since even if the others were elite troops, they would have been wiped out in a highly contested situation.

Cheers erupt from the Malt citizens who ran back in tears.
It’s probably because Celestina rushed over with bandages.

Those who appeared uninjured also dropped to the ground, receiving treatment on their backs with a solemn expression as if they fought hard and fruitlessly exhausted themselves. In reality, they just wanted to impress Celestina.

Meanwhile, Sekrit is taking a nap because she didn’t want to watch an attack she already knew the result of.

I wonder if it’s the presence of the Malt people that, despite the gruesome nature of a battlefield, a certain relaxed atmosphere is in the air.

「With that said, this is no time to be laughing foolishly.」

As it turned out, our plan was progressing extremely well.

The enemy fell for the Vandolea volunteer army diversion and most of their forces garrisoned in Biado had been lured out.
We took advantage of that to approach Biado practically in a straight line, and we are currently already deployed outside the city walls.

Cities and villages along the way that saw Celestina met up with us or agreed to cooperate fully without hesitation.
A total of 5000 true volunteer soldiers joined with our core of 400 disguised volunteer soldiers, and each village worked together to seal off key roads with wood or rubble, broke the waterways, and chopped down bridges, making it almost impossible for South Yuguria to act.

Consequently, the approximately 1000 soldiers stationed in Biado are completely isolated and faced with no hopes of reinforcements, however……

「They can be really stubborn.」

Christoph reacted to my monologue, so I had to restate those words in falsetto to which he averted his eyes.
If we think about how we attracted four fifths of the entire garrison army with the diversion, the plan is a big success.
Not to mention, as an army of about 5000 and taking into account the enemy’s walls, we should be at a major disadvantage.

「This is harsh.」

This joke of an attack was a disaster.

The first one also acted as scouting.

The second was a real attempt with the core elites in the front, but they were easily repelled.

Now, the main force has been caught in a diversion, barely any troops are left in the city, the Malt rebel army appears in that gap, and the likelihood of reinforcements is slim to none.
With all those conditions lined up, normally the enemy would abandon the city and run or surrender.
However, they are calmly putting up resistance and giving us quite a hard time since we don’t have siege weapons.

「They’re persisting so unnecessarily.」

Christoph looked over at me when he said that so I had to agree in falsetto, which prompted him to take a half step away from me.

Presently, time is not on our side.
Although the roads are blocked, as long as the Malt citizens are useless, the return of a few hundred troops from remote areas is enough to reverse the situation.

More importantly, they wouldn’t be able to avoid public execution like Celestina was hoping for. Execution may not be possible for us now, but it’ll probably be done all at once to set an example once a stalemate occurs.

I think she was Mary from the clothing store.
From what she told me, she belongs to me so I can’t let her be killed meaninglessly.

「We need a breakthrough?」

I stare at the walls where the enemy soldiers are standing guard.

Based on what I have seen of the people’s attitude towards Celestina, once Celestina passes the walls and the people of Biado see her face, the battle will be settled.
If everyone revolts together, a mere thousand soldiers won’t be able to maintain control.

「Oh wait, I recall a few hundred was able to suppress ten thousand……」

Nevertheless, we can successfully storm in if things become chaotic enough.

We just need to get into the city by any means necessary.

Having said that, it won’t be easy when we have no time for preliminary arrangements.
It’s not like we can tie Celestina to a kite and wave her around.

「Secret path……a secret passage……a hidden tunnel……」

「Um……if I may interrupt-」

The one who spoke up in a reserved voice was Monica.

「There is a secret path.」

Monica tugs my hand and walks toward a wet swamp area that many people likely haven’t gone near.

「There are two secret paths to Biado. The first is located past the barley field and is relatively new, but it probably can’t be used.」

「Why not?」

「Successive kings have said the road is too narrow and leaks from rain so they repeatedly and proudly renovated it, and even constructed a splendid building on the city-side exit, so we’ll be spotted right away. Everyone, including the citizens, know about the place, meaning the enemy will surely be waiting for us if we take it.」

That’s not much of a secret.

「The other one existed since the time Biado was built, and is one unknown to the public, as well as royalty or high ranking nobles. The reason I know about it is because the previous king specifically passed the information down to me in case anything happened to Her Majesty Celestina.」

This is the real secret passage.

Monica searches around restlessly for something that resembles the entrance when she reaches the bog, but struggles due to all the rampant vegetation.
This might be her first time actually checking the outside of the city in person.

「By the way, where does this swamp exit? We have to coordinate with those on the outside so they can lead the enemy away to ensure we aren’t discovered.」

「You don’t have to worry about that. The exit will be in the centre of Biado, directly inside the palace.」

I go silent for a second.
Simultaneously, Monica finds the entrance.
Its diameter is about 1 m and there is a dull-colored perforated lid covering the hole, which matches with the mud surrounding it, perfectly camouflaging it.
Monica attempts to pull open the heavy-looking lid, but it doesn’t budge because of the rust.

「It’s a bit late now, but I wish you mentioned it earlier if such a passage existed. We could have finished this battle in one try if we attacked through――」

I comment as I assist Monica with the lid.
In that moment, my complaint tapered off into nothing.

「This is……」

A foul smell immediately hit my nose as soon as the lid opened and the mud slid off.
No, that isn’t mud.

「I heard it was a path purely to allow somebody to escape with no regard to the level of comfort. Of course, I had never actually gone inside. I believe no one has used it in over a hundred years. From what I’ve read in books, it’s a……well……sewage drain.」

I look up to the sky and ponder my choices.
However, this seems to be the only option.

「Alright, let’s go.」

「「「「……」」」」

Me and the soldiers with elevated morale stand before the passage.
Nobody pointed out my tone. No one could afford to with the scene in front of their eyes.

「Hey get going. The heart of the enemy base is beyond this point, in other words, this is a hole to victory.」

The number of accompanying soldiers was limited to five.
We obviously don’t want the enemy to detect our movements and bringing a large group into an environment where it’s clearly impossible to move is the height of foolishness.

Sekrit and Brynhildr planned to tag along, but when they saw where I’d be going, Sekrit blatantly lied that she wasn’t feeling well, and Brynhildr disappeared with a pale face before I knew it.

「You say it’s a hole to victory, but it’s just a sewer. Furthermore, it’s not an old one…… it’s still in use.」

I kick the grumbling Christoph in the back and have him lead the charge.

「Captain, I will always stay by your side!!」

The pretty-eyed Guigue was next to follow. I think he’s gone a little crazy.

「Seriously……? Uueeh.」
「The special bonus……doesn’t seem worth it.」
「This smelly, dirty feeling, I don’t hate it.」

The other three soldiers also enter with a sigh.

After confirming I had my nose plug in place, I turned around.
There, the fully ready Monica and Celestina were waiting.

「We’ve prepared ourselves, it’s better if you two stop. This isn’t a place where girls should go.」

「The interior contains a multitude of branches and also varies in height. Do you think you can reach the exit without someone who has seen the map like me?」

That would be impossible. If Monica doesn’t come, we’ll get lost in the cesspool.

Celestina, on the other hand, is the one who shouldn’t come.
She should accompany the outside squad and run in only after we sneak into the palace and create a disturbance――

「I’m going too.」

Celestina pulls a hood snugly on her head.

「I’m. Going.」

Celestina follows the soldiers into the sewer after repeating herself.

「……fine.」

I guess there’s no arguing about it.
I can’t say no when she has that look in her eyes.

「Defiling such a cute king will likely have the opposite effect and provoke animosity though.」

Before the girl who has made up her mind could stick her foot into the filthy water, I pick her up.
Sorry Monica, you’re going to have to get dirty like the rest of us.

The stench and sensation of the sludge reaching up to my thighs is unbearable beyond imagination.

Moreover, everytime an area is illuminated with a torch, there always seems to be some insect or rat skittering away.

Out of concern for us, who naturally became silent in the worst imaginable environment, the flustered Celestina tried talking to the soldiers from my shoulders.

「You are handsome. Once you arrive at the city, surely you’ll be popular.」

「If Your Majesty says so, I’ll have more confidence in myself. Ehe……I may look like this, but I’m actually two-timing.」

「Ah, you’re a bad boy! You’ll get a spanking later!」

Her cute way of speech triggers some chuckles.

「You have an average face, but you look like an honest man. Is my insight correct?」

「Hahaha, you’re right. This idiot got tricked by a woman last year. This year he was deceived by a swindler. And finally he gets taken for a ride by a shiny boss and ends up going in the sewer for bonus money!」

Laughter fills the air for several seconds.

「And you……」

We progress through the sewers in a surprisingly cheerful mood, brightened by the sunshine smile that won’t dim even in the darkest of environments.

「You seem really strong with all those bulging muscles! You must be a warrior who has made quite a name for himself.」

「Y-you think so? Ehehe, that must be true then. Maybe it’s time I come up with a nickname for myself――」

As I was about to point out Celestina’s incorrect examination, I felt a chill on my neck and swung my sword directly behind me.

I hear a sharp shriek and then something bump into the wall before falling into the sewage water.

One of the soldiers and Guigue shine their torches in the direction of the noise and draw their swords, moving to defend Monica and Celestina one short pause later, and then Christoph draws his sword after another pause.

With his sword still at the ready, one of the soldiers picked up the thing I slashed.

That thing which was squealing while bleeding was……

「A rat……?」

Everyone heaved a collective sigh of relief and some even grumbled.

「Haaa, that scared me.」

「Geez, don’t freak out over a rat. It’s not something a big name should cry about.」

However, I don’t laugh if off or calm down.

「Don’t lower your guard. It’s not a normal rat.」

「Huh? But……」

The rat in the soldier’s hand with blood dripping from its mouth is a normal rat.
That’s why I feel it’s impossible. I sensed the strike from behind and ‘cut its head off’.

「Geh! This thing has two heads――!?」

Something reacts to the soldier’s yell and glows in the darkness.
Yes, it was a swarm of rats.

I entrust Celestina to Monica and assume a defensive stance with my sword.

「Damn, they’re the size of dogs!」

「They have two heads……wait, there are some with three heads!」

「Don’t treat them like rats! They’re more like monsters!」

I swing my sword at the incoming multi-headed rat.

I slice one that leaps at me in half, punch another and stomp on one that tries to bite my leg.
The soldiers, except for Christoph, are all capable enough to not be done in by rats that are just a little bigger than normal.
The creatures are taken out one by one by spear, sword and crossbow, but……

「It’s dark and our footing is bad! Not to mention it’s narrow here and there’s no space to move left or right!」

「They don’t die immediately after their heads are cut off. Gouge deep into their bodies!」

「If you get bitten by these dirty rats, your wounds will get infected and you won’t survive! The only way is to defeat them without getting hurt!」

Under the assumption of having to trek through the sludge, the soldiers were armed with their usual weapons, but the armor they were wearing was of the light leather kind.
The possibility of the thin layer being penetrated by the fangs of dog-sized rats is high.

Furthermore, unlike humanoid enemies like other people and goblins, rats can crawl on the walls and ceiling of cramped spaces.
It’s imperative to pay attention to overhead attacks in addition to attacks from the side or the front. Inevitably, blind spots also widen.

「……this isn’t the time for me to worry about maintain my disguise.」

I grab Christoph’s sword and switch to dual-wielding.

「Eh, won’t that make me unarmed……?」

I step in front of the soldiers and lower my stance.
The multi-headed rats concentrate their attacks on me.

「Just because you rats grew an additional head or two――」

I wait until the last second for the rats to get as close as possible and swing my swords right and left, mowing them down.

Blood splatters as three rats get cut into pieces and their limbs fall into the filthy water.

「They’re coming from above!!」

「I know.」

I include up and down in my list of sword trajectories.
Several rats turn into chopped meat and scatter around me.

If I let my swords hit the stone directly, they’ll break, so I keep my swings barely within the limits of the ceiling and the walls.
Countless sparks light up the vicinity temporarily.

「Incredible……it’s like his sword is creating a barrier. Not a single one has passed through.」

「This ridiculous strength……I knew it, it has to be him.」

I interrupt the soldiers with a shout.

「No time for chatter, look down at my feet! I can’t defend there.」

Right, the problem comes from those that slip into the sludge and attack from below.
It’s not possible to slash through the water and stomping on each one will cause me to lose balance.

「Got it!!」

The soldiers stop paying attention to their overhead and flank positions and fixate on my legs instead.
The moment something starts to rise from the sludge, the soldiers stick their swords or spears in that spot.

After that, we just have to endure until all of them die or they give up.

About 30 or 40 kills pile up and things felt like they would end soon until-

「Sorya! Crap, it has four heads. It’s not dying, it slipped past!!」

A rat with a spear still stabbed in one of its head runs under my legs.
Its destination is where Celestina and Monica are, but if I were to turn around and save them, all the rats in front of me will be free.

「Leave it to me!!」

That is when the empty-handed Christoph pounces at the rat.
As expected, even the monster rat did not have the strength to push the weight of the muscular Christoph, and both of them sank into the sludge.

「Well done, Christoph!」

「I’ve also grown too! Wait a minute, this thing is strong, ah don’t, uwaaaah!!」

However, that is where Christoph’s contributions end as the rat leans forward and tries to bite him.

「Yaaa!」

At that moment, Monica, who held her knife ready at the hip, rammed the blade into the vitals of the creature, dealing a fatal blow and killing the multi-headed rat on the spot.

Coincidentally, that is also when the other rats in front of me decided they’ve had enough, ending the attack.

「Are you alright?」

Celestina wipes the face of the sludge-covered Christoph with a high quality handkerchief.

「Wait, it’s dirty……now your handkerchief is ruined.」

But Celestina wraps her hands around the dirty Christoph’s face and she smiles.

「Thank you.」

「……of course, my king.」

I grab Christoph by the back of the collar and pull him up.
‘My king’, my ass. What a simpleton.

In any case, everyone seems to be uninjured and just dirty.

「Hey, is it going to be like this from this point on?」

We’re prepared to get messy, but for monsters to appear……and not the standard goblins or zombies at that, is a little unexpected.

「It’s a place that hasn’t been used in a hundred years after all.」

It is said that monsters spawn more easily in stagnant places.
For this area that is dark, unclean and sealed for a hundred years, it might be considered the perfect breeding ground.

「I’m sure there are more of them.」

I sigh and face forward.

「At the very least, we’re going in correct direction, right?」

「………………yes.」

Come on. I’m really counting on you here.

Fortunately, we didn’t encounter a swarm of rats later and were able to progress relatively smoothly in spite of occasionally taking the wrong path.

「Dear brother……I want you to lower me. I want to walk on my own two feet.」

「I can’t. If you walk in such a place, you’ll become muddy.」

I am already calf-deep in sludge.
Taking into account Celestina’s small stature, she’ll surely be submerged up to the waist.

「But everyone is doing their best, I can’t be the only one……」

I make a sterner face than usual.

Honestly, wanting to share the joys and sorrows with the soldiers is merely Celestina’s desire, and there is nothing to be gained by the soldiers.
What everyone wishes for is her smile that beams down like the sun, not a girl who sweats beside them.

「Your Majesty, please store that feeling of wanting to be with your citizens and soldiers within your heart, and never forget it.」

Celestina nods at Monica’s words and returns to my shoulders.

「Shh-!」

All of a sudden, a person’s face appears from around the corner in front of us.

I scowled more so than I did with the rats.

「We got found out……?」

This just became tough. If a guard was stationed, that means our infiltration was anticipated.
Even if we defeat this enemy, there will be more waiting for us at the exit. Breaking through will be difficult.

However, the enemy doesn’t let out an alarmed shout or run off, he seems to be staying still with his head swaying from side to side.

「Something feels off. What is going on here?」

It happened when a soldier threw his torch at the enemy.

The enemy’s face stretched up toward the ceiling.

「His neck will stretch――no, wait!」

There was no neck.
What’s there instead is a black glossy body and numerous legs growing out from there……

「It’s a gigantic centipede!!」

「A human-faced centipede!? Uggh, this is definitely going to show up in my dreams!」

The mouth part of the human-faced part splits open with a peculiar noise and fangs protrude.

「Celestina, close your eyes.」

Although its strength level is unknown, the shock level of its appearance is top class.
It isn’t something a little girl should see.

However, a courageous voice responds from atop my shoulders.

「I’m looking! I’m not going to avert my eyes! You’ll allow me to do that much, won’t you!?」

Fumu, she’s saying that while her legs are trembling, impressive.

「You guys, clean this up quickly. Don’t let Her Majesty look at this unsightly creature any longer.」

「「「Yeaah!!」」」

Everyone is in agreement.

Using the power of teamwork and the opening created when the centipede tried to prey on Christoph when he was tangled up, we were able to finish off the centipede without anyone getting wounded.

Afterwards, we also encountered and defeated a fly monster, a giant worm, and something like an evolution form of a gross insect.
Either way, they were all disgusting creatures, so when skeletons finally showed up, everyone smiled and broke them apart happily.

Through all the fighting, Celestina did not look away despite the enemies being a bunch of repulsive creatures and she continued watching from Monica’s shoulders――although she did turn around with Monica when the larger version of the familiar guest of the kitchen appeared, but that much can be forgiven.

「If we go up this slope, we’ll diverge from the sewers and enter the royal palace――hiih.」

Monica, who was leading the way and felt relieved after leaving the sewage, shrieked and stopped in place.

I follow where her gaze ends.
It’s a mass of some kind, yes that’s the best way to describe it.
A shiver runs down my spine.

「Step back, you two――go three times as far as before. If you think it’s too far, that should be about right.」

We already left the sewers so our feet are no longer in the sludge.
Nevertheless, the foul stench is several times stronger than before.

There was a sticky slurp sound and then the masses spread on the ground slowly began to gather into a pile.

It has no eyes, no nose, and no mouth. In the first place, I couldn’t even tell where its face or torso is and from where to where is considered its ‘body’

「Guh……」
「Ueeh……」

Being exposed so long to the smell of sewage should have numbed our noses, but the putrid smell is enough to make our noses fall off.

「What……is that?」

「Hell if I know. All I can tell is that it’s extremely dirty, stinky……and bad.」

The pieces distributed all over the floor have collected into a single mass.

An object that looks like a huge warm jelly with all the filth of the world jammed into it glides toward me.
It’s clear I am its aim.

「I don’t want to be near it or touch it, much less fight it……」

Sadly, our destination is behind this thing.
And this thing’s blobby body is reaching the ceiling and the walls so slipping past is not an option.

「We’ll have to defeat it.」

I hold my sword with two hands.
Alarm bells are ringing loudly in my head, but there is unfortunately no other way.


Protagonist: Aegir Hardlett. 25 years old. Autumn.
Status: Goldonia Kingdom Margrave. Great Feudal Lord of Eastern Area. Mountain Legend.
Friend of the Dwarves. Friend of the King of Aless. Dragon Slayer Hero.
Elf Mediator. Sex King of White City. Mad Demon God
Condition (Hero of Salvation, Golden Lager – Dirty)
Travel Companions:
Sekrit (feigned illness), Brynhildr (withdrawn), Christoph (Malt’s loyal retainer), Guigue (pretty?)
Celestina (queen), Monica (attendant), Busco (temporary commander)

Eastern Region
Friendly Troops: Malt Volunteer Army (fake): 380 ⇒ 350
Malt Volunteer Army (real): 5000 ⇒ 4980
Vandolea Military Volunteers: 4850 ⇒ 4750 (war of attrition)
Enemy Troops: Biado Garrison: 1000 ⇒ 995
Field Army: 4000 ⇒ 3900

Assets: -68 000 gold
Sexual Partners: 799
Children who have been born: 70 + 567
Current Location: Biado sewer system


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