Translator: “Pink Tea” Editor: ”Ryunakama”
Day 41 – Evening, White Weirdo Inn
It was revealed when everyone was reporting today’s finds from their respective dungeon surveys.
Since listening to him usually doesn’t bring any good, we put off his report, and so, for closure, we ended up listening to an absurd person that never makes sense. Of course, his story didn’t betray our expectations, and was absurd, making no sense whatsoever.
It appears that he killed the dungeon that he went to inspect. Or rather, flooded it.
The person that committed the inundation testified 『I kind of flooded it?』. Kind of, he says.
And then, he made no confirmation or follow-up check, stating as the reason 『Well, it’s damp in there, chests can wait until tomorrow, right?』, and went back just like that.
「And? Did you drain the water before going back?」
「Yes, so I have to return there tomorrow. Aquatic monsters should still remain there, and I think undead also didn’t die? Probably?」
Looks like the new dungeon at a nice spot not so far from the town didn’t match Haruka-kun’s criteria, so he flooded it with river water, killing the dungeon and its dungeon master. Though half of the story was about BBQ?
After that, followed a talk about humidity, discomfort levels, mold, and water damage?
It seems that he is seeing dungeons through the prism of construction.
What we are seeing is an issue with Haruka-kun though?
An issue with his criteria for dungeons.
And then there is that dungeon master, that died without us finding out even their species or even seeing their face.
By the way, Haruka-kun’s friends, who knew him for a long time, commented 『I knew he’d do it one of these days』.
Not even one person could be found saying 『Never thought he’d do such a thing』. Because everyone knew he would do it eventually! And he, after all, did it!
Even the reason he didn’t enter the dungeon 『It’s wet, and damp in there.』? I’d really want to press him – just who was that person that flooded it in the first place! But it’s probably useless?
「I mean, imagine having an entrance at such low height, right beside a river? Of course, I will flood it? Anyone would? Even Toyotomi-san would agree? I guess?」
Is what the perpetrator claims, so it is almost certain that he will soon repeat this offense, not reflecting at all. And as for Toyotomi-san, he actually advised a capitulation and ended the affair by accepting opponents’ surrender? It’s only Haruka-kun who would suddenly flood the place with water, annihilate everything without any warning, and then go home without even checking the results!
Rather than wasting time, seeking common sense from Haruka-kun, it would be better to come up with some kind of sensible explanation for the guild. That certainly would be much wiser.
After all, it is me who always ends up explaining everything.
To begin with, it would’ve been fine to tell him off since he is not an adventurer and thus shouldn’t even enter dungeons, but since he killed it without taking a step inside… Does it technically make him innocent?
Beside him, Angelica-san is making foreigner-like 『good grief』gestures, as if it doesn’t concern her at all, but you are an accomplice, okay?! Just a short while ago she was saying stuff like 『I will follow him to the bitter end!』, deeply moving all of the girls, so why is she acting like she has nothing to do with this?
She should’ve had a lot of responsibility at the previous ex-Dungeon Emperor position, so I had high hopes for her, certain that we can entrust handling Haruka-kun to her… But come to think of it, she also irresponsibly ditched the Dungeon Emperor post. Teaming up with Haruka-kun she destroyed that dungeon, and today she helped him destroy another one. Yeah, Angelica-san appears like a common-sense person, but actually is his accomplice.
And for the dinner we had croquettes. Presented with those freshly fried, hot, and crispy crockets both boys and girls made a huge uproar, scrambling to get the first serving. Everyone was beside themselves, completely forgetting about the sermon and everything, eating until they got sick from overeating. That’s dangerous! We must not forget that potatoes are the natural enemy of girls!
Apparently, he got a huge volume of potatoes from the village. And it seems he also bought as many potatoes as he could. This is the specialty of that nearby village, but the popularity doesn’t seem to have spread to other places, so they were troubled, unable to sell a huge stock they had. Both Haruka-kun and the villagers were overjoyed with him buying up their whole stock.
「You see? There is a point to sightseeing as well? Trading is also important? And also records of agricultural information? I’m sure even Marco-san would’ve been impressed with my observations? 」
And so he kept bragging, talking about the farm village, and with the talks about the village and croquettes, the matter with the dungeon was completely forgotten. Yeah, looks like the dungeon really was killed just incidentally, while he was at it.
I mean, more than half of the remaining story was about potatoes. The first half was BBQ, the second half potatoes. During the course of a long, long story of today’s events, the only line about the dungeon was『I kind of flooded it?』.
Just in case we also tried to get testimony from his accomplice, Angelica-san, but all we got is her awkwardly and yet happily saying stuff like「The scenery was beautiful」, or 「I never tried barbeque before, but it was very delicious」, or 「I tried grilling meat for the first time」, or 「Cold river in such nice weather felt really good」and so on, just speaking joyfully. Yeah, looks like they were just having a picnic. Well, good for them?
What we managed to understand is that while the newly made dungeon lot he went to see was very shabby, the nearby village was nice and had a lot of potatoes, so the trip was worth it.
And that the person that went with him enjoyed the picnic, and is very happy about today.
And also, the dungeon was destroyed through flooding.
I guess that’s all? I wonder if the guild will be fine with this? Will the lord understand what they are talking about when they report this to him?
Even so, the meeting was over.
And the lecture on the outrageously outrageous matter with the dungeon was avoided. Everyone had their mouths sealed with sweet potatoes. Potatoes are girls’ enemy!
Yeah, one more set?[TL Notes:
 Toyotomi Hideyoshi was a Japanese samurai and daimyō of the late Sengoku period regarded as the second “Great Unifier” of Japan.
 Marco Polo, Venetian merchant of XIII’s century most famous for his travel records.