Translator: “Pink Tea” Editor: ”Ryunakama”
Day 55 – Morning, White Weirdo Inn.
Today we are challenging the 50th floor with everyone. After that we are going to have a day off, so let’s get done with this quickly. This time, I’m coming as a spectating instructor plus a hidden room spotter plus support in case of emergency. That’s a very busy NEET for ya!
「This dungeon had lots of flying monsters, so look out for airborne enemies! Bird-types were the main! Most of them were weak to either physical or magic attacks, so don’t rush to blindly attack them, and properly discern their weakness!」
It seems that here, they already explored all the way to the 49th floor, with the Bitches clearing the way. However, with the sword users being the core of the party, flying monsters should’ve been difficult to deal with. Just how did they beat them? Did they perhaps bite them?
「It’s expected that I’ll have nothing to do with 32 people present since I had nothing to do even with just 3 people, but why do I get busier hour by hour despite not getting to do anything? Sort of?」
(Nod, nod) (Jiggle, jiggle)
Even Armored Pres-san, whose conversation ability devolved to the level of Slime-san, agreed by nodding. However, chasing canaries in a cave like this might get animal activists pissed off. They look cute. With their fluffy round bodies they look like small chicks, I’d like to have some as pets, but they also happen to have 『Deadly Poison』. They’ll peck at you, making you go『Aww, how cute~』, and the next moment you are dead, it’s a trap! I almost grabbed one myself!
And since they have 『Cooperation』and attack in groups, they are quite a trouble. They fly away, hide, and shoot poison spears out of their mouths from behind at their victims. There is nothing cute about what they do, but they look adorable. Still, pecking canaries are much better than crazy biting bitches! Isn’t there 『Swap』skill somewhere? Not going to say that aloud though. Since they’ll bite me.
Acting as a spearhead, the Bitches charge ahead, scattering the enemies with mid-ranged magic. Shooting『Wind Blades』randomly and obstructing the flight with wind magic, they go around, cutting the birdies down. It’s not terribly inventive, but it’s effective nonetheless. All 5 are elite Lv 99 by now. At the same time, they aren’t pressing too far ahead, minding their distance with the rearguard.
And compared to that, the Idiots simply keep endlessly chasing the enemies all over the place? They are again running on the walls, chasing the bird into the ceiling and generally leaping through the place. Are they actually mobs? How are they so stupid? Why are they like this right after being told to be careful about flying enemies? Didn’t they do the same thing when they fought the bugs? Why do they keep running after them despite having Lightning and other skills? Are they dogs? Is this perhaps an instinct? Let’s try throwing them a bone next time.
And the Great Sage-san, who was wielding large-scale extermination spells during the practice is currently bludgeoning the enemies? The swings from that giant thing she claims to be a staff, which looks like nothing but a huge hammer, merge into one tempest of pain. And her other stuff is swinging around too!
The pres seems to have either changed to a tank, or it’s anything goes for her, but at the moment she is fighting with a great shield and a sword. Is she trying to perfect the all-rounder style? Is she wearing side-tie frills after all? No, I didn’t say anything? Please, fight looking forward? You are going to get pecked?
The『Spear Canaries Lv23』 of the 23th floor perished looking cute and lovely.
But it was so wicked. From beginning to the end, the spear canaries were under the effect of illusions meddling with their sense of balance, and with their ability for flight hindered they were mercilessly hunted down. This is the expertise area of the culture clubs’ girls. It’s extremely troublesome if one fails to resist this. Is she wearing a thong right now? I heard she actually put it on? Is this for real?
Proceeding smoothly is nice, but there is too much of a contrast between whether they get to have things go their way or not.
However, they are moving in the right direction. Go hard on those weaker than you, grind, raise levels, and strike. This is a simple and easy approach, so it comes free of mistakes.
The problem is Lv 100 breakthrough. if the condition was to beat a floor master, it should’ve been cleared back at the great dungeon. Or do they need to beat more than one? Or maybe the issue is in the fact that they beat it all together? Well, the only way to verify it is to keep beating bosses. After all, I have no means to confirm any of that myself. I have to level up 78 more times to catch up with them. There is no chance for me to reach Lv 100 unless I destroy this entire world, you know?
「I’ll go check the hidden room, okay? I’ll be done while you are picking magic stones, it’s totally not like I’m going to slack off? Honestly. Definitely not. I mean, I’m beginning to think so, then it must be the case? Probably? Soo, there are treasure chests awaiting me! Kind of?」
Numerous magic stones are scattered all over the place, so gathering all of them should be a pain. But since there are 29 of them, they should be done in no time. That’s why I’m going to the hidden room! Absolutely not to skip work! This can be called a rational and efficient course of action, I mean, the more I repeat this, the more it seems that way, so it’s probably true.
「「「Aah~. He ran away~.」」」
It seems there was『Big Canary Lv23』in the hidden room. I wonder if it was tasty? Can’t say since I didn’t get to catch even a glimpse of it. Well, I guess it’s fine since it didn’t eat the treasure chest too.
「Here I am, sort of? Behold, the item that was hidden in this dungeon『Floating Stone – Floats』! Well, I tried to hype it up a bit, but I have no idea where to use it? Since it’s so useless, should we pass it to the geeks?」
But Slime-san is staring at it. Does it want it? Is it going to float? Is jiggle jiggle going to turn into boyon boyon? It apparently was going boyon boyon in the baths, but there were 3 of them? Where did the other 2 come from? Are they staying at the inn as well? Were there Slime customers at that inn?
In the end, I got the floating stone under the condition that I will treat everyone to a mysterious bird stew, which I then gave to Slime-san. Does it have a thing for stones? I tried offering it mithril and it ate that as well? But it has no interest in normal rocks, it’s not cheap being a gourmet.
However, is it really fine to sit around a hot pot with everyone in a dungeon? Well, the dungeon emperor and the dungeon master are excited by the idea, so it should be alright. Which reminds me, we didn’t have any bird stew until now.
Nothing seems to be respawning aside from the canaries, which are being taken care of by the vanguard. Out of boredom, Slime-san also joined the leading party. But you are going to get bitten if you sit on the head of the Bitch Leader like that? Even kobolds got bitten, you know? Wait? Did they? Or were they biting each other? Sort of?
Well, whatever. Let’s quickly check hidden rooms and pick up items. I can have a rest after we are done! So let’s hurry.
「Hhmm, didn’t we have something like this already? 『Grand Wall – ViT, PoW 30% Up, +Def』『Gigantic Spear – PoW 30% Up, +ATT』, wasn’t someone using this? Who was it?」
「Don’t you remember? We sold it because it was too heavy. And the size also made them hard to use.」
「We have a deficit of bows and mantles, but they don’t pop up at all.」
「We don’t have enough enchanted boots and gloves as well~.」
「Aren’t there too few axes and morning stars?」
Not popular goods. It’s decided, this goes to the weapon store and will be converted into everyone’s pocket money there. Which I will then rip off. Today I have anklets, sports bras, panties, and faux fur accessories. This is bound to make me a rich man.
「「「Haruka-kun. How about going to the forge when we return? We think crafted composite bows should be usable if we add effects to them?」」」
「Aah~, you sly geeks, aren’t you quite crafty as well~? Making bows to rip off the money from the girls? I like the idea! Let’s do this! Let’s rip them off!」
「「「Stoop it! We are going to sell them at a fair and reasonable price! It’s only for promotional purposes! We aren’t going to rip anyone off, okay? Look, they are glaring at us! And we aren’t sly.」」」
Indeed, if there were bows for everyone they could use them to fire in volleys before moving to other sorts of attacks. Being able to land the first hit is also advantageous in terms of tactic. It also will allow to conserve mana.
However, I have no trust in them. The geeks must have a composite bow’s crafting method memorized, but there is no telling what will come out if they try to make one! There is no guarantee that that bow won’t have a steam engine attached! Will it end up flying this time? Or maybe it will be a chair-type composite bow? It’ll launch you if you sit on it? Exploring dungeons with everyone carrying chairs around? If one gets tired they will have something to sit down on. Sounds convenient.
That’s right, if I make paid massage chairs and place them here and there I’ll have a small fortune! A relatively rich man! And if I merge that title with the magnate, I’ll get Great Magnate! Alright, time to get working! I just have to embed chairs with magic stones with vibration magic and properly tune them. So the guild will need one, the inn, and… The general store. Oh, and let’s put another one in the lord’s mansion! It has tons of tired middle-aged men. Every time I come there I see exhausted middle-aged men running around with documents? That’s definitely a profitable spot!
「The 50th floor is almost there~. Are you re~ady? Did you decide on the battle plan? The boss might be flying, so it might be an air battle? The idiots are going to charge anyway, so I recommend letting them jump at the boss and then blast it from behind with AOE attacks? They are idiots, so they wouldn’t notice even if they get caught in the attack? Or rather, how about blasting them on purpose?」
「「「Heeey! Don’t target us! We are going to notice, we already did since you said everything beforehand!」」」
「They noticed? They might be smarter than I thought, perhaps they are even smarter than water fleas? But then why did they completely forget about the existence of the boomerang that they pestered me so much to make? What was my hard work for? Why did it completely disappear from their minds as soon as they were done playing with it? It was made to perform ranged attacks! Throw it before charging in! And then earlier, you actually threw it, and then chased after it! Why?! Are you dogs? Even though you can’t perform even the most basic commands? Even though you are dumber than kobolds?」
「「「Aaaah, right, we had that!」」」
I can’t take this anymore! They are too stupid! They really forgot about it. They messed around with it a bit and that’s it! They simply wanted to play with a boomerang!
On top of that, throwing and chasing the boomerang in the forest they were calling it a training? Even though it’s a boomerang? And when the boomerang flew back to them, they were going『Whoooooa!』and went chasing after it again. It’s an ancient tribal weapon, but since they don’t have as much wits to them as aborigines, they end up chasing after it. What’s the point of having a boomerang then?! And as I thought, they damn forgot about it! And it’s probably only now, after hearing about it here, they first realized that it is a ranged weapon! How could they not get it after throwing it so many times? That 『Aaaah』is definitely 『we totally didn’t know that』type of 『Aaaah』. Definitely!