The Rising of Tanaka – 67 part 2
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Pasifista
「Phew, I guess with that everything is settled now.」
「No, you haven’t settled anything at all yet.」
Kaku-san poured cold water on Tanaka, who was feeling like he had finished their task.
「What are you talking about? Uesama is real wild, you know? So everything is as good as done already! Even I’ve already started dancing samba…」
As soon as he said that, Tanaka-san started performing dubious steps in the air.
「But didn’t it say it was on the verge of death-degozaru?」
Tanaka’s movements stopped at once at Suke-san’s words.
「It, it’s okay, alright? Once they know that Uesama is descending, all monsters will surely prostrate themselves. It’s already such a promised pattern, you know? Right, Uesama?」
「Well, there’s indeed something I’m quite concerned about, though.」
「Huh? What’s with that flag-like remark? Things seem to be proceeding smoothly, so please stop saying something like that. As long as it’s within my capability, I’ll help you out, alright? Like the preparation for samba competition or something.」
After saying that, Tanaka started performing steps again. Good graciousness, what a wild lower-body-san indeed.
「What I’m concerned about is the humans.」
「Hmm? Is there something wrong?」
Tanaka also uncharacteristically read the air. He ceased his samba and listened to Zonmer.
「It’s been more than a hundred years since I stopped interacting with humans. I’ve been living at peace for a long time, but recently I’ve been having a strange stirring in my heart. That was when you guys appeared. I can’t help but feel that this is a fated encounter.」
「It is indeed a coincidence-degozaru.」
「So there’s something I’d like ascertain, but….」
「What is it? Stop putting on airs and quickly say it, alright? I don’t need that kind of anticipation, after all.」
As if to build up more airs, Zonmer paused his words. It put suffocating pressure on the tough viscera of Tanaka-san, who once cried due to having an upset stomach upon drinking too much milk.
「… I’m wondering, do the people below call me Uesama? Or do they call me Samurai?」
「Who cares about such a thing?! Why are you throwing in a joke here? Even I’m starting to get angry alright?」
「Don’t tell me! Do they call me Takashi-kun?」
「So you actually heard it?! Say, in that case, you could have just come out then, couldn’t you? Because of that, I ended up unleashing the sorrowful past that I had sealed up, you know?!」
「I don’t mind becoming your friend, you know?」
「It’s none of your business! I, I’m telling you the truth, alright?! It’s not like I don’t have many friends or anything, alright?!」
Saying so, he silently asked his current best friends, Suke-san and Kaku-san, a lifeboat. With the bonds they’d nurtured up until now, they’d surely respond with words of affirmation.
「Uesama, Samurai, and Takashi-kun, huh-degozaru?」
「To receive three names…, as expected of a superior spirit.」
The two of them were astonished at the difference in level displayed by the superior spirit. They were truly men who could read the mood as usual.
「No, no, no! It’s Uesama, alright? It’s indeed Samurai in a way, but in the end it’s Uesama, after all! And by the way, Takashi-kun is not here, alright?!」
As everyone kept on excessively pulling on the materials of Tanaka-san’s sad past, his retort had turned into that of a scream.
「Anyway! Let’s return to the others! And then we’ll cross the mountain ranges! We’ll ask Uesama to take care of any monsters that appear! These are the current guidelines for Team Tanaka. Let’s go with ‘Tanaka Precious’ as the strategy name!」
Finally, Tanaka invoked the authority of a leader and forcefully concluded the conversation. That figure was exactly the personification of ego. Wasn’t his pathetic figure, as he spoke with a trembling voice due to the excessive mental damage he had sustained, exuding airs worthy of being called a Demon Lord?
「Returning is fine and all-degozaru, but will it really be able to control the monsters now that it’s weakened to such an extent-degozaru?」
「It’s not like I’m doubting the ability of a superior spirit or anything, but I’m indeed curious as to how it will control the monsters.」
The curiosity of Suke-san and Kaku-san was pointed toward Zonmer’s ability.
「It’s not like I’m intending to control the monsters by wielding my power. My power may have weakened, but it won’t affect my ability on that matter.」
「I see. That means the authority of Edo Bakufu (Edo shogunate) isn’t just for show, huh.」
Tanaka-san, who was mumbling while nodding his head with his eyes closed, was operating normally as usual.
「I don’t know what this Edobakufu (Evil laughter token) thing, but to be frank, for sure it’s indeed something that’s beyond your imagination.」
「What’s that cool magic tool?! I totally want to have it now. No, well, leaving that aside, quite the confidence you’ve got there. Just what kind of special ability do you have, Uesama?」
「It’s not a special ability of anything. Isn’t that comrade of yours over there using it as well? I’ll change my appearance. Into an appearance that exudes an overwhelming charisma that charms even monsters.」
「Wha! In that case, then my spot is….」
Kaku-san exclaimed in surpise. Kaku-san’s spot in the Tsundere attribute was being threatened by Curryman. Currently, it could be said that the beauty of his muscles in his human form was the only identity that supported Kaku-san. However, this superior spirit was about to raid that bastion. It was only natural for Kaku-san’s muscles to tremble in surprise.
「Don’t worry. It seems that my goal and yours are not the same.」
「Oh, please stop scaring me like that then. As expected, my muscles will surely be outshone against a superior spirit.」
Kaku-san was relieved as he seemed to manage to preserve his attributes for the time being. Another one who was also relieved was Tanaka-san.
「Haahaa…, that was close. The world was about to move on the destruction route there.」
Muscles spreading throughout the world. Even with the wisdom of mankind, it was impossible to stop this threat. The world began to tread the path of destruction—along with such a narration, Tanaka-san’s breath became erratic at the fear that the biohazard movie that shook the entire United States was close to turning into a reality.
「My weapon of choice is cuteness. Which can steal the heart of even the most ferocious monster!」
At these few words of Zonmer, Tanaka’s erratic breathing became colored with anticipation and excitement.
「R, Really?!」
Tanaka’s breathing, which had become erratic due to fear, became even more erratic due to excitement. Based on the conversation with Kaku earlier, there was no danger of muscles. Tanaka’s upper lip stretched in thought that he could surely expect something this time.
「Let me show you…, the other form of mime–」
Zonmer’s flame body glowed.
「Feel free to prostrate yourself, to the enchanting melody played by a superior spirit!」
The seemingly blazing, wavering silhouette gradually took shape.
「Oh…, oh…..」
Finally, a miracle materialized in front of Tanaka.
「This is the ultimate form that embody my charisma!」
There appeared a chick, whose body was dyed in glossy red.
「Meow-meow!」
Still in the same criminal voice as usual, Zonmer made cat noises.
「「Ooh!」」
Not knowing where to begin retorting on, Suke-san and Kaku-san exclaimed at the unfolding situation. As if responding to their expectations, the red chick charmingly flapped in the air.
The wings were so deformed and were flapping ever so slowly that it would originally be impossible to support it in the air. However, perhaps it was the exceptional power possessed by a superior spirit. The red chick defied the laws of physics and leisurely flew about in the sky.
Its behavior was so charming that it would make anyone suspect if every movement was calculated to charm those who saw it. Suke-san and Kaku-san got their hearts stolen and were wholeheartedly in delight.
However, there was one man there who shed tears in despair–.
「Indeed…, it may indeed be cute, but that’s not it…, that’s not it, isn’t it…?」
He covered his face with both hands and cursed the world.
「Fu, fuooooo!!!」
Just how many times did you want to repeat the same mistake until you were satisfied, Tanaka? That shivering in grief figure of yours called forth nothing but laughter, you know, Tanaka?
「… At least please stop with the criminal voice.」
Just as this man expressed such a request, he seemed to unexpectedly become fond of the fancy chick. Not only that, he even began to formulate a frightening plan to display a dandy figure of himself with the chick on his shoulder and become popular. There seemed to be already no way to save this man who had been soaked in darkness.
Now was not the time to be doing something like that, you know, Tanaka. Everyone was waiting for your return, you know, Tanaka.
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