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Cop Craft Volume 4 Chapter 6 Part 3

「Anyways, question number five!」

O’Neill announced as Tilarna simply looked at him wearily from the side.

「How long is this going to go on? This Question Corner or whatever…」
「Of course, until it is time for you to go home! If by any chance Officer Matoba happened to encounter a tragic traffic accident on his way here, then the questions would go on for all eternity!」
「Stop joking around. I’m tired. Make this the last one」
「In any case, question five! Hm… From Hugo from Queens Ballet: “Does Tilarna chan have a boyfriend? If not, then what is her type of guy?」
「I don’t」

Tilarna replied immediately

「And your type?」
「Whatever’s fine. Anyways, the end」

The three of them sighed hopelessly

「Sister Tilarna. You can’t just say that whatever’s fine! We want you to put a little more thought into your answers! If you don’t, then all we can do is make all sorts of wild guesses about your own taste!」
「Hmph. You can do as you please, I don’t mind」

Said Tilarna in an indifferent manner. Upon which O’Neill and the rest looked at each other and started their wild guesses

「In that case, let me show you. Hm… my heart tells me, maybe it’s something I heard from an angel a while back. That’s right… Sister Tilarna likes… that’s it, men with very thick chest hair!」
「Wha…?!」
「And also… that’s right, their hairstyle would be a neatly shaven completely bald skinhead!」
「What even is that? Aren’t you talking about yourself?! Well, I don’t know about your chest hair but…」
「There we go. So say it honestly. You are head over heels about my looks, right? No, completely enthralled, enthralled!」

O’Neill hugged himself, and shook his hips from side to side

「Hey…?!」

「No, maybe your type is actually the fatty type. A macho fatty like myself? Oh no, whatever should I do?」

Kenny hid his face behind his hands and smiled charmingly

「And I’m sure you like bartenders too. I may not earn very good money, but I work diligently and earn accordingly. Right?」

Bob’s sparkling eyes had trapped Tilarna completely.

「Sto— stop messing around! Skinhead? Fatty macho? A broken bartender? None of that! To put it simply, I have no interest in any of you!」
「No interest?! Oh, did you just say you’re not interested at all?!」

Said O’Neill in a harsh tone while pointing a finger at her.

「Sister Tilarna. You just shamed us publicly right now. I am hurt. That’s right, I am terribly hurt!」
「Yeah, how mean」
「I don’t think I will be able to stand back up again…」

The three men dropped their shoulders, as Tilarna stood in front of them in confusion.

「Well, I didn’t mean to do that… It’s not like I was saying it that way to begin with. I just, I had no ill will towards any of you…」
「In that case, at least tell us about the type of man you like. Just a little bit. If you do that, it may heal the wounds in our hearts」
「I— is that so?」
「It is so! Come on. Just say it! What kind of man would you like to go out with?!」
「Hm… that’s… eh…」

Tilarna started thinking seriously about it.

Hm… she’s very easy to manipulate. How wonderful. Hallelujah!

「Well… I think I like strong people better. I would never choose someone who couldn’t even beat an inexperienced Valsch like myself as a partner…」
「Hm… Okay, strong. What else, what else?!」
「Do— do you expect anything else? Aside from that… someone with rich life experience I suppose… and perhaps someone who is reliable… I guess」
「Hm… someone with abundant life experience! What else what else?!」
「Also… I guess someone kind, who is good at cooking and other stuff… but who sometimes unexpectedly also depended on me, like a child…」

Tilarna’s voice progressively got quieter as she went on, until the very last sentence was almost completely inaudible. The three men started thinking that it would get old pretty quickly if she kept listing all those abstract qualities she looked for in someone, so they started exchanging looks in order to figure out how to redirect the conversation towards something dirtier, when suddenly a new voice called out to them.

「Hey. what the hell are you people doing this early in the morning?」

After being startled and turning around quickly, they found Kei Matoba standing right behind their booths for who knows how long.

「Ke— Ke-ke-ke-ke, Kei?!」

Even more startled than O’Neill and the others, Tilarna managed to make everything on top of the table fall, as glasses and bottles were thrown around the room.

「We— we-we-we-were you listening?!」
「? Listening to what?」
「No, just what I was talking about, you know, this and that…」
「No clue, I just got here a moment ago. The store’s shutters were open, so I simply walked in no problem」

Said Matoba as he yawned.

「Detective Matoba! Why did you come with such terrible timing?! Only a little longer and— that’s right, if only you had come thirty minutes later, we would have surely been able to delve deeper into the abyss that is the “true voice of a Semanian beauty”!」
「What?! A Semanian beauty? Where?」

Matoba looked left and right in an exaggerated gesture. And just with his attitude, a very visible vein popped in anger from Tilarna’s temple, which all present noticed immediately.

「Kei. Today’s research was particularly difficult. And I’m even dressed like this right now. Don’t you have… anything to say about that?」

Matoba looked at Tilarna, who was dressed in a slightly more daring and exposed attire than her usual costumes, and raised his eyebrows.

「Ah right. You must be cold. I’m sorry」
「Wha…」
「In any case, let’s go home. Get ready」
「Rahkebye」
「Huh?」
「Shut up. You were late to begin with. It’s your fault that I got carried away by these idiots’ stupid talk, and started saying all sorts of pointless things」
「Ah, got it, sorry about that. In any case…」

And right then, Matoba seemed to remember something, and he smiled satisfied

「In any case… what?」
「Ah, right. The car, the car… Hey, O’Neill! You come as well. I’m gonna show you something pretty cool」

He said as he beckoned them to come out. O’Neill and the others simply followed him outside in suspicion. Right in front of the “Lady Chapel” club was an old convertible.

「Look! What do you think?! She’s my new girl!」
「Woah…」

The car was a Chevrolet Corvette C1

A first generation Corvette that used to be sold back in the 1950’s. It’s body was very complex, marked by beautiful curves. And the color was a pale yellow that almost looked white near its edges. It was sitting on top of the road with its Whitewall tires, its headlights adorned with a wire mesh. All in all, the car had a profoundly vintage charm to it.

That elegant appearance was more common in European cars than American cars, but the muffler that stuck out from its tail, and the design of its front bumper casually remarked its “Americanness”.

「That’s awesome. I know this car, boss! It’s a Corvette Stingray!」

Said Kenny excited

「No no, this is not a Stingray. It’s its immediate predecessor, the Corvette C1. No, well, actually, the name C1 was in use for a long time before the Stingray」

Said Matoba while he smiled in a very genuine manner.

「This one right here is an almost fifty year old model. Which means that it has been passed around from hand to hand quite a bit. The original C1s had a lot of problems, but… it seems like they became quite popular afterwards. The original C1s were 3.8 liters V6 machines, but this one is a 4.3 liter V8. Its transmission is also four times faster. Of course it feels puny when compared to a modern car but… well, it’s still a V8. Ever since I lost the Maserati, I’d been telling the boss that I wanted a V8 this time. But I never would have thought that we would get an oldie like this. Well, that was mostly a joke. But in the end I got a Corvette! Look at this figure! It’s too beautiful!」
「Woah, it really is beautiful, boss. This color! They don’t make them like this anymore」
「Rather, I’d say that this car was seventy years ahead of its time, don’t you think? To think that a car like this even existed back then… Even the Maseratis were no match for it. I’m sure it costs a fortune」
「It was the beloved car of a drug dealer that we caught in a raid last month. It probably costs over four hundred thousand dollars for sure」
「Woaaaaaah!」

As Matoba, Kenny and Bob got excited over the car, Kilarna was looking at them as if it was a matter completely unrelated to her. And O’Neill who noticed that, approached her casually, and asked her

「…Ah, Sister Tilarna? I’ve noticed that for the past minutes, you have looked unbelievably miserable」
「Not really」

She replied coldly. It was a mechanic voice, devoid of any feelings whatsoever

「I was just a little shocked at those men gushing all over the metallic piece of trash. Well… just thinking if they weren’t mesmerized at all by my current attire」
「I— is that so. I simply felt an uneasy feeling and answering that call was my duty as a priest… so it seems like your mood was spoiled completely after all. Well, if you ever want to complain about something, come visit us any time」
「That’s none of your business. But Daash Thanna.」
「Ah. Right. No problem」
「Neve shiiya, O’Neill」

After Kenny and the others were done with their car freak talk, Matoba called Tilarna over

「Okay, Tilarna! Won’t you be the first guest to use the passenger seat?! Well, get on! Come on, come on!」
「Ah…」

Tilarna got on expressionless. And as she got on, her Krége smashed against the door’s coating. Matoba’s smile vanished immediately

「Hey hey, watch out. You’re going to scratch it」
「Sorry」

She flinched while in her seat. She then harshly threw the Krége on top of the dashboard. Matoba raised his eyebrows

「Hey, I’m telling you to watch out!」
「Sorry」

She then stretched her body, and violently smashed her fist against the windshield. Getting Matoba to raise his voice

「Hey, what’s your problem? What if it comes off?」
「Ah, is that so? Sorry」
「No you’ve been doing this on purpose all along, haven’t you?」
「Shut up. It would be better if this car broke down as soon as possible!」
「What are you talking about? I thought you were going to like it too?! What’s with your attitude? What do you hate so much about this Corvette?!」
「I hate everything about it!」
「What? Ah, you’re annoying… what’s with you?」

He started the car as the two of them kept arguing nonstop. Only their discussion could be heard within the car, as their voices managed to even cover the engine’s special sound.

O’Neill, Kenny and Bob simply watched them as they drove off and shrugged.