Chapter 99: Since she is a skeleton, both Steam-san and Holy Light-san seem to think they don’t have to do their job.
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Translator: “Pink Tea” Editor: ”Ryunakama”
Day 38 – Midday, Omui, Guild of Adventurers.
「Whoooa?! Lad, can we really have this?! For real? I’m gonna cry if it’s just a joke? I’m not giving it back? Ah, I’ll put spit on it.」
What a dirty old man this spear dude is. The old man is licking a spear. I don’t think anyone would complain if I report him? It’s a pervert. There are clear grounds for concern.
「Haruka-kun, is it really fine? We just wanted to repay the favor? We didn’t even do anything in the end?」
Looks like the sword old man is not going to lick anything. The four girls ran off to the training ground as soon as they said their thanks for the weapons. I’m surrounded by nothing but old men, again. I’ve never heard about being swarmed with old men after getting summoned to a different world? Cute girls ditched us for the training grounds? Is it about Affection Rating after all?
「No, I mean, didn’t you spend three days looking for us in the dungeon? You went all the way to the 30th floor while we went back through the portal on the 46th floor, leaving you behind? It’s a consolation payment of sorts? Kind of?」
As soon as the old men heard the news they made preparations and went to the rescue. Planning to group up with the president and others they descended to the 30th floor, where they received the news of our safe return to the town, upon which they also turned back, and finally reached the town just a short while ago. I felt a bit sorry for them, so I decided to give away some of the remaining weapons, but they made a bit of an uproar out of it.
If I include the stuff like harpoons from the frogs, then I still have close to 500 weapons left. Even after disposing of the useless inventory I still have plenty left. I’m holding onto weapons from minotaurs, so they ended up with the weapons from the puppets or lizards, but everyone is overjoyed anyway. Despite the dangers of this town, they don’t have proper equipment here. Aside from clubs. The town is overflowing with them. It is overflowing, but is it really okay? I just saw housewives chatting in front of the greengrocer, all equipped with clubs? I overheard them saying that they will club their husbands if they dare to cheat? Isn’t this town more dangerous than the forest?
It seems some monsters still remained in the dungeon even after its death, with a few still possible to be found on 46F and up. Will I be able to handle monsters from 31F and further? Not now for sure, but after I finish adjusting to my new skills it might be a good idea to check it out. But for the time being, I will stick to practicing and then start from gobs. I mean, I’m pretty sure I will be tripping over myself and clashing into monsters again.
The local lord, Meri’s father, also seems to have sent troops, so I’ll donate a set of harpoons from the frogs to him. I’ll just pass them with a message through the old man leading the guild. I already have the receptionist ladies bribed with fruitcakes for that. With this, I don’t owe them anything. Falling into pitfalls is a pain, but getting out is also a pain. I don’t want to do that again.
「I’m going home now, wanna come? It’s inside a forest though? Or more like, a cave? Well, in a forest?」
I asked Armored Pres-san, to which she responded by nodding, looks like she is coming as well. Gob sweeping should go really well. I still should be able to sell a lot of mushrooms, so there is no harm in gathering extra. I’m sure there are even more of them now.
The classmates are still lying around with X-marks for the eyes, so let’s leave them be. Must be the result of getting beaten up. But normally, getting trained and beaten by a Dungeon Emperor is an extremely rare and valuable experience. I’m getting beaten all the time though? Without hesitation? Is it even possible for the tamed person to attack their master? And beat them?
I came back to the woods, but there are only a few gobs and kobolds? Their levels are also somewhat down? But mushrooms are plenty. Their quantity is massive. The general store lady’s addiction is about to get even worse. Somehow, the forest seems brighter? It probably won’t be much of a training, but let’s hunt them. Wait, everything is already hunted down. At least leave some monsters for me to practice? I want to spar with gobs? As one might expect, I don’t want to get beaten up every day? Flying through the woods like the wind she erases gobs… Looks like all my spar partners were exterminated. I guess I can’t avoid getting beaten up.
We reached the cave, but the sun is already setting. It’s better if we spend the night here and then head back. And there is still cleaning to do. Both in terms of rooms and gobs.
Before it gets dark we sweep the depth of the forest, and after we get back, sweep the house. Armored Pres-san is surveying the rooms with curiosity. Perhaps the modern furniture looks that unusual? Or maybe she is considering turning the place into a dungeon? Well, even if she does, I will still remodel it.
Now, the forest depths in question, as I thought, the monsters there also became weaker… And the monster insufficiency also seems to be more severe here? It even seems that without cultivation they might go completely extinct? Well, not like I’m gonna do that.
At most, goblin leaders would pop out from time to time, but the king game’s boom seems to have completely passed. That’s great. No, training-wise it’s not great at all? I mean, if I don’t rush, everything gets obliterated before I get to do anything? A moment of hesitation and I don’t have anything to kill? This is a competition at this point, first come first served. Speaking of serving, I’m sure Armored Pres-san would’ve easily dominated the bargain sale if she tried. She probably would’ve been inaugurated as a Bargain Emperor.
We didn’t find a king even in the deepest part of the forest. Let’s gather mushrooms and go back. The night is about to fall. Let’s continue tomorrow by farming kobolds and then going upstream to hunt weak monsters. Clubs are piling up again. But I wonder, just why are they selling so well?
Shrooms are way more numerous than before though. As I thought, with goblin deficiency in this forest, more mushrooms get left untouched. Tons of health and mana mushrooms, but no Potent Mushrooms it seems, well, that’s to be expected. Roasted Potent Mushrooms with soy sauce were delicious, and now that I have rice I had some hopes, but they are not such an easy find even with an Epic Luck.
Going back to the cave I begin cleaning. Since I’m going to use magic for this it won’t take long, but since I wasn’t home in quite a while I take time to diligently clean everything. I last stayed here when I was waiting for Whatever-kun, so I was absent for about 10 days? Is it really fine? As a Hikikomori? My Hikikomori is level 8 already, but I’m not getting to hikikomori at all?
「All clean. I’m back, my sweet home. It’s been a while, even though it’s my home? Even though by now the trip doesn’t take me even a day?」
That’s right, my travel speed has risen so much that I can make a round trip in a day, in part because 『Movement』turned into『Teleportation』, but being too scared I’m yet to actually try using Teleportation Magic for the actual travel. Until now, my skills never gave me an easy time, even though the different world is all about skills and magic, what is a person who can’t trust his skills supposed to do?
But it seems Teleportation is after all an evolved form of Movement magic, so even without actually teleporting my speed is greatly increased. 『Walking』also turned into 『Swift Foot』, making me even faster. How should I put it, it’s like the distance is shrinking on its own? As I move, it is accompanied by a strange feeling as if the space around me is bending. I’d like to at least get the hang of it while we are in the forest, but since a moment of carelessness means that all of my spar partners (monsters) will be annihilated, I can’t take it slowly. It’s a super live combat practice. I already crashed into goblins more than 10 times?! I almost had my first kiss with one?! Of course, I beat it to death!! That alone I absolutely cannot allow as a highschool boy!!!
I cleaned the bath too, and while at it, also filled it with hot water. It’s a jacuzzi. There won’t be any bubble jets unless someone sends wind inside through wind magic, but it’s a jacuzzi. It must be the only one in this world.
「Wanna take a bath? You can go first? It’s a jacuzzi, you know? With jets? Streams? It’s a Jet Stream Attack Jacuzzi?」[1]
Unfortunately, it seems that Armored Pres-san is not a Gundam otaku. And she also is fine with taking a bath later. So it’s a lonely Jet Stream Attack in the bath. It’s just a bubble jet, but it’s a JSA attack anyway. JSA!JSA!!
「Pheeeeew, a bath after getting beaten up feels exceptional. Something is spreading through my body. Probably『Regeneration』at work? Returning to life? Quite literally?」
Speaking of which, turning into a higher rank『HP Recovery』didn’t become 『Super HP Recovery』or anything, and straight went for 『Regeneration』? Did it just give up on recovery? Isn’t regeneration normally a monster skill? Can humans even regenerate? Should they? Am I going to be alright?
「Hm?」
With my Detect Presence I sense that outside, Armored Pres-san began taking off her armor. She couldn’t wait for the bath anymore? Or maybe she began preparing in advance since removing the armor takes a while? She is a skeleton, during the first appearance I saw her all nude, complete bare bones, but since I now know that she is a girl, entering the bath together might be an issue? Well, those are just bones? I actually wouldn’t mind helping her wash them?
「I’m getting out! Do you care to wait for some little bit? Kind of? Just a short whOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAH!」
Eh? Nonono, according to the Detect Presence it is Armored Pres-san that just entered the bath. Is it that 『I will scrub your back』kind of thing? Is she trying to do something servant-like since she is tamed by me? Or something like that? Thinking hard I’m not thinking at all, the supreme thinking-type of thinking Apex Thinking has completely stopped. Just what is thithithithithis… WHO?!
Long, slender legs. A pair of well-toned, long, beautiful legs entered the room? The front is covered with the towel that she is holding, but she is completely defenseless from behind! Whooa, her hips are so high! Her legs are way too long! It’s like her super-high hips immediately continue into the slim waist. The Anglo-Saxon, or maybe Latin, or porcelain-like pure white skin is dazzling to the eyes, wait, just who is that?! Who is that peerless beauty?! Or rather, where did Armored Pres-san go? They kept calling me crazy for quite a while, but did it finally happen? Did I really go crazy now? She is gazing at me with her big eyes? Ah, a downturned eyes look is very cute. Eh, ooh, her eyelashes are so long! The nose is high! Such well-defined features! Who is this pretty girl? This world is full of handsome men and beautiful women of western-type, but she is far beyond even that. Creme de la creme. Not once in my whole life have I ever seen such a beauty even among models or actresses. So fair, bewitching, lovely, charming, pretty… Eh?!
「EEehm?? Armored, or rather, boney, or rather, Dungeon Emperor, or Battering Pres, no, are you… A-A-A-Angelica-san…?」
This lovely appearance, this dignified bearing, this standing figure, worthy of being called too beautiful, is none other than that of Armored Pres-san Angelica-san’s?! EH? Wasn’t she just bones? Bones??
She nods in a familiar way. Two round objects below her face also nod in unison. They are big. And she is smiling at me with a smile that seems capable of illuminating the world… But she was a skeleton? Her race on that status page? No, she became raceless later??? Eh? Actually, she is not even covering her front anymore!! This is a risky danger for a highschool boy? I can see? A lot of things? Steam-san and Holy Light-san are both slacking off? This is RED ZONE!!! …EH? Waah!! …Too late?
・
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The next morning.
Yesterday, I got thoroughly washed and cleaned, every inch of my body, and I returned the favor in the same fashion, going over every nook and cranny of her body, after which a goodnight. Over and over again. In a highschool boy sort of way. Finally, I zoomed up the stairs of adulthood, in a highschool boy sort of way? She is a monster? No, this is totally fine by me. Rather, I’m pretty sure I will never see anyone more beautiful than her? The only thing that bothers me, is it really alright to be doing this with someone I subdued through Taming? It’s kind of too late though? Well, she seems to be smiling with a very blissful look, so I guess it’s fine? Is it? Is it, really?
In the end, though I kept endlessly yapping that the Faraway Labyrinth has no monster girls, turns out, one was with me all along.
[TL Notes:
[1] Jet Stream Attack, a trademark attack of a certain team of pilots from Gundam universe.
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