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Chapter 228: That title has little prospect of getting animated or becoming a movie, but it might suit a lewd book

Translator: “Pink Tea” Editor: ”Ryunakama”

Day 60 – Morning, Dungeon.

I got a dungeon that was already explored up to the 37th floor, and was abandoned like that, waiting for its turn for a clear. The geeks were busy with it, but ever since they were called to join others with the raids the place is untouched.

Since it was nearby, we had the geeks send us to the 37th floor with Gate, and parted ways with them after. We are going with the usual 『Nod-Nod, Jiggle-Jiggle』group.

Today I’m going for middle floors only, so I would’ve been fine even without the two, but they are going to 『accompany』me it seems, not sure if this is an effect from『Taming』but they are quite keen on following me? Come to think of it, even at the inn, there is always a group of the bitches behind me, was that Taming’s effect? Well, I can’t dismiss any of them on my own, for some reason, they won’t allow me. According to rumors, it’s only until they repay the favor, but 『Bitches’ Gratitude』has little prospect of getting animated or becoming a movie, although it sounds like a fitting title for a lewd book.

Even only the middle floors, if the monsters lack in speed or numbers they can’t serve even as practice, but right now, the very use of『Magic Wrap』is important. Things should become a lot easier as soon as『Apex Thinking』-san gives me calculations based on the data that I’m feeding it.

Unlike the safe automatically operating『Cheat Skills』what I have is a bunch of fully manual『Junk Skills』forcibly merged and weaved together, that I’m manipulating and controlling all at once, which comes with a high probability of failure, and even if everything goes well, if they exceed my ability for control, I will take damage.

「Well, self-destruction and self-regeneration are in a closed loop now, like a compound fracture of every bone in the body and snapped muscles? The Estimated time for full recovery is about one second? Kind of?」

Since even the speed of regeneration received a massive boost, I’m perfectly fine regenerating in the middle of combat, as long as I watch out for fatal wounds I can fight without any issues. Well, it can get really bad if I break my legs, suddenly being stuck in the middle of a swarm of monsters isn’t just dangerous, it wouldn’t be surprising to have one of them bite off my head at any moment.

But well, isn’t『Bound Dog Lv 38』just the strongest?　Are they going to woof an unyielding loyalty? Well, those are actually just jumping puppies, so let’s steel our hearts and knock them out, I’m actually hitting them with『Staff of the World Tree』, but it should be alright if I hit them really, really, hard. Since they will vanish on the spot?

(Jiggle Jiggle!)

Slime-san turned red, and clad in flames, is currently having a meal, do those count as hot dogs? And after eating tons of『Leap』skill it’s now jumping around in high spirits, but with the dungeon being too narrow, it’s bouncing off the walls like a pinball? It looks fun, but the dogs are desperately running around, trying to get away from its odd, baffling and just bizarre trajectory, but whatever, I guess?

「Armored Pres-saaaan, moving still feels weird, but is it actually fine? I sort of feel like were I to get used to this I’ll become something else entirely? Is this really fine? It just feels all sorts of wrong, like, doesn’t it bring out a sense of wickedness, making it seem totally viciously evil?」

(Nod, Nod!)

It’s fine, it seems, I hope that nodding wasn’t to the viciously evil part, I really want to think it wasn’t. I have an inkling that this points to certain events unfolding every night, but it shouldn’t be that.

Was that perhaps an example? That Slime-san’s pinball-like bizarre and irregular attack, with the way I’m now randomly 『Teleporting』all over the place, while constantly accelerating with 『Extreme Velocity』and『Rush』replicating the previous precise flow-like movements refined of uselessness and controlling them is not possible. Then how about abandoning the process and going about in reverse, merely patching it up and controlling it just enough to make it match the result, that approach should be the simplest and most optimal. Cutting while abandoning the precision of movements in the process, going from the future where I cut the enemy, and forcing everything to sum up to result in that 『Slash』. Can I do that?

I tried, but I don’t get it at all?

Why would the monster be slashed horizontally if I went for a very straightforward downward swing from overhead? Are the slashes being 『Teleported』too? And my own positioning is weird too, here I take a step forward, and now I’m looking at the enemy from behind. Aside from the end result, that is a cut enemy, everything else is a mess, and I’m also passing through enemy attacks.

Is this the same effect as 『Vanish』that Vanish Wolves were using? Am I passing through by instantaneous super short range teleportation? Am I disappearing for a moment? Jumping through space? It’s way too incomprehensible for me. Since I’m fully entrusting this to『Apex Thinking』-san, 『Apex Thinking』-san probably knows what it’s doing, but my own mind can’t keep up with it. That’s what I’m fighting with no idea of what is going on, cutting enemies without understanding what is happening.

In the end, the pack of『Blade Swallows Lv 40』of the 40th floor was slashed to pieces and disappeared without me understanding anything. A puzzling battle, which I won without knowing how.

I mean, a diagonal slash at a blade swallow somehow cut it perfectly vertically from overhead, like, what the hell? Was it Swallow Counter, just for swallows? [1] Ganryu Island is impossible for me? I’d attack the boat before he can give me that 『Kept you waiting』, you know? [2] I mean, the one who arrived first is at clear advantage? I definitely would’ve made traps instead of waiting. Rather, forget Swallow Counter, I’m far too busy with Midnight Counter every day?

But Armored Pres-san, who was observing, is nodding along, does it mean that it’s good?

Slime-san is going bounce-bounce, it definitely wasn’t looking. Swallows seems to be delicious too, but what’s the point for a slime to learn『Air Maneuverability』?

Currently on standby.

The 44th floor we were greeted by old acquaintances 『Mithril Golems Lv 44』, an awkward attack with 『Staff of the World Tree』might erase them from existence, which would be a huge waste. So Armored Pres-san is in the process of dismantling them with precise cuts. Slime-san is also snatching some bites, but it’s fine if it’s just a bit.

From time to time Slime-san would pull out a mithril sword or spear to fight with it, but I haven’t given any mithril weapons to it. In that case, it’s making them inside its body. Slime-san is creating and producing weapons from mithril which it then uses in combat. In that case it’s fine to allow Slime-san to eat more.

From time to time Slime-san would also change color to silver, deflecting incoming attacks, but that might actually be a form of mithrilification, so since it’s put to a good use and seemingly delicious on top of that, it’s fine to let it have more. I still have plenty of mithril left too.

「Well, there might be no other choice but to learn to control bizarre and irregular attacks coming from those strange and abnormal movements born from this twisted mash-up of skills which I’m not even sure could be called a technique, while struggling not to get my mind blown, but like hell I can do that! In this case, as close to impossible as it may be, it would still be better to pursue 『Kyojitsu』than this. This is, how should I put it, I have no idea what I am doing myself. Wait a moment, now that I think of it, I often ask myself just what the hell am I doing in day-to-day life too, so maybe there is no issue? Is it really fine for combat to be like that too?」

「Need……Both…Are…Require-red?」

Is she saying that both are required? Or that she requires Red (blood)? I don’t think she is a yandere, so I’m sure she means that I need those bizarre attacks and 『Kyojitsu』, or perhaps that I must practice both, but that’s tough. Well, still better than getting stained in Red. Since it’s not about 『Beating』, I’d like to think that it should be alright. [3]

There also was a hidden room so I checked it on the way and found 『Demon God’s Zweihander – PoW 60% Up, Recklessness +ATT -INT』, the first item with 60% bonus, although it’s a muscle-brain’s weapon. What do we do, such a meatheaded weapon would fit only the idiots, but they might become unable to understand speech if they were to become even dumber. Well, they are idiots anyway, so whatever, even now, they might appear to understand human speech, but they definitely don’t understand the meaning of the words.

But it’s huge, a zweihander is a large sword the size of a person, it was supposed to be about 1,8 meters but this one is about 2 meters. The skill 『Recklessness』on this sword is way too meatheaded, but I do feel that this is still better than having them clubbing enemies with boomerangs. In the first place, they have jobs like swordsman or knight, so they get no bonuses while using boomerangs, and no skills for them too, so this one is definitely better. I wonder if they still remember how to use swords though? How worrisome.

「Then, shall we go down? We are about to enter the middle floors so… Well, you are playing around even on the lowest floors, so it doesn’t really matter, I guess? Or is it? But judging from the experience so far it’s going to end up with the usual 『They were very delicious』. Well, if there won’t be any tasty monsters then we will take a snack break. Now, let’s go down.」

(Jiggle~Jiggle)

Eating both snacks and monsters, its gluttonous appetite is a good match for Avarice-san in her lack of restraint. But for some reason, when it’s inside dungeons, I always end up spoiling Slime-san? It’s all because it reminds me of the first time we met, when it was so hungry that it couldn’t use magic power properly and could barely muster any of its strength, yet kept desperately fighting… Well, if it was in top form then pres and the others would’ve been eaten, which is a problem too, I guess feeding it until Slime-san is full isn’t a big deal. It seems to be enjoying every day, after all.

Now, let’s go back and first have monsters, and then stop for snacks.

[TL Notes:
[1] Tsubame Gaeshi – (lit “Swallow Counter”) a reference to the famous technique of the legendary Japanese swordsman Sasaki Kojirō. It was an overhead katana (or, in Sasaki’s case, a nodachi) stroke that was performed so swiftly it resembled the flight of a sparrow, hence the name.
[2] Ganryu Island is the site of the famous duel between Miyamoto Musashi and Sasaki Kojiro. According to the tale, Musashi kept Sasaki waiting for hours, which as some claim was a clever ploy to screw with Sasaki.
[3] Just kidding, there won’t be a footnote for yandere XD
]