Chapter 299
Chapter 299: The man everyone wants to catch No.1 should be of greater interest than Best Prisonist Laureate.
Day 72 – Daytime, Road
We departed on three carriages, but 『Luxurious and Gorgeous Carriage for Passionately Welcoming and Entertaining Lovely-type Sexy Female Knights DELUXE』 in which I’m riding with Armored Pres-san, Slime-san, and Dancing Girl, still has no signs of Sexy Female Knights returning? Just how they went to change clothes? I’ve heard that women take a while to prepare, but it looks like they still need more time.
「In the end, he plundered this prisoner transport too, huh?」
「Well, it was transformed beyond recognition, and Horsie-san also turned into something terrifying, so they probably couldn’t do anything about it?」
「In a way, it’s rare to see a person who temporary prison cell or prisoner transport fits that well, so they could’ve given it to him? Like Best Prisonist Award?」
The public riding in 『HIGHWAY STAR』 that follows after us is blasting me with inconsiderate criticisms, but I’m in a very lenient mood right now, so I’m going to let it pass. I mean, as the carriage is rocking the right of me is going bounce-bounce, the left jiggle-jiggle, and on top of me is spring-spring, this is a pretty delightful trip. I’m glad I loosened the suspension before we departed. Moreover, with the entire interior being a bed, every jolt and bump results in us tumbling around on the bed, getting tangled with each other, marvelous specifications! An enjoyable journey.
Well, we are going to have orphans with us on the way back, so this is the fun we can have only on the way there, so let’s enjoy ourselves.
As I’m drowsily nodding off the carriage is making its way towards the Capital. We should arrive in a day. It’s fine to take it easy, it’s fine. I’m pretty tired, so this is just fine.
I took Demon Scythes with me, so the carriage’s protection is covered. We also took a look at the remains of overflown dungeons while taking stops for rest, but they were really pitiful. A tiny dungeon with only 30 floors without any hidden rooms. Destroy this much for crying out loud!
And then we had lunch at what previously was a dungeon. It’s unexpectedly raining?
「Uuh, even though I already overate yesterday and ONE MORE SET is no longer enough~.」
「But it should be alright, we also have Nefertiri-san’s Dance Revo!」
「I let my guard down, to think Carbonara-san would be manifested here!」
「Even though I wanted to hold back today… Even though I decided to hold back today~.」
It turned out pretty good when I attempted to make it, so I treated everyone to it. However, while delicious, it’s still a sham. However, if I can at least recreate the feeling, it would seem like they’ve recovered something. In the end, they’ve lost far too much to get back everything. I mean, smartphones are straight up impossible? I’ve never even touched one? Yeah, I didn’t have an ordinary flip phone either, since I didn’t have anyone to call? Just leave me be!
「Sadly, it’s just a carbonara-style dish, or rather, pasta-like something with pork, mushrooms, mysterious milk, unidentified eggs, and wheat flour, stretched into this, with sauce topping and plenty of black pepper something something? Kind of?」
Yup, I still haven’t gotten hold of cheese and cream.
But I managed to confirm their existence! When the time comes everyone will surely bow down to the advent of Pizza-san, although I’m sure cola is impossible too?
「「「「Let’s dig in!」」」」
Loading a mountain of pasta-like something on a giant plate I hand out 22 small plates and a bucket, but… The sauce is flying all over the place! Why are you playing tug of war with pasta?! Why are you fighting over pasta, rolling it up until Carbonara-san becomes one giant ball?! Or rather, there are even some wielding two forks. Although Dancing Girl’s become level 1 because of Taming, she was strong nonetheless. Winding up pasta like in a swirl, she then retreats with dance-like footwork. Fighting, pulling, and stuffing themselves they go back to fighting for another portion of pasta. Their Girl (fighting) Power is at full display. Carbonara is fearsome!
Well, they seem to be having fun so it’s fine I guess. But highschool girls leaking white liquid from their white liquid-smeared mouths as white liquid is dripping from their lips will cause Mosaic-san to get called? Licking it up with your tongues is also quite a bit that? I don’t think there is any helping your manners, femininity, or ONE MORE SET?
And once again rocking in a carriage, or rather, I’ve made it so it rocks, or even if it didn’t I’m going to cause it to rock, or rather, I tried rocking it?
The horses of 『HIGHWAY STAR』 seems to be still full of energy? Due to the effects of 『Acceleration』 the speed keeps growing with inertia, so they are running by leaping over large distances in a fashion similar to 『Shukuchi』. Well, that’s why that carriage can only go in a straight line? Yeah, horses aren’t going to make curves. But they are faster than I expected. Let’s give them recovery mushrooms as a reward later.
And another mysterious issue was clarified. The culprit was Dancing Girl!
「Royalty, education, sexual techniques’ zenith.」
I thought that it’s weird how much of a technician she is, and even Armored Pres-san got more formidable, dishing out various new moves, but turns out, long ago, Dancing Girl was an imperial princess, and was taught the most sophisticated sexual techniques? Which seems to have included pro wrestling moves too? What was that empire trying to accomplish? By all means, I’d have gladly moved and settled there, but it seems to have perished. And now she instructed Armored Pres-san in the secret techniques of the Imperial Family, causing revolution in her skills, and leading to obtaining exquisite secret arts! Well, her heights of sexual techniques were a bit too extreme, pushing the cornered highschool boy to the most extreme limits of extremity, but forceful counterattack with enforced embarrassing correction and double knockdown sent them to sleep. Yeah, let’s do some side job while I have a chance.
Body to body communication in a certain kind of grappling body language has led to 『Adamantine Fists』 going up by two levels. As expected, the Dungeon Emperor Pair got hands. At the very least, Skill-wise it seems to have been recognized as hand-to-hand combat?
And with this and that I’m rocking inside the carriage while doing my side job, request tickets have been piling up lately. Some even want a ribbon like the one the Horsie-san has on its tail. Do they like horses that much? Or maybe it’s about riding? In a nighttime grappling competition sort of way?! Well, the Pres often ties her hair in a ponytail, so she probably wants to get a matching ribbon to get along with Horsie-san.
It’s not like we are in a hurry, and there won’t be much to do once we reach the Capital anyway?
I mean, even if we make it there early, we will still have to wait for Royal Girl and Meripapa-san. A bloody baldie, or rather, an archbishop and old men without scalps, and the nobles, who the Pres captured, that were beaten into such a miserable state that it was impossible to tell if this is a person, a monster, or a mineral, are also going to be transported to the capital. Manju are really scary!
Also, one of the girls that was working at the general store agreed to manage the Capital branch of the Souvenir Store and should now be on her way there with her family.
While working on the requests, since there isn’t anything better to do, I focus on shortening the duration of the return trip, creating pavement as we make our way to the Capital. It’s with a good even road that the true value of 『HIGHWAY STAR』 can be seen! I’m sure the orphans will be overjoyed too.
Finally recovered?
「Now, let’s take care of some custom orders too? I mean, I was surprised by a sudden flood of leotard orders, but turns out that Dancing Girl’s aerobics class started with great reception, and combined with ONE MORE SET! makes for a comprehensive plan to obtain the bodyline of your dreams, but does Dancing Girl need a leotard too? Yeah, Armored Pres-san has many leotards, but only a select few can be worn in public. Despite the support for the black leotard faction, we also tried to appeal to the white faction and reconciled with the light blue faction, but with the appearance of the gray faction, the battle situation changed completely. With so many leotards I’m very busy with dressing her up and stripping down. Kind of~.」
「Desire, everything, options included.」
Looks like she also needs leg warmers, head bands, and volleyball shoes? Why did she even start giving dance lessons? By the way, the girls are also flooding me with inquiries about belly dance outfits. All of those are very lovely suggestions with great worth to making them a reality, but the dancer outfit is currently being designed by the Bitches and Culture Clubs’ Girls in the following carriages.
Well, since I Tamed her I do have to make Dancing Girl’s clothes too. During our battle at the limit yesterday, tentacles played an active part, so I got a perfect reading of her measurements and shapes, and also had them burned into my Rajingan. She has a super flexible body, difficult to make clothes for, but I already learned the approach from the time with Gymnastics Girl, so I’m now busy sewing, fitting, putting clothes on her, stripping clothes on her, currently going into the round 16, but while they have unfair advantage of tag team, I also get double the enjoyment, but the counterattack of a captured highschool boy surrounded on all sides by breasts, butts, and thighs have quickly earned me level 7 of 『Regeneration』.
Traveling in a great chaos, the unending battle has entered the war of attrition, even though I’m busy with work. Well, this is not a scene that can be shown to the orphans, so this is a special kind of fun that can only be had on our way there, and I’m kind of almost there?
I’d also like to work on equipment, but 『Ancient Sarcophagus – Armament, Complete Immunity, Automatic Defense, Auto Mending, Enhance ALL, Magic Sword Dance, ?, ?, ?＋ATT, +DEF』 in which Dancing Girl was sealed is a cheat item on par with Armored Pres-san’s equipment, so there is no need to tweak with it. But when equipped it turns into an armor with a tower shield, concealing that collaboration of lovely, charming, alluring, and enchanting of a body, so let’s hide it for now. Yup, I couldn’t cut this thing even with full power Dimension Slash with a divine sword, so I obviously carried it off with me? I mean, it was just lying on the ground?
As for the equipment that I painstakingly forced myself to tear from the middle-aged men, the barrier device 『Staff of Absolute Boundary』 that Archpriest, or rather Archbishop, well, an old man? was using to create a barrier, which I couldn’t detect even with Rajingan, turned out to be a disappointment. It’s not that I couldn’t detect him, he simply wasn’t there? Stepping into Absolute Boundary he was merely traveling with the coffin, and couldn’t actually move by himself, and could only look, without even hearing anything. He simply showed up because he saw that I was badly injured, and lost an arm with the weapon, otherwise, he couldn’t even undo the seal on Dancing Girl from inside of that barrier. Actually, it was that old man who should be given the title of hikikomori? Why me!
But even so, 『Staff of Absolute Boundary – 30% UP ALL, Sorcery Mastery, Absolute Boundary, Seal, MP Increase』, it has 30% buff to all stats. The biggest issue at the moment is self-disintegration due to the lack of ViT, even if it can’t be completely stopped, anything that can at least somewhat soften the damage is nice to have. 『Sorcery Mastery』 and InT might improve control over Magic Wrap, and since it will also boost MP which was just barely enough the last time, I’ll take it. 『Absolute Boundary』 allow only to observe surroundings without being able to move, so it can’t even be used for peeping. A tool that wouldn’t allow me to make an escape if something goes wrong cannot be trusted! 『Seal』 also must be powerless to seal sermons. Looks like that still hasn’t manifested as a skill? Well, the Geeks have『Seal』 too, so I can ask them how it’s used when they return. Maybe I should also seal their 『Barrier』 skill and burn their heads while I’m at it?
With 『Wisdom』 and 『Staff of Absolute Boundary』 I should have better control now, but since its level also grew there is no telling what the actual result will be. And for the part that I can’t control, I’ll have to compensate by gathering ViT gear. I went up two levels, but ViT grew the least of all stats. It was about only one third of InT so my ViT is most likely not going to grow much at all. Which means I have to try to keep it in check with InT.
The rest was premium equipment, but with everything focusing on either Mental Resistance or Mental Attack I don’t see where I can use it, but it is also too dangerous to sell, and with this crappy design highschool girls also won’t be interested. Highschool girls have pretty strict standards, you know? Well, dismantling those for materials is an option too. I mean, since I found those? Yeah, I found them lying in a pile in which I stacked the equipment I took off the knights? Finders keepers?
I’d like to finish the business in the Capital ASAP, pick up the orphans, go back to the Frontier and dive into some dungeons, but it seems like it will take a while to get to that. But just as I thought, having no ViT turned out to be self-destructive and suicidal. And since my HP is also low, I’m going to end up on the verge of death in every fight that isn’t over in an instant. Or rather, it hurts.
Picking up a torn-off hand and sticking it back just like that feels somehow wrong for a human, but perhaps it’s just my imagination? Well, this time I once again had 『Race: Human』 in my Status, which must be a proof that there is nothing wrong with that! The name and race are probably the only two entries that can be trusted in that Status. Seriously, that’s one entry that I don’t want to doubt?
It’s about time for dinner, but since it’s still raining I went and gave the girls riding in the following carriage lunch boxes with rice with bamboo shoots. Everyone must be tired, so they are slouching super hard! I even warned them before entering, but no one made an effort to put clothes on? Everyone was wearing tank tops, tube tops, short pants and even mini skirts or leggings. Possessing such a vast collection of clothes they are dressed casually with a high degree of exposure when by themselves. Should I just make pajamas for them? They are going to laze around anyway?
The following 『HIGHWAY STAR』 carriages number one and two have ten people riding in each, but each time I bring them lunch boxes they are trying to pull me inside an already crowded carriage, and since everyone is dressed like that, I’m each time greeted by 20 bare highschool girl legs. I’m convinced they had their femininity and shame converted into ViT and HP from how defenseless their chest area looks, threatening to spill the poorly concealed flesh, or rather, I worked so hard on those bras, so wear them for crying out loud? Leggings also turned out to be an unexpectedly dangerous item, giving me a hard time with finding where to look, in a highschool boy sort of way, making me go into Overdrive with taking close up shots with Rajingan. Yeah, even if I avert my gaze I still can stare directly in 360 degrees at once? Wisdom-san also seems to be already busy with recording and organizing new data.
Well, we are traveling at ease, so lazing around is fine too. Since the war is finally over and everything somehow ended without anyone dying.
Thank you. Hopeful this is the end of the new chapter prologue.